What would u do if your girlfriend asks u, "Why is my diamond less than 1 carat?" after you propose?

Question

I proposed to my girlfriend with a stone slightly smaller than 1 carat. A few days later, she asks me, "How come I did not get a 1 carat diamond?"

I know she's always wanted at least a 1 carat diamond ring but I ain't earning big bucks and well, I didn't think an additional 0.15 carats should have cost me double the price.

I had also bought her an additional diamond encrusted ring (to use as her wedding band). I know she really liked that too, so I thought it would be nicer to have two rather than just one.

I'm heart broken now. What would you do?

Answer 1

not so simple, but, I would simply say, well, let me have the ring back, and we will see what we can do.
I would go sell the ring and tell her to get lost.
if she is so materialistic that a 1ct diamond is all she wants, then there is a problem.
get rid of her now, or all of your life you will be paying through the nose, for all the expensive things in life, and you will be broke forever (until you get divorced)

Answer 2

I'm sorry for how you feel now. I think you need to re-evaluate if this woman is someone you should be spending the rest of your life with. I'm sure she has many great qualities, but unreasonable selfishness is an important flaw. It flows into so many other aspects of your relationship. I'm sure that no average person can tell the difference between a .85 and 1.0 carat diamond in a setting. The fact that she asked why it wasn't a full carat a few days later suggests that she took the ring to a jeweler to have it evaluated. Why would she do that? Is the ring more important than the relationship? If she can't make this small of a compromise, and if she thinks she alone gets to make the decisions that should be made as a couple, then I am worried about the future for you. Will she dictate everything in your life: when and how many children, where you live, how you spend your money, who your friends are, where you go, what you do, where you work? I strongly encourage the two of you to do a little more work on your relationship before you commit to a lifetime together. Best wishes. You sound like a good guy.

Answer 3

It sounds like she may be a little bit spoiled or she showed it to her friends and they were messing with her head. The best thing to do is tell her you really can't afford the carat right now and that's why bought her the additional ring. Most girls understand if their man wasn't making a lot if she understands then tell her later on when your making more money you will buy her a more expensive ring for an anniversary. If she doesn't understand you might want to think about how shes gonna act the rest of your life together if you can't give her the big house and car.

Answer 4

Wow, that's harsh. Hate to sound mean, but it sounds like all she wants is the big ring. i realize maybe she had her heart set on that 1 carat ring, but I doubt .15 of a carat is noticeable. if she really loved you she would be happy with whatever ring you got her. she can always upgrade later on, on an anniversary or something. you should probably step back and think about this. if she is like this over a ring, how will she be about other things? good luck and hope everything turns out for the best, whatever that may be.

Answer 5

I would definitely wonder where you're fiance's heart really lies. She should have been satisfied with what you were able to afford. I completely understand where you are coming from, things get REALLY expensive fast once you hit 1 carat. Does she understand that? Even if she does, it shouldn't matter whether its 1 carat or even has a diamond at all. She's marrying you, not the ring. Rethink the marriage. Maybe she's not the girl you thought she was.

Good luck and best wishes!

Answer 6

I agree with what everyone else has said in that it shouldn't be about the ring. But hoping that she's not a materialistic b**ch, I would consider the following:

It's possible she had a very specific ring, or style of ring, in mind. Girls spend a lot of time planning their dream wedding, complete with dresses, rings, etc. She might just be disappointed that her vision did not match what she received in real life. I would let her know that you took a lot of time and care selecting the ring, and that her response made you feel like she cared more about the rock than about you. Maybe you'll get lucky and she'll tell you she didn't realize how unappreciative she sounded.

You could also mention to her that you don't have a lot of money right now, and that maybe for your 1-year anniversary (or 5-year or whatever), the two of you could go to a jeweler and get an 'upgrade'. I've heard of some jewelry stores offering that service (although I would personally prefer to wear the ring that was given to me initially).

If you decide to stay with her and plan this wedding, look for any more red flags that she isn't in it for love - if she continues to be demanding and selfish, I would seriously reconsider the relationship.

Good luck!

Answer 7

I'm a woman. I've never been proposed to, but I tell ya--I'd be happy, if it was the right guy, with a ring spontaneously made out of tin foil. I don't know how selfish and shallow your girlfriend usually is, but WOW that takes the cake. I would not marry her, no way sir, because it's only going to get worse and you will end up being a very unhappy, overworked and underappreciated husband. Break it off post haste, and take heart that if you do have the guts to leave her, there are women like me out there who do really appreciate a partner for who they are, not what material things they provide--women who would be floored for days that you loved them enough to present them with an engagement ring with that much diamond in it. That's a lot of diamond compared to the average ring.

Answer 8

Well first of all, good for you guys for being so great about protecting the planet. For your proposal, you should forgo the handcuffs, but do get a ring, and bring flowers. As for the type of ring, since you don't want to go with diamonds, why not make it another birthstone? Or the stone of the month you are proposing...or getting married? Engagement rings now are various styles and colors so you really have a lot to choose from. I might agree with pearls for a ring choice, but they require a little more TLC especially if worn on a daily basis. So I recommend a colored gemstone. Best of luck to you!

Answer 9

Your bride to be has preconceive notions that 1 carat is a magic size.

Tell her on your budget it was this diamond or a lower quality 1 carat and you thought quality was more important and you are hurt by her reaction.

Tell her you will take back the ring if she doesn't like it. If she returns get your money bank, and rethink your engagement.

Answer 10

?That one question (unless she was just picking with you and I doubt she was) is a hint of your marriage to come. You bought what you could and you love her, why should it matter what size the ring is. A little under a carat is still a big ring, bigger than what I've got.

You need to talk to her and feel around about her materialistic qualities and make it clear that you are working as hard as you can and that your lifestyle will have to compliment your job and that you're not going to go into mounds of debt to have the best things.

I still think you should really re-think the marriage.

Answer 11

get the ring back, and take her out next tuesday with the garbage!

It should never be about the ring....and if she is that self centred (sorry I'm Canadian), selfish, and greedy...maybe a rethink is necessary.

Alternatively, sit down with her, she should know your cash situation, tell her straight out, that it should not be about the ring...but if she really needs at least a carrat, than she can help, and you'll return/trade in the current one for her choice, but if she pays the difference.

Don't be down on yourself dude! Not at all! You did what your heart told you, proposed, and did the best you could....do you really think that a ring, or a couple of thousand dollars, should really make any difference to someone who will spend a life with you, where that will end up being a drop in the water of the money, debt, etc you will build together