This question's for the guys out there...help me out please?

Question

I tend to see good-looking girls date guys with no looks and NO PERSONALITY, INTELLIGENCE, etc.

They're generally jerks, too. I guess what I'm saying is that guys, all types, ALWAYS have options, whereas girls are judged primarily on their looks (again, primarily, not absolutely). I just mean, I've rarely-to-never seen a really good-looking guy with an average girl (who's qualities are rooted in her personality, not just looks).

Is there a scientific reason behind the FACT (don't argue here, you know it's true) that guys are more visual, often thus more commonly labeled "superficial," than girls WHEN *INITIALLY* deciding which girl to approach and get better acquainted with.

In response to one of the last posts, I'm never denying that the physical is a major component to attraction-I HAVE EYES, MAN. I'm just sayin that it shouldn't be the primary determinant, and you can't deny that there are so many more girls willing to compromise with looks if a guy's got a great personality, but NOT VICE VERSA.
Why?

Oh and GIRLS DO NOT HAVE MORE OPTIONS. Guys always say, "i love it when a girl approaches me-shows confidence." But in practice, what they either do is reject the girl b/c they think the girl is desperate, or sleep with her, because they think the girl is desperate. See what I mean. Theories are nice and all, but I've seen it play out in real life. It rarely works out.

So what we have here is a system where girls have to look cute to catch a guy's eye and "hope beyond all hope" (wt...??) that he'll ask her out and they'll get along, etc.
But with guys being so visual, it ends up being what i said before: girls have less options!
seriously...

Answer 1

well me personally, i'm always attracted to looks first, but i have to get to know the person. if they arent kind or funny or anything that makes them a great person, then i dont pursue a relationship. i dont understand why people only go for the looks. i mean, whats the point of owning a really beautiful car if there isnt an engine in it? its completely useless. what i am saying is, the engine is the personality of the person. sure they may be gorgeous or whatever, but if there isnt an "engine" in them, then it is pointless. i hope i made sense haha. have a good one

Answer 2

WRONG. It is exactly the opposite. Women are the ones that have the majority of options, not men. Women are the ones that make the choices on who they date, not the men. The man asks the woman out, or to be his girlfriend etc., and she is the one that says yes or no. It is her choice, not the mans choice.
What the man does choose is which girl to ask. Those choices start with looks. You don't go to a club, look at a woman, and say: "Boy! I bet she has a brilliant personality!"
Women don't date a guy because of his personality either. If he has a good personality, and is a great guy, she wants to keep him in the "friend zone". She would rather choose to date the guys that are dangerous, mysterious, and that she thinks she can change.

Answer 3

ANY guy will tell you that girls have WAY more options than guys (And you know that too) I've always considered my GF as a hotty and wondered what the hell she's doing with me. Then I look in the mirror and understand............okay kidding, but you are generalizing things too much. One persons trash is another persons treasure. Attraction is a funny thing. Initially, I think most of us have to go with the visual........but, after getting to know someone in other areas they compensate for whatever "Flaws" other people may see.

Answer 4

its just the way people are made ... does that work?

guys are more superficial but it has its draw backs but having your attractiveness not well defined can also be hard

most guys can be very attractive but they have to have that confidence and boldness which can be hard when they are not necessarily attractive by normal standards and when women get to be the judge of them

if girls a girl is attractive physically she has basically got it made. But if you are an unattractive girl ... it is hard to change that and developing your personality and doing things that guys like will only get you so far

Answer 5

Terrible. Just terrible. Look at these thoughtless pathetic answers. This stuff belongs at Yahoo Opinions not answers.

There is a biological basis for the phenomenon you observe. Shocking that people are willing to answer your question without even referencing the concept I'm about to explain. It is my sincerest wish that people would SHUT UP when they don't know what they're talking about. You won't find me opining in the physics section, I'm a biochemist!

So anyway, Dawkins wrote "Life is the dance of reproduction." The behaviors involved in chooseing a mate are generally some of the most hard wired (genetically determined) phenotypes. In our species and our evolutionary history, it has been the responsibility of the woman to raise children. Men have also contributed (we have evidence of small family like social structures dating to about 250,000 years ago.

Because our young are so underdeveloped at birth relative to newborns of other species reproductive success dosn't truly occur at conception or at birth. It occurs when the children reach offspring. This means that the raising and protection of the children is a critical component to successful reproduction.

Women are more invested in the rearing of a child for one reason: they typically have one baby at a time, and about one per year (when modern society isn't in the way). This is their maximum potential, and it's largely a one-shot deal.

Men? We can ejaculate 10mL of semen daily at a concentration of 100 million sperm / mL. THAT'S a Billion BABY MAKERS daily people! The male reproductive strategy is to inseminate early, often and repeatedly.

Therefore, Men are MUCH less invested in the quality of their mate than women are evolutionarily speaking. Men have the liberty to choose a mate based on a nice rack or long hair, because tomorrow it'll be somebody else's turn.

Women, have to look MUCH deeper. They need suggestive evidence that their mate will be a good protector and provider while the women is in gestation. There's nothing on the outside of a man that offer's any clues. Women then are genetically hard wired to place more emphasis on personality and temperament than men are.

They are stuck with their reproductive choices ALOT longer than men.

But don't feel sorry for yourselves ladies. You have controlled access so efficiently that in modern society monogamy is the social norm. I'll explain that one another time though.

I hope my scientific answer to your question hasn't drawn your attention away from Paris Hilton for too long. My apologies to you and the people who posted their pathetic answers.

Answer 6

That's cause the girl always wait for the guy to come to them. Maybe if she approached the guy she will get what she wants in a man. And I have had relationships with less than perfect girls. But you are right, guys mostly always go for looks over anything else.

Answer 7

This is offensive in countless ways, not to mention contradictory. You say you've "rarely-to-never seen a really good-looking guy with an average girl," and the premise of your whole post is based on the behaviors and interests of good-looking people. In your opening sentence, you even list looks before personality and intelligence. So before you point the finger and call us superficial and shallow, realize that your own interest in men is based on looks.

Answer 8

to be truthful girls can be the exact same way. but for arguments sake- in then initial stage of attraction yes it can be visual but then again because we have intelligence we sort out the visual with the inner person's attributes which therefore if the woman is a total loser then her personality supersedes her looks in regards to dating.

Answer 9

yes we are, i go for looks before anything else, but if the woman is dumb or has an annoying personality it doesn't matter how good she looks i do not put up with that. although i am picky, which is why i have a g/f every 2 - 3 years

Answer 10

I could never go out with a girl who was a boring dipshit. Honestly, I can not get sexual with someone who doesn't attract me physically. Isn't everyone that way?

There were many girls that I would have jumped at the chance to go out with, but they just weren't interested in me physically, so I know both sides of that fence.

Interesting points you make