My daughter made a sexual allergation towards her father (we seperated before she was born), we went to court heard all the evidence and the judge allowed him contact 2hrs a week, my daughter is petrified to go near him, i now face up to 10yrs in jail if i do not take her to these meetings...contempt of court they say.. protect my daughter i must do???
2007-07-11 03:47:38 · 30 answers · asked by susan m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
my daughter is 5yrs old
2007-07-11 03:56:56 · update #1
my laywer says thay need 2 witnesses to make a difference in court, this is second time i have took it back to court.
2007-07-11 04:00:00 · update #2
We are from the u.k
2007-07-12 03:08:45 · update #3
I feel so sorry for your daughter and you :(
And OMG asif They are making her see him after him abusin her?! surely this must be wrong, i especially if she dosent want to see him?!
Oh btw have you ever Seen Hostel? I think thats what they should do To peedos, Dont you aggree?
Hope everything works out ok :( x
2007-07-11 03:56:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Where is the contact? If you haven;t already done so demand that it is a community centre or the like, supervised by a social worker at all times. I know that it's still galling to have to take her but a social worker or similar will be able to monitor her and if she is really unhappy will take up your daughter's case in court. Expalin to your daughter that she won;t be left alone with her father and that there will always be someone there for her to run to. This way she is protected without you spending your life battling in court and if she continues to be distressed you have the opinion of a professional to back you up. Don't let him see her in any other circumstances.
2007-07-11 04:29:42 · answer #2 · answered by Skippy 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
your lawyer is cr@p. witnessess!!!! as if he's going to do it in front of witnessess.1st off sack him and get a decent lawyer. the very minimum should be supervised access, and really he shouldnt see him at all. did you press charges against him?? if not go to police, it might delay everything.
my god what an awful situation, are you uk or usa, with you saying lawyer i assume usa. our laws are different here. if you dont allow contact the dad has to take you back to court....this buys you some time to get psychiatric evaluations, doctors physical reports, school opinions etc whatever you can.
my situation was very different and i may get lots of thumbs down, but i went through a custody battle last year, even though kids had been with me for 9 years, their dad was emotionally and physically abusing them as was his new wife. my kids were terrified the judge would give him custody. about a week before the final hearing i decided, but only told one person who would help me that over my dead body would i hand those kids over, i would have dissapeared with them for ever, had he won.
a severe reaction to protect your child but it is an option should the courts let you and your daughter own. i wish you both safety and happiness
2007-07-12 02:45:33 · answer #3 · answered by slsvenus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something needs to be done about it. I'd appeal the court decision and ask for a different judge. Possibly a woman, since they're a little more sensitive to the issues, and maybe bring in a counselor that your daughter has spoken with, so they could speak on how it's a traumatic situation for your daughter to deal with.
2007-07-11 04:04:19 · answer #4 · answered by Candi is Dandy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to find another way, because if you go to jail who will protect your little girl. Make sure you or somebody is with her when he is. You need to get a better lawyer this monster needs to be kept away from her. The judge is probably a paedophile as well that's why he let this monster have access, any decent person wouldn't let him anywhere near her. A 5yr old can't lie about such terrible things.
2007-07-12 01:52:19 · answer #5 · answered by NJAS 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is totally disgusting, I think you need to get the papers involved, get a better lawyer and hopefully he will sort all this out for you, I so feel for you as there is no way I would want my daughter near a man like that, her safety must be first and foremost and hopefully a different lawyer and judge will see this, good luck and I hope something works out for you both really soon.
2007-07-11 10:17:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh I feel for you girl. I am sorry you are going through this. The problem is if you deny him those 2 hours and you go to jail. They may put her in his custody 24 hours per day. That would be worse than 2 hours per week. Is it supervised visits?
I would go and get your daughter the new phones they have out that you can program only 3 numbers in it. I would program your number, another persons and 911 in the phone. No incoming calls can come in only out. Explain to her if anything happens to dial these numbers. Never let her wear dress's, skirts, bathing suites or so forth.
I would want to run to but if you get caught it could be worse on the little one.
Way out your options girl.
2007-07-11 04:13:28 · answer #7 · answered by aintlifegrand 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask if the visits can be supervised. Have they seen that your daughter is scared to be around him? If you end up in jail, he'll be seeing her more than a couple hours a week so you're going to have to do what the courts say. Talk to a lawyer, I'm sure they can try to do something.
2007-07-11 03:57:03 · answer #8 · answered by IndiHippi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I personally would not go there! Keep your daughter away from him my dad this to me and i would never put my 2 daughters or my son through that. I would rather commit murder than let anyone who hurt them once hurt them again no matter what the courts say. If it means your daughter has a hard life cos of this monster why make it any harder than it needs to be. Keep him away from her or it will destroy her. You know what is for the best for your daughter and yourself fight him all the way til this nightmare is over with or else you could risk your daughters future. I never forgave my mum or my dad. I didnt forgive my dad for doing it in the first place and i didnt forgive my mum for not helping to keep him away for good. Do your best and the best will come from it. Good luck and i hope alll goes well for both of you x
2007-07-11 04:43:13 · answer #9 · answered by funbouncytigger 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why is your daughter "petrified" to go with her father? The judge allowed 2 hours a week, alone? or can you be there? Have you spoken with your daughter to see why she is so scared? Has he abused her? If there is any kind of abuse, you should contact a lawyer, I am sure there must be free lawyers if you cannot afford one, who can stop this. If there is no abuse, talk to your child, and make her understand it is her father, even if he has never been there for her, and she should try to know him. Don't stop those meetings by yourself, do it through a lawyer. If there has been no abuse, maybe it is you who is afraid to let him in your daughter's life, and maybe you should give him a chance to know her. I do not know the reasons for your separation, but if there has been no abuse, I insist, try letting him in, and talk to your daughter to try to know him better. Maybe he is really acting like a dad now. Maybe he is now mature enough to try to deal with a child of his own. Best of luck, dear!
2007-07-12 11:32:09 · answer #10 · answered by Adela C 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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I think you should get another lawyer and take it back to court and try for supervised visits. Explain to the judge how afraid your daughter is when she has to go with him Get notarized statements from your daughter teachers and others on how she acts when she returns from seeing him. Also look up your rights and your daughter rights If you go to jail he gets her full time so you will be defeating the purpose good luck!!!
2007-07-11 07:42:59 · answer #11 · answered by ladym 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋