Me and my baby's father is broken up... while we were broken up for at least 3 1/2 months I moved on to another guy... me and that guy didn't work so I'm back single. My baby's father wants to get back with me and is really trying now. But I had sex with another guy. He recently asked my that question Did I do it to anyone else? He said if my answer is yes then he's going to move on. If my answer is no then he's going to make it work with me.. What should I do? In addition I kept asking him do he do anything with anyone else and he said no he's not fast.. That makes it worst..
2007-07-13 05:20:31 · 33 answers · asked by mamas_love2u 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't tell him.
You broke up - it doesn't matter what you did while you were separated.
What he doesn't know won't hurt him. If he does care for you and you still care for him you might be able to get back together. Especially as you have a child together. If he knows about stuff with the other guy it will just play on his mind and he will feel insecure and jealous about it!
So, don't tell him. Every woman needs to keep certain things secret - if only because men can't handle knowing the truth!
2007-07-13 05:26:44 · answer #1 · answered by confused_kitty 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
The risk to lying is that more often than not, you'll get caught.
You were with another guy during a period of time that you weren't attached. What you did is none of his business unless you didn't practice safe sex and contracted a STD.
The same goes for him.
Don't get back together "for the sake of the baby". If you get back together, do so because you love each other. That takes communication, commitment, honesty, and trust.
If he plans on moving on if he doesn't get the answer he wants, you'd be better off telling him to move on now. You don't owe him the reason why. If you don't tell him the truth and he finds out, he'll probably leave you anyway. Why go through the heartache a second time?
If he does move on, it does not relieve him of the responsibility of helping to support his child, financially and emotionally. If you haven't already, it may be a good idea to establish paternity and formalize a support agreement.
Good luck!
2007-07-13 05:34:35 · answer #2 · answered by labmuttmix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no use to tell him what happened while you two were broken up. You didn't cheat on him and that's all that matters. What you do with your body while your not committed to him is YOUR personal business. You telling him will only hurt his feelings and why do that if you don't have to. The question you should be asking yourself is why did we break up in the first place and then why are we getting back together? Either way I don't think that you should tell him what's none of his business unless you had unprotected sex with the other guy and your kids dad is at risk of catching something. Trust me I have 6 uncles and if there's one thing I know is men, and he will hold this against you for ever. You'll NEVER hear the end of it. Honestly is not ALWAYS the best policy. Even Dr.Phil says so
2007-07-13 05:28:00 · answer #3 · answered by ninthwonder27 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You Believed Him? Come On His A Guy. And If He Really Wants To Work Things Out With You That Shouldn't Matter..The same Thing Happened To Me And My Ex But He Has Never ask Me That Cause Maybe His Scare Of My Answer.If You Do Tell Him He Should Keep In Mind That You're Been Honest Cause You Want Things To Work Out.
2007-07-13 05:32:38 · answer #4 · answered by DYC 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him move on, and just take of his financial obligations being the baby's father. You thought you were broken up with him for good, and months later you met someone else that you had sex with. He's given you an ultimatum for the answer he wants to his question, and then makes it harder for you to be honest because he claims he's not that "fast." This shows a lack of class, respect, and perspective. Tell him you don't answer ultimatums and dump him like last night's trash.
2007-07-13 05:28:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, this may sound lame, but relationships have to be based on trust, and trust starts and ends with honesty. If you sleeping with another man while you were NOT going out with your baby's father is something he can not handle, then let him know now and let the chips fall where they may. If you are not honest with him now, it will be something that is on your mind for a long time. What happens if you don't tell him, and you get back together...get pregnant again..and THEN he finds out and he is out the door? Be honest, it is a good way to live.
Best of luck to you and your baby.
2007-07-13 05:25:50 · answer #6 · answered by BIG Sean 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell The Truth And Tell Him You Messed Up And Your Super Sorry Cause You Really Wanna Give It Another Try.
2007-07-13 05:23:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth.. if he finds out later in the relationship,it could get bad.. If he loves you he'd try to get back with you no matter what..
But you see this relationship didn't work out at first, what make you think that it's going to work out this time? It's up to you, but just be careful and see whether there are any ulterior motives for him wanting to get back together.
Most important of all, is the child.. Do what you think is right for the child..
2007-07-13 05:26:36 · answer #8 · answered by deadbird 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What happens when you're broke up is not his business. I'm more concerned with you saying 'my baby's father'. You're not making any kind of relationship statement there. The two of you need to find things you have in common apart from a baby if you want things to work out.
2007-07-13 05:25:39 · answer #9 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yeah but that is all talk. first of all if you were broken up during that time then you didnt do anything wrong by hooking up with someone else. so for him to hold that over you is unfair. in addition, it sounds very controlling to tell you that based on your actions he will or wont get back with you. if he wants to get back with you, then it shouldnt be conditional, especially based on that condition. finally, he may say he hasnt done anything but you cant verify that any more than he can verify you. so its basically irrelevant. i would tell him, look if you want to be with me then you take me as is, percieved faults and all. reassure him that if you are together that you will be faithful and true. but also tell him that you cant be with someone who is going to love you conditionally and remind him that love has risks. he either takes the risk to rekindle with you or he moves on but regardless the talk of who you were with when you were broken up shouldnt be an issue.
2007-07-13 05:26:21 · answer #10 · answered by asg_is_chillin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋