My boyfriend and I have been going out for a year and a half we both are from the same race, religion and community. We both live here in the states and have known each other for 3 years prior to going out with each other. We have a awesome understanding of each other but i am an angry person. He loves his family way to much to leave them for me, but he really loves me from the bottom of his heart (and the love has proven itself). The problem is that his family wants to get him married arranged and the girl has to be from india. But we both love each other and dont know what to do. I am scared out of my mind, because i dont want to loose him but i dont know how to convince him to convince his parents and not take a "NO" for an answer. I love his family just like i love him, i am ready to accept whatever he wants him to do. But the problem is that how do we get his parents to agree to me???? any help here?? And this is ur typical "indian" love story!!!! THANKS FOR THE HELP!!!
2007-07-11 15:54:00 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I am actually a traditional punjabi girl. He has actually mentioned me in his family earlier this year and they said that her parents and they know each other and that sort of thing. Basically they dont know what "love" is because they both were married at a very young age. And so they dont exactly care about a love marriage. I am just preparing for the future because we both have time of about couple years before we can even start the marriage issue. But like i said i am very sacred and i rather be safe than sorry!!!!. any more suggestions?? Thank you for all the replies!!!
2007-07-11 18:54:04 · update #1
Your love story can definitely have a happy ending if you apply some mind to this problem. Just get help of some elder person known to you, preferably of same caste, community that of both of yours & let him meet the parents of this man with your proposal. Let this take a turn from love marriage to the arranged marriage where your introduction to his family by some one else, then their getting convinced about you & their move along with this person to your parents & getting their acceptence, thus resulting in your marriage with him ultimately. Now you two have done enough of this love game & let elders come in picture & play their part in arranging the marriage & getting it preformed in a conscious manner.
2007-07-11 17:46:07 · answer #1 · answered by vijay m Indian Lawyer 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
HALT!!!!!!! BEFORE YOU READ THIS MAKE SURE THAT U COULD DO ANYTHING FOR UR BOY EVEN CHANGE URSELF COMPLETELY!!!!!!!!!!! IF UR NOT COMPLETELY DETERMINED TO GET UR BOY THEN READING THIS WOULD BE A WASTE OF UR TIME!!!!!!!!!
Go to an indian beauty parlor one day and tell them to style ur hair and ur makeup just like a typical indian girl and then go to a good store and buy urself an indian sari or a HIGH FASHION indian suit! and go to a person that u can trust that knows everything about being a well behaved indian girl and can teach u traditions and everything!!!! then once the person ur getting advice from thinks ur ready!!! take ur makeover, sari or suit, and ur new personality to ur bfs house and show his parents how u could be!!!!!! this has a 90% chance of working so try it!!!!!
2007-07-11 16:34:45 · answer #2 · answered by Indian-Girl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask him to introduce u to his family not as his gf but as his friend and then visit them once in a while be friendly but u defnitely have to keep ur temper in check. ok. Try and win them over, u say u have time if u start it now u will defnitely succeed after two yrs. It would be very easy as it u belong to the same community. Good luck.
2007-07-11 22:58:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anastasia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a similar issue. In my case, both my parents and his mother were against us. We waited patiently and refused to get married to anybody else. But we said that we wont marry unless we get their blessings. It took around 8/9 months before we got all the blessings. I think the only way to do it is to stick your ground. your bf will do this if he is really in love with you.
2007-07-11 16:34:39 · answer #4 · answered by Lucky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way out is marry first then reveal to the parents. Automatically they agree even after some time or other.
2007-07-11 18:53:08 · answer #5 · answered by ky d 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that if your boyfriend told his parents that he wants to marry you than that would open the door for you all to sit down together and talk about it.
Are they gaining financially from the arraigned marriage? Are they trying to marry him off to keep him from you? These are things that you both need to find out but I think that if he first lets them know that he wants to spend his life with you that they may back off a bit.
Good luck!
2007-07-11 15:59:21 · answer #6 · answered by New England Babe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
y dont both u guys go together directly to his place & talk to his parents frankly about it & get the problem solved .... tell them about how much u love each other & how important each one is to the other ...etc...etc... & sort the problem then & there .... ask them y exactly they dont wanna accept u .... promise them tat u'll be better than the kind'a girl tat they expect & ...ask u'r guy to also open his mouth & talk on u'r behalf 2.... if he shuts his mouth ...then the answer will be "NO" only if he talks on u'r behalf .... it would do some help atleast....
all the best !!
2007-07-11 16:05:39 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what does your boyfriend say??? ask him because he is the main one here. most indian boys i know have an affair but don't have guts to tell his parents. they end up doing what his parents wants. good luck to you....
2007-07-12 03:32:18 · answer #8 · answered by always-smile 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋