Have you had to wear a bridesmaid dress that was too revealing?

Question

The bride selected a backless, plunging v-neck halter for the bridemaids to wear in her October wedding. I am mortified and dreading even being seen in public in it much less walking down the aisle in front of so many people. Why would she do this? The other girls seem to like it and the bride is the type who will hate me if I say anything. It's not worth it. Does she really want everyone to look bad on purpose?

Answer 1

Just because she is a bride and its her day does not mean that she can make you do something that is uncomfortable to you. Tell her you are not that type of girl and feel extremely uncomfortable. If she doesnt care or hates you for it, politely step out of the wedding party obligation. I could understand sucking it up if it was an ugly color or too fluffy or what not, but you do not need to inappropriately expose yourself for any reason. Respect yourself first and foremost. I am really sorry.

Answer 2

To make sure check with the other bridesmaids and see how they feel truly about the dresses. Maybe you and anyone that feel like you could talk with the bride and make changes on the dress for those who feel uncomfortable wearing them. And if there are no complaints from others, you should go to the bride and ask if you could maybe change or alter the dress, so you will feel more comfortable wearing down the aisle.

Answer 3

The problem with a revealing dress is that if the ceremony is in a chuch there will be a problem.
I went to a Wedding where the bridesmaids were low cut dresses and the bridesmaids were thrown out of the church by the priest.
If the bride chose the dresses so the bridesmaids look bad and make her look really good, she will regret it when her bridal party is escorted out of her ceremony.

Answer 4

Without involving the bride, ask the other bridesmaids (individually) if they like the fit of the dress and whether they're getting it altered. You should be able to tell by their responses if they feel the same way you do. Ask them one at a time so they don't feel pressured by the others to say they love it. If you all agree, tell the bride nicely.

Even if you're the only one, tell the bride the dresses look beautiful on the hanger but aren't so flattering on real bodies. My sister in law chose the WORST dresses for her wedding, and it turned out she hadn't tried them on herself! As soon as she saw how they fit, she apologized profusely and returned them, and together we picked out something new.

There's a good chance the bride only saw these dresses in a magazine and doesn't know how they look on real people.

Answer 5

apparently her opinions of good and bad and whether something is too revealing or not, are different than yours. maybe you could see if another bridesmaid does find the dress to revealing. then it would be easier to confront the bride, and tell her. and i know this isnt really nice, but if i was in this position, i am the kind of person who tries to avoid confrontation at all, i would probably just wear it and get it over with. but still, im sorry.

Answer 6

:( i am sorry to hear you feel uncomfortable. i picked dresses that sorta matched mine, just in blue. they were strapless, but did not show much at all.

do you think that she would allow you to go with a different style, but same color? are you the MOH (in either sense of the word)? because then in that case sometimes you are allowed to look a little different than the rest.

have you tried the dress on and you feel...um, like you are at the beach and exposed? has she seen other people in the dress? if you do haven't, i wold try it on at the store and tell her you are just not one to show this much in front of people you do not know.

are you SURE the other girls like the dress? maybe they feel like you do and are afraid she will yell at them too. perhaps if they feel the same way you can approach her (nicely) and voice your concerns.

personally i did not want anyone looking sexy at my wedding, not even me :P i wanted everyone to look beautiful and it is very hard to look beautiful when you do not feel that way. does this dress come with a wrap or something?

if she is really your friend (and she should be since you are in your wedding) she should not hate you. i would feel bad if i found out i made someone feel that way. it is best to tell her how you feel before it gets later than it already is.

Answer 7

If you really don't think it's worth it, then tell her you don't want to be a member of the bridal party.

Surely, knowing that the appearance her bridesmaids' dresses will be her fault, (meaning that if they look horrible, then she gets blamed) she wouldn't put you all in horrible dresses.

So maybe you're a bit on the prudish side or whatever, but this is her wedding, not yours. If you don't want to wear the dress, say sorry and ask to attend the wedding instead of being a member of the bridal party.

Answer 8

Not everyone looks bad in a dress like that. My cousin had picked out a gown like that for her 2nd wedding. She showed me the picture and I flat out told her that there was no way I would be seen in public in a gown like that. I'm a plus size woman and there is no way I'm going anywhere not wearing a bra. If the gown is that bad I would say something. Tell her you need a bra.

Answer 9

Talk to the bride. State that if that is the dress she wants the bridesmaids to wear that you will have to step down from the bridesmaids position.

BUT, try it on first. See if you like it ON you and how it feels. If you do not like it, then talk to the bride.

Answer 10

I would suck it up and wear the dress...most of the time dresses need to be slightly altered either length, taken in...etc. I would ask the seamstress to help you out so u dont feel too overexposed. They should be able to do minor alterations that wont make your dress look different, but maybe just not so low cut in the front (??) Get a shawl or something to wear at the reception.

Good Luck :)