We have been together a yr. We love eachother and are moving to a new apt. (we have lived together for 6 months). We are not easily mad about stupid things like "the toilet seat being left up" or my panties being left on his bed. But lately one thing annoys me so much!!
HE IS SOOO QUIET.
I love a good convo, about anything really. I will talk and talk and hope he will jump in, but he never does and then playfully teases me about talking so much. I am an actor and so I guess I am used to thinking a lot and sharing complex convos with other artists and thinkers of that nature. I want to be able to have a bf I can stay up till 3 am talking and never get bored. But he is not one to talk much! He is nice, caring, and very sweet and drop dead hot though. Is this enough to move on and leave him, or is it something I will get over? I just hate noticing when guys who are cute at work, flirt and talk to me, they are sooo interesting and talk about a wide range of topics.
2007-07-10 04:31:33 · 15 answers · asked by vada 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Communications is one of the most important ingredients in the recipe for a successful long-term relationship. Here's a couple of things for you to think about.
1. He loves you. You love him. Congratulations. Why do you love him? Is he the love of your life?
2. You talk and talk and talk. But when you talk, does you always say something new? I'm not trying to be rude, but some people like to fill their day with conversation. Others enjoy quiet companionship or just to listen. If you didn't talk for a day, would he start a conversation?
3. A complex convo for one person could be a simple convo for another since we all think at different speeds and levels. Quantum physics anyone?
4. Remember, when guys flirt with your and are sooo interesting and talk about a wide range of topics, you're comparing more than one person to just one person. You probably haven't spent nearly as much time with one of them as you have with your boyfriend.
Relationships take work. The more things people do and interests they have, the more they'll have to talk about. Growth comes from sharing not only common interests but uncommon ones as well. And if both people wanted to talk equally, who would listen?
Should you break up? Think about what I've said and listen to your heart.
Good luck.
2007-07-12 05:47:38 · answer #1 · answered by labmuttmix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually just be more patient, as true love takes time to develop. It needs to be explored and to be discovered. Do not rush into a relationship or into love to quickly. Take it slow and easy to know more about him.
If it is too long then I suggest you consider another boy friend. Its natural to compare with other boys but it is only the exterior that you see but you do not know his true personality yet.
Tell your self how you started off with this person and is he someone special to you.
By the way you are right to be selective and unsatisfied about him because you want the best from him and I know that you don't want to spend your life with a wrong person. It does not mean that the first or first few close relationships encountered are the best or will work out, though important decisions will have to be made and no turning back later on.
There are plenty of interesting people out there in this world.
Therefore, have faith and confidence in your judgment of seek advice from your parents, close friends, counselor or to pray to god for guidance.
Best regards,
Jeff.
2007-07-10 05:00:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They talk now because they are trying to get your interest.
And how else will they get your interest, if they don't talk?
No I really don't think you should leave him.
You really need to look at what you do have with him because that says alot.
Men really don't like to talk much.
So you're really gambling about finding someone else that will talk. Yea but maybe won't have all the other "good" characteristics as your boyfriend.
You need to talk to him about it.
Tell him how important this is to you.
If you get that point across, I'm sure he will work on it because he sounds like such a good guy.
Be lucky you have him.
Do you now how many girls wish they were in your shoes?
Don't expect him to change overnight.
But look for those moments when he is trying.
Then work on it from there.
Good luck
You found a good man, keep him ;)
2007-07-10 04:40:23 · answer #3 · answered by MommaBear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is not the man for you......... dotn move inot the new apt. you say he is HOT so what? that may make you overlook his problems. he says you rtalk too mcuh as a joke. thats sarcasm and that is anger masked as a joke. which eventrually turns to anger dump and run. it is enough tomove out. you wouldnt bwe asking and I hope you get the courage strenght etc you need. ther are other guys out there for you he osunds like a sicko I bet he has secrets he keeps from you if not yet he will...... take care hun and take care of yoursefl....... :)people dont change they just get worse in wahtver way they were sorry
2007-07-10 04:41:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't throw the guy out. Be thankful that you have a guy thats not out partying every night with different women never comming home. If you break up with him over something so little you might regret it for a long time. Here is a little saying to help you out----It could be worst.
2007-07-10 04:40:58 · answer #5 · answered by BRADY J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As an artist, you must be intellectually stimulated. All thinking women require this. Unfortunately, only about 5% of the male population in America can think beyond their zippers. If you stay long term with him, you risk dumbing yourself down. Why diminish your intellect for someone who is not your true match?
2007-07-10 04:36:46 · answer #6 · answered by 1954 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he has nothing to say or does not know what to talk about now. I hate talking on the phone but love to talk in person. Try to find a good topic to discuss and have at it, what are his interests and such?
2007-07-10 04:37:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just broke up with a guy I dated a year over this same thing. I haven't looked back since. Not that I have anything against quiet guys, but you are obviously not fulfilled in your relationship, so why stay in it?
2007-07-10 04:36:36 · answer #8 · answered by arzachel81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are so unsatisfied with your bf, then maybe you need to take a step back and look at the whole picture. he may be perfect in all other ways, but won't talk. try talking a break from the relationship to see if your better off with him or without him.
2007-07-10 04:38:30 · answer #9 · answered by Ms Berry Picker 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you love him and care, and if he is "the one", then you will have to find another outlet for your talking?
sometimes we have to overlook things about people... their bad habits, and little quirks....
if he's totally boring, and not spending quality time with you, well, that might be a big problem. you have to decide what you can live with and what you can't tolerate.
take care. i hope things work out.
2007-07-10 04:37:24 · answer #10 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋