ok so here is my dilemma I just recently got back in touch with my childhood best friend and I am going to ask her to be in the wedding. we have already chosen our wedding party. i know she won't mind be adding now bc we have just reconnected.
however now in order to even up things we have to ask another groomsmen...which in this case is going to be my other brother.
my one brother was already asked to be in the wedding party from the start. how do i ask my other bro without making
him seem second rate? orignally we only chose 3 people on each side bc i didn't have a 4th and also bc we couldn't afford it.
but now we are under budget and can afford the extra people a bit more.
i just need to know how to approach asking my other brother should we give him an explanation or just ask?
2007-07-12 03:57:46 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
yes i asked this question 2 hours ago. i was hoping to get different/more anwsers.
2007-07-12 04:05:05 · update #1
i'm not replacing anyone. and the childhood friend i'm asking bc we were very close all through grade school AND HIGH SCHOOL we just lost touch. so she is being asked and so is my brother. i'm just asking on advice on the best way to approach asking my brother.
2007-07-12 05:49:39 · update #2
If he understands why you didn't chose him in the first place, it shouldn't be a problem. Just say that after to working around that you found away to get him in because you wanted him there in the first place, but hadn't had the resources before.
2007-07-12 08:10:11 · answer #1 · answered by Samantha B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had my bridal party all planned and chosen and asked, and I ran into one of my old best friends from the time I was a baby till about 5 yrs ago. I lost touch with her, Just because I reconnected wtih her didnt mean I asked her to be in my bridal party.
And i dont really understand how adding someone to your party is goin to really cost you a whole heck of a lot of money? I mean you're already paying for favors and food for these ''guests'' so how is it that you;re spending a lot more on them? aside from an extra gift for being in the bridal party.. and that could be what, as low as $30 engraved from a nice store! So its not going to cost you a whole lot, and the fact that you're under budget now, doesnt mean you need to waste that extra money on a bridal party. Sometimes Its just best to leave things the way they are. you chose your bridal party for being there for you, your fiance chose his, Thats it! no adding!
I had to change my bridal party due to the fact that my bridesmaid and groomsmen couldnt make it (they were out of state) and we already paid for the dresses/tuxes, so we replaced them....
And I replaced my MOH for being nothing but a worthless drunk.. But those are actual reasons for replacing someone, or changing a bridal party, you cant just keep adding people. cuz eventually you'd have your entire guest list as part of your bridal party if you keep feeling guilty.
Just invite her, or ask her to read a poem or something if you want to include her, but I certainly wouldnt add her to the bridal party. The others in the bridal party might feel a bit awkward,, like now they're not good enuff you had to find someone bettter??? just leave it be.
2007-07-12 12:04:42 · answer #2 · answered by mannasox 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How about this. NOT asking your long lost pal to be in the wedding party BECAUSE you already chose other people.
Seriously, if she's lived however many years without being in touch with you - she can live without being a bridesmaid.
Invite her as a regular guest.
2007-07-12 11:32:25 · answer #3 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell them the truth.. Let them know that originally you only had it in your buget for 3 sets... But that now after getting everythign together and finding some amazing deals that you are now able to have it to originally the you wanted to have it. And you would be honored if they would be part of your joyous day. It would be a blessing to have two people in your lives who are impotant to yall..
Good luck an congrats..
2007-07-12 11:17:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you honestly want to ask a new friend or a rekindled relationship, ask them.
But DO NOT ask additional people just to even up the sides. That's incredibly insulting, rude and petty. You do not need even sides at your wedding. It is not a military march ... you ask people because you are close to them and because you love them. Not because you need a slot-filler. One groomsman can escort two bridesmaids ... it happens all the time and is by no means a big deal and won't look weird.
If you want your brother in the bridal party because you can't picture it without him, by all means ask. Explain that the situation has changed and hopefully he won't be offended.
But if you're mainly asking him because you think you need one more groomsman, don't bother. He'll know that he's a placeholder and he'll be (justifiably) insulted.
2007-07-12 11:10:38 · answer #5 · answered by BeatriceBatten 7 · 5⤊ 2⤋
well, if you really want to do this then I would just come right out and ask him to be in the wedding. no big deal, but I dont understand why you would want to ask someone (childhood friend) to be in your wedding if you just reconnected. if you managed to lose touch in the first place can you really rely on her to be in your wedding. or do you think it might be akward for her. I know for me it would be. anyways...your wedding...your call.
2007-07-12 11:11:19 · answer #6 · answered by Jenn ♥Cadence Jade's mum♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just tell him how excited that you and your fiance have come in under budget & that now you can include him, just like you wanted to. In fact, tell him you worked really hard to lower the budget, because it was important for him to be a part of the ceremony. Congrats!
2007-07-12 11:10:57 · answer #7 · answered by dani77356 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you already asked us this....just ask your little bro but dont tell him it's to even it out. tell him you realized that your party isnt complete without him.
2007-07-12 11:03:59 · answer #8 · answered by ♥Mommy to 3 year old Jacob and baby on the way♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
didn't we already answer this question????
2007-07-12 11:02:18 · answer #9 · answered by jamitha99 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋