why does everyone think its such a "joy" to have children?

Question

i understand they're cute & fun to play with & they're so innocent & stuff...but they're also a lotttttt of work & money,you know,you have to teach them everything,& deal with their constant crying & pooping,& wouldnt you be scared if your baby comes out deformed or something? how sad =( also,once you have them you have to deal with them for the rest of your life.so tihnk about it,do you really WANT kids?i want a good argument =) now,dont assume im so evil or soemthing,i love PLAYING with kids & i would never hurt them or anything but i wouldnt want my own...

if all you can tell me if grow up or some crap like that then obviously you dont have a good argument =)

well..no one has answered this part of my question yet: what if your baby comes out deformed & you couldnt raise him/her normally?then what would you do?how would you feel?

Answer 1

Not everyone is meant to be a parent. It is great that you realize you do not want children. Not everyone does. I think you need to make the right decision for yourself.
I have two daughters, very hard work and yes,,,,very expensive (even though we do not do the ipods and all the getting everything they want) we do need to teach them everything and how to be good people, deal with their crying and pooping, tantrums, arguing
hugging, laughing, the first "mommy" and "daddy."
first steps, first everything. For the people that have special needs children, I think God chooses them for a reason. They are truly special to care for the gift that God has given them. I give them the utmost respect and Pray for them that their lives will be as easy as possible.
Anyway, yes people have babies cause they are cute but you must keep in mind,,,,,,,they turn into teenagers!!!!!

Answer 2

I have 3 kids who are adults now. There were a lot of days I just wasn't feeling the joys of parenthood. But now that they have their own marriages and relationships and live in different parts of the country, I'd love to have a few of those days back. Children CAN be a great joy, but I really believe the parents who enjoy it the most are the ones who don't care that the kids mess up the house, or interrupt special time with your husband/wife or force you to wake up early on weekends to go to soccer games or hockey tournaments. If you're constantly resenting the fact that there is toothpaste spattered on the bathroom mirror or mud tracked in on the carpet or your little one has kept you up all night, you'll never find the joy in stomping in puddles or drawing chalk figures on the sidewalk.
Some of the joys of parenthood are kept hidden until the kids are grown---then you look back and remember how wonderful it all was and how quickly it went by.
Parenthood is a choice and it's not for everyone. There were many times I thought that if I had the chance to do it all over again, I WOULDN'T! But in the end, I'm glad I did.

Answer 3

Some people love kids and have the patience that other's just don't possess.

Also, some people are more inclined to understand children.

Trust me, I know they are hard. I am babysitting my two year old niece this week (Monday to Friday) and I'm exhausted already. It's so hard. The worst part is that the only time I can get on the computer or talk on the phone is when she is sleeping... but if I don't sleep when she sleeps, I'll be tired.

It's very difficult, but like I said some people have a knack for it. Even though I know how hard it is, I still want 4 or 5 kids some day... mostly because it's always easier when you are raising your own kids. It's hard when a child is already "trained" and is a brat... it's always harder to care for someone else's child.

Answer 4

Children are our future. I don't have any kids, but I love them. The same people on here saying that it costs too much money to raise a kid are most likely the same ones who have pets. Well let me put this bug in your ear... who pays for maintenance for keeping an animal, but complains about children? Interesting enough that some of the people here have had more than one child and when they are the main ones who are trying to convince us that we shouldn't have any. If one is too much why did you have two or three?

Unlike adults children are innocent until taught wrong. Of course a child will be bad, but only if you let them and teach them wrong. Having good parenting skill is a major part of becoming anyone's mentor. People have lots of kids because they love kids and there's no better explanation for that. I know no person to this day that had more than one kid that don't like them. People adopt kids for many reasons... some children don't have the privilege to have someone to take care of them. If certain people who don't like kids didn't have sex or prepared themselves better, there wouldn't be a need to adopt.

When you grow up you make choices and live with them. Responsibilities are what some people have and some don't know how to handle.
* I agree with scorpio

Answer 5

The joy comes from facing a challenge and succeeding (or, at least, knowing you tried you best). The challenge comes in so many forms, teaching them, keeping them healthy & safe, managing the time & money & energy. It's exciting, exhilirating.

And, on top of that, you get to see a whole person evolve and emerge. You get to study all of human existence & development on a micro-scale, right there in your own home. It's fascinating!

It *does* take a lot of patience, time, energy and money to do it. It's not a life choice for everyone. But, for some of us, it's the most fun we'll ever have!

Answer 6

You can't possibly understand that "joy" part of parenthood until you have a child.
It's a strange thing that happens when you know that something relies on you 100% for survival. It's hard, but it's fulfilling in a way that is hard to explain.

I wasn't a "baby person" before I had kids. Then, I had my first baby...& now I can't imagine life w/ out either one of my kids. You hear about it all the time...that unconditional love that overwhelms you when it comes to your kids. It's no joke. As much as I've loved my own parents all of my life & as much as I love my husband, nothing compares to what I feel for my kids.

Answer 7

There is nothing wrong with not wanting children. In fact I think more young people anymore are reaching that same conclusion. However, as time goes on they may change their mind. The same with you if you do not want children for whatever reason then you do not have to have them, and should you change your mind at a later date that is OK too. Either way it is your choice, and thanks to modern medicine you can make the decision.

Answer 8

Not everyone is suited for kids. I have high praise for those who know they are not suited for kids, and act on that. Nothing is more sad than someone who has a child, and clearly does not appreciate and treasure thier gift.

I have 2 boys..i would give my life for..it is hard to explain the love i have for them..it is more than i have ever known. No, it is not always fun and games..but the love, keeps getting strionger the more we grow together.

Answer 9

I know, I have two and they are tons of work. I can't understand the people that just can't get enough kids, have 8 or 10 kids of their own and take in foster kids and all that. They must be insane.

Don't get me wrong, I love my kids but I think the "joys" of parenthood are vastly overrated, just like the "joys" of homeownership and the supposedly "better job" you'll get from going to college. I believe that in order to perpetuate certain behaviors (human reproduction) and commercial enterprises, these 3 lies about American life have been glorified way more than they should be.

Answer 10

I am wondering ..no one wud have been there to ask this ,if ur parents must have thot the same. Also you know kids are no different than LIFE as such...where theres joy theres sorrow.Its everywhere not only with kids. Anws its your choice..you can live without them if you want.