Why are people of the catholic faith who are getting married so adamant about the other person converting.?

Question

Or taking classes so they can get married in the catholic church? I think it's pretty bold to say, do this or don't marry me, but I have heard this on SEVERAL occasions from different couples. So you are telling me to believe in what you believe in, or fake it so we can get married and if I don't it's a deal breaker? Seriously, someone who has some knowledge answer this? Any priests out there surfing the web? Isn't it better to be steadfast in your belief, whatever that may be then to waiver for the sake of pretending to believe? Catholic, Muslim, Jewish, or whatever you are, God knows your heart, so why force people to lie to themselves just to sign a piece of paper.

I understand one does not have to convert, but they do have to promise to raise the children Catholic.. hummm, so regardless of my beliefs...I have to make a promise to a child that has yet to be born that I will force them to be rasied Catholic so I can get married. WOW, sounds very Spiritual. How romantic.

Answer 1

This all depends on the circumstances, and your priest.

I am Catholic, my wife Methodist. We were married Methodist, then convalidated in the Catholic Church. So we're both happy.

A Catholic marriage is not dependent on the non-catholic person "converting." It only requires that the Catholic party gets married in the Church or have the marriage convalidated. Our priest even told us that its important for each of us to have our own faith and he never once tried to get my wife to convert to Catholicism. So we can go to mass on Saturday, then to a Methodist service on Sunday.

The only thing they (the Church) ask you to do is to make aware the Catholic faith to your spouse and children. You basically have to promise to "do your best" to educate your family about the Catholic faith, but it is definitely NOT a requirement (or even a goal, really) to get them to convert.

Like others mentioned, the biggest reason for any of this is because it can cause marital disunity. For example, Catholics and Protestants have been at each others throats for several hundred years...so they just want to make sure you don't bring that disunity into your home.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says the same thing, and it also adds that mixed marriages can lead to religious indifference.

Check out section 1633 - 1637 of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (link below) if you want to learn more about this.

Answer 2

I am a religion teacher the the Catholic Faith and know for a fact that you do not have to convert in order to get married in a Catholic Church.

Only one person has to be Catholic to get married in the Catholic church. You do have to take pre-nuptial classes before getting married. That can be done one of 3 ways, depending what the particular church offers.

The first is going once a week in the evening, meeting with a married couple from the church with other engaged couples.

The second is a one day pre nuptial retreat.

The third is a prenuptial weekend retreat.

All three of these options should be discussed with a priest or deacon of the church.

Next is if the person getting married has not been confirmed, then that person will take classes to be confirmed prior to getting married.

Understand one thing, when getting married in the catholic faith, the only thing you have to do is promise to raise your children in the catholic faith, if your are not catholic.

Answer 3

+ Mixed Marriages +

The Catholic Church allows marriage between Catholics and non-Catholics. Converting is not required by the Church.

Because the Church recognizes the tremendous challenge that the interfaith couple will face, they may have to get permission from the bishop.

For more information, see the Catechism of the Catholic Church, sections 1633-1637: http://www.usccb.org/catechism/text/pt2sect2chpt3art7.htm#1633

+ Learning +

Only the sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick does not require classes before reception.

All six of the other seven Sacraments of the Catholic Church require catechesis (learning) before they are received, this includes:
+ Baptism
+ Confirmation
+ Eucharist
+ Reconciliation
+ Holy Orders
+ Matrimony

This is to ensure the person receiving the sacrament knows what is happening and fully appreciates the duties and responsibilities that come with the sacrament.

+ With love in Christ.

Answer 4

Catholics are not adamant about the other person converting.

We are adamant about any couple that gets married in the Catholic Church understanding how serious we take the Sacrament of Marriage.

I was a Protestant that married a Catholic Girl 23 years ago, sure we had to attend a marriage class, just like any other couple that gets married in the Catholic Church even if they are both Catholic.

I never tried to conver her and neither her or her wonderful family ever tried to force me to become Catholic either.

I did become Catholic 2 years ago after lots of Study and both my conversion and my Marriage have been a huge blessing in my life.

The Catholic Church does not want members that pretend to agree, that is not healthy spiritually for you or the Church.

So, follow your heart, I would think that if you are really interested in a life long commitment that you would want to learn about each others faith and hopefully do a lot of discussion with your mate before marriage.

Our divorce rate is to high already.

Peace and God Bless!

Answer 5

Yes, it is better to be steadfast in your belief, which is what the Catholic person is doing.

My daughter is engaged to a young man, he is a non-denom church goer. He does not have to become a Catholic to marry her, but he does have to agree to marry in the Church, no use of birth control, and the children must be baptized and raised Catholic.

This is not to force her beliefs on him, but she knows that doing the will of God is not an area of compromise. If her boyfriend does not agree, then he is not the man for her. Making compromises of faith, can only lead to problems down the road.

For the record, her fiance has agreed to the above but says he will not become a Catholic.

Answer 6

The Catholic church recognizes that "mixed" marriages have a higher divorce rate. They are not the only ones requiring marriage classes, it is a very sincere effort to make sure a marriage starts out with the very best chance to succeed. The Church does NOT say you "have" to join to be married. Any church that truly believes in it's doctrine naturally wants people to believe the same way, that is simply human nature. If you believe worshipping butterflies is the way to eternal salvatioin, wouldnt you want other people to think the same way?

Answer 7

Seems it happens also in the islam religion, that if one has islam religion and will marry the non islam, this non islam person should be converted to islam. We all can see that religion is man made. Who say one is right and the other is not right, or one is better than other. No one should convert their believe in connection with marriage.
So who plays God. Or is there really God. God is also man made. I love and marry a person although this person has different believe than mine. It the end I found out that this religion (islam)is nonsense. I left my believe and my spouse left his believe. We are non believer since. My spouse and I have been married happily for thirty years.

Answer 8

I was raised Catholic and the reason is that they want to ensure that the children will be raised in the Catholic faith. The non Catholic also has to promise to raise the kids as Catholics.

Answer 9

I am not sure where you are getting your information but you do NOT have to be a chatholic to to marry a catholic or get married to a chatholic in a catholic church. You only have to agree to raise your children catholic and claim to believe in god.

Answer 10

any family that is involved in religeon is going to want someone marrying into it to be of the same general beleifs ... resisting that just makes the person an outsider ...