My daughter is very intelligent, always receiving highest honors in scholl. I mention this because it's my opinion thast this has alot to do with why she feels she is always right. When we attempt to discuss a family decision to be made, if she doesn't receive the answer from me that she expects she begins hollering at me, her Father, and it always gets worse from there. She never respects my questions or opinions. My wife, of course her Mother, never interrupts to correct our daughter, and pretty much takes her side. I'm not a mean Father. I have given my daughter everything in her life that I possibly could. I have never spanked her, which I never believed in, and of course, is too old for that at this age even if I did. I honestly don't receive any support from my wife. If anything, she takes my daughter's side. At this point, Ireally like the best thing would be for me to leave for awile, although I'm probably the one that would hurtthe most. Can anyone shed any light on this?
2007-07-11 16:15:24 · 11 answers · asked by estreetbill 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Hi, I am 14 years old, just one year younger than your daughter. I have gotten straight A's all my life and I honor my parents. So grades aren't an excuse for disobeying you. I know you never believed in spanking, but when she was little, you should have found an alternative. Such as punishing her and then telling why you punished her. I suggest that when she screams at you raise your voice and enforce who's boss. Take away some of her freedoms, until she knows that you are in charge and not her. I know she might say the common, "I hate you" but it is better than her growing up to be something that you and I know is not good. Believe it or not but one day she might thank you for punishing her. It's things like this that can ruin a healthy relationship between you and her wife. Try this: The next time she raises her voice to you, you tell her that you are boss. And that because of her, she is jeapordising the relationship between you and your wife. Then, cease some of her freedoms. Tell her to her face what you are going cease ( for example a credit card, or shortening her curfew). Then tell her how bad you feel about the way she is treating you, I mean all you do is provide for her, cry a little bit- that should help a lot. Then leave, take a drive. This will or may cause her to get angry and cry. But then, it will cause her to think about all she has done. Think if all she has done is worth it. For the next few days don't talk to her at all, let her come to you. Then you will know that she has changed.
And Sir I feel bad at how your daughter has been treating you, but you can't let her control your family. If you have other children, enforce the rules while they are young, so they know that you mean business.
2007-07-11 16:53:52 · answer #1 · answered by BlackBeauty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have disciplined her when she was smaller, because she doesn't respect you. It seems like giving her everything made her feel like that's all you are good for. You and your wife probably never agreed on how to raise her (you probably spoil your wife too), and since she's the same sex parent she has trained your daughter how to treat you. The fact that you allow her to HOLLER at you without taking control of the situation gives her more confidence. I was raised by a single mother and I NEVER would have raise my voice at her, because of the respect I had (she passed) for her. Your daughter is not too old to begin losing privleges, because if you let her continue this way she's going to be a horrible adult......God help the man that marries her if she continues on this way!!
2007-07-11 16:26:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell your wife she is a bad mother and wife for not supporting you, and then tell your daughter she has lost all privileges for a month.No phone, no talking to friends and dates, no car, no going out to friends or no friends coming over.The reason she doesn't respect you is because she knows she doesn't HAVE to.You never spanked her and every kid I have seen who has never had a spanking treats their parents JUST LIKE you say your daughter treats you and worse.Yes, she may be too old for a spanking but you can get her attention when the cell phone is gone,If all else fails, remind her you are the parents ,she is the child THEN bend her over your knee and spank the stupid right out of her, then tell your old lady if she has anything to say, come on over and you'll give her some of the same.
2007-07-11 17:25:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
demand the respect dad. perhaps shes been doing this since she was young and you did nothing to fix the problem cause you probably thought it was cute.
she has to learn to respect other peoples views and opinions because when she gets out there into the real world she'll learn that not everybody is gonna agree with what she says
you dont believe in spanking so you have to start taking privelages away. speak to your wife about not defendin you. let your daughter know that you opinion counts also
2007-07-11 16:26:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
don't leave that's only going to make the problem worse. talk to your wife and tell her she's causing a rift between you and your daughter by not supporting your decisions where your daughter is concerned. you all must come to an agreement as to how to handle certain family situations otherwise the tension in the house is only going to escalate and tear the family up further. wish you all the best
2007-07-11 16:22:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The first thing that needs to happen here is a conversation between you and your wife, she as a good wife MUST support you as her husband. If she doesn't support you then you have not only problems with your child but with your marriage. Also you need to talk with your daughter, make it clear dis-respectful behavior is not acceptable. Perhaps a grounding or loss of privlages would help.
2007-07-11 16:22:05 · answer #6 · answered by I'm here for now 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am also 15 so I know how it is. I sometimes act like that too but what helps me is to be alone. So if you tell your daughter something she doesn't like just walk away and give her sometime to be alone. This gives her time to realize why you gave her the answer.
I hope I helped you in some way.
2007-07-11 16:23:48 · answer #7 · answered by Felecia 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Get counseling yesterday.
I wouldn't suggest leaving your family, although I bet it would help you feel a lot better. But please, please don't.
Your daughter sounds spoiled and hormonal. The mom doesn't want any conflict because her baby is growing up.
You will get through this but you will need help. Go get it--
Best Regards
2007-07-11 17:18:51 · answer #8 · answered by autimom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
teenager
That's all there is to it - leaving won't stop teenage behavior - and you wife, pardon me, is a chicken - she sees what your daughter dishes out to you and wants no part of that - so she lets you be the "bad guy"...can't say that I blame her though...the wrath of a 15 year old female can be deadly!
2007-07-11 16:24:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
put her over the lap and spank her. spare the rod and spoil the child
2007-07-11 16:45:05 · answer #10 · answered by uncrowned ruler 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋