Why does everyone ask my husband and I when we are going to have kids?

Question

First off, we don't want children and secondly even if we did I was told a few years ago that I would have trouble carrying a baby and I most likely couldn't carry a pregnancy full term. Not a big deal to me, I've never wanted children and neither has my husband. So how do I explain that to people without coming off as being rude (even though I think that they are asking me a rude/tacky question!)??

Answer 1

simply tell them that you have decided that until condtions improve in the world you do not want to bring a child into this world

Answer 2

I have had the same problem with people asking my fiance and I when we plan on starting a family. There is a strange societal view that a life without children is unfulfilling....which I find completely untrue. Unfortunately, being honest about not wanting kids and your medical condition will likely make the people asking feel like jackasses, so the better thing to do is to leave it open ended. Say something like "We're not sure" and then change the subject to something that is more comfortable to talk about.

Answer 3

I think most of the time, people are not trying to be rude (even tho the question is way too personal, unless you're very close friends family).

I don't think you need to explain anything. Just say straight out that you've decided you are not having kids -- or, if you prefer, just shrug! You don't owe anyone an explanation or any details about the "why."

Answer 4

The reason they are asking you is because they wonder. Just tell them that you were told that you wouldnt be able to carry a baby for the full term. And if they dont understand that then you can tell them that you dont really want kids.

Answer 5

dont go into detail as to why you dont want kids... My younger brother has been with this girl for almost 20 yrs..and finally married her but they didnt want kids either so thats a plus... besides they get to travel the world and not worry about leaving theyre offspring in a hotel alone to be kidnapped or something..Im sorry to hear you canna pull full term... but you have your health.. thats good for you.If it gets tooo tacky...then flat out say we DONT WANT children NOT now NOT ever..some of us know the situation as to why my brother doesnt want kids. he himself was abused as a child and he saw many vicious things happen to his friends on the rezz.and they have NO REGRETS.about not having children..Im happy for them..Im happy if you could tell tacky ppl to back off. good luck.

Answer 6

Sometimes people ask stuff like this when they're just trying to be friendly. There is this order to how life progresses, and now that you're married, people just assume that this will be the next step.

I think the best thing is to decide, right now, to speak with a sweet, pleasant tone and practice a few lines in your head just to prepare yourself. "We've decided that the world has enough children" or "We're going to focus on our careers instead" or "My sister's triplets/delinquent teenage son convinced me not to be a parent!" or "I'm not going to go through what my mom went through!"

Answer 7

arise with a diverse tale which you would be able to think of no person could have faith. such as you have been mountain mountaineering and a rock slipped and smacked you interior the face. or you are able to desire to apply some thing truly own like this is a freak twist of fate gained from truly tough intercourse to easily create an ungainly silence. of direction i'm kidding you are able to desire to by no ability lie and it may be much greater bizarre looks in case you instructed your friends the 2nd. the only way you may get human beings to surrender asking approximately this is by ability of attempting to make it to the place they cant see it. (sturdy makeup possibly?) you will desire your friends could be attentive to you and your husband sturdy sufficient to have faith he does not beat you. don't be imprecise approximately it, provide a greater powerful clarification of the toy you tripped over so possibly paint a greater powerful photograph of their head like I tripped over the crimson pony with pink hair, truly then the classic door that lots of girls human beings interior the movies have used.

Answer 8

You could say, rather pointedly but not rudely, "That's really our decision now, isn't it?" This should shut up the socially inept.

If they persist, answer any question with a "How interesting" and a pained smile, and change the conversation. Note that you are not answering their tacky questions.

Good luck!

Answer 9

Tell them the medical reason--that your doctors told you you couldn't carry a child to term. I realize this is a personal issue for you, and you don't owe them an explanation, but it'll make them feel like a heel and will definitely get them off your back.

Also, look as sad as possible when you tell them this. If you can, make tears well up in your eyes.

Answer 10

Be honest tell them that is a rude question, tell them that is very personal...put THEM on the spot. Say "Is that any business of yours?" or "I don't see how it is anyo f your business." They have no right to ask you a question that is so personal so you have no need to worry about sparing their feelings. Correct them as you would a young child as that is what they are acting like...

Answer 11

because some people think the only reason to get married is to have kids. Just tell them you're not ready. They don't need to know never!