i <3 him, and we are together all the time but i have some mental block where i cant go through with it... whats going on? also i think he is getting mad.... what do you think he thinks and what should i do?
2007-07-11 04:19:18 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
youre right- lack of info.
weve "done it" before... 1st time wasnt good 2nd time he couldnt get it up.....
then we broke up because he cheated on me and caught a std.
things worked out and weve been back together but only for a month. i care a lot about him, he cares a lot about me.
even when my body is ready there is this mental block... i always find some excuse. i feel like i dont have much more time i can avoid it before he finds someone else.
i know in the past he was a super slut... so sex is really important to him... and never so much so to me..
2007-07-11 04:38:39 · update #1
Sounds like you've got a lot of things to work out in your mind concerning sex. You should spend some time thinking about why you feel the way you do about it, and whether or not you agree with your beliefs. If it's all just residual bullcrap from your upbringing, then just let it go, tell yourself you don't agree with that stuff anymore, and move on. If you do have a strong, moral reason for not wanting to have sex yet, then don't have sex. It's that simple.
As for what your boyfriend is thinking; I'd imagine that he's probably just sexually frustrated, chomping at the bit, and he probably feels like you're leading him on, and he might even feel unattractive, and unmanly, since you don't want to tear off his clothes.
2007-07-11 04:24:56 · answer #1 · answered by numbnuts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you he shouldn't get mad at the situation, he needs to realize that your not ready and respect your decision. If sex is all he wants from the relationship then you don't need to be with him at all. Let him find himself an easy girl that will give it up to him on the first date. He should be proud of you for respecting your body and should know that he has a good girl that doesn't just sleep around even if yall are in a relationship. Let him know though whats going on, he cant read your mind, I mean a mans way of thinking is a total 360 from what women think. So don't keep him guessing or assuming anything, let him know nothing is wrong just that you want to wait for the perfect time place situation or whatever. If he doesn't understand that leave him and find someone else.
2007-07-11 04:32:31 · answer #2 · answered by MAYRA ALICIA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Maybe he just wants to look and not touch the merchandise so to speak! He may not be entirely at ease with this arrangement like you are or is worried that if he has sex with a girl, this means you'll end up having sex with a guy and he can't handle that yet or maybe he worried about how he will preform and all that. You can't force him to do it - just be understanding - it will probably take a while before he feels comfortable with it. You aren't doing it, so why should he?! I would never go to a swingers club - bf and I have happy sex life but if it makes you both happy then there no harm in it but I have the feeling he just going along with this for you and not really for himself. Lx
2016-05-19 09:16:04 · answer #3 · answered by amie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there is a lack of info, but I will try my best. First, you should NEVER feel pressured. If you do, then it isn't the right guy. Sometime we have out intuition that helps us make decisions, or NOT make decisions as the case may be. I would talk with him about it. Maybe you just aren't ready. Without knowing how long you have been together there are so many variables that apply. Talk to someone close to you that you know and TRUST. Friend, parent, teacher, co-worker. They can help give you the BEST advice because they know you, your boyfriend or BOTH.
2007-07-11 04:22:51 · answer #4 · answered by GidgetK 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you are very level headed!!! You want to take your time and not rush into anything......once you go through with it you can never go back!! He needs to realize you are not ready and if he doesn't you need to have a serious talk and discuss how both of you feel and how do you see this relationship going.. If he truly loves you and wants to be with you he will understand and wait until you are Ready..
And most guys don't think when it comes to that, as their sex drive i am positive takes over and they are NOT THINKING.
You definitely need to stick to your guns and make your own mind up without pressure. When you are ready you will know and remember to do what you want to do and not what others think you need to do when it comes to sex!!! Sex is a wonderful experience when the time is right and you don't want to give in and be another notch on somebody"s belt,he really needs to respect your feelings and do what you want!!!!
GOOD LUCK in your decision!!!!
2007-07-11 04:31:52 · answer #5 · answered by dee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it doesn't feel right, then don't do it. you will know when it's righr for you. Maybe you have some kind of intuition that's tellling you to wait. If the boyfriend gets upset with you, just tell him you'd rather wait until you feel comfortable with having sex. I hope you aren't leading him on, because he will get upset if he can't go all the way with you. Be upfront with him. If he wants to leave you, then you don't need him anyway.
2007-07-11 04:24:42 · answer #6 · answered by The pink panther 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um..if ur not ready then dont do it..he should be happy to be with u if he sleeps with u or not. I asked a question just like this and they said if he lives with his parents than u r way too young. u should wait till u know ur readty. Also think bout the things that can go wrong. u can get aids or get pragant. think bout it..this can change ur life forever
2007-07-11 04:24:52 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares a crap if he is mad or not? Don't let him manipulate you. He isn't going to die if he doesn't get some. Don't do it, if it doesn't feel right. When it is time you will know and nothing will be able to hold you back.
Next time he asks you... ask him if he wants to be a daddy.. because there is always that possibility.
2007-07-11 04:23:26 · answer #8 · answered by lily 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay if your boyfriend is getting mad at you for not sleeping with him, he's a jerk and you need to dump him.
You are obviously not ready for that kind of intimacy, and that is completely fine. You should not feel rushed into giving yourself away because your boyfriend is frustrated....that is stupid.
I think that you should take some time to get to know yourself better before you date seriously.
2007-07-11 04:22:30 · answer #9 · answered by Marie Catherine 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If a man is getting mad because you refuse to sleep with you, you should find someone who wants you for more than sex. Any guy who thinks sex is everything is a poor excuse for a human being in my book.
2007-07-11 04:22:16 · answer #10 · answered by The Stylish One 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋