My brother-in-law criticizes everyone except himself,how to stop him?

Question

It has been 25 years seeing my brother in law criticizing everyone except his wife (his wife is exactly like him) and children. He is very successful moneywise, but he has no manners at all. I have a college diploma and could not get a job, he would say in front of the whole world, "look at her, she has wasted her money going college for nothing". Anything I buy, he would say, "look at her, she is wasting her money". He talks about others in a same manner and would insult others. He always think, he is right, everyone is wrong.If anyone makes mistake, he would say, "I knew it, it would happen", or he would say, " see I told you". If he gives any favour to anyone, he would tell to the whole world. If he gives you a gift, he would tell you the price he paid.
Is there anyway to stop him?

Answer 1

This person is just as much a social; parasite as the vagabond is on the opposite side of the coin. This person is on the high side, seemingly looking down on others, altough this is only an illusion. He's not really any better than any one else, he just maked out like he is. Feeding off the misery of other around him who are just a little not as successiful as he is. If he were a beneficial person, he would serve as an encouragement to others in helping them to succeed as he has. Instead he uses his position to elavate himself into a position of self importance. Making other people feel miserable so that he can feed off of that misery & feel better & more self important. There's no stopping this persons destructive personality. Just get away from him. He lives in a glass house casting stones at others, & his foundation is layed on sinking sand. Someday, the storms will rise & the water will beat his house down to the ground to humble this miserable wretch. Let's hope that he hasn't completely alienated his family against him by then!

Answer 2

OK, so what!!He has money and he's very successful at his job,there isn't anybody and I mean nobody that don't have faults, as he likes to call them. I am sure if you look closer at him and his family you will see their faults and if by chance you don't, then you need not worry cause whatever he reaps with his mouth he shall sow sometime in his lifetime. I say this only because it's happening right now to my brother and his family who thought they had their stuff together and always liked to compare their family to everyone else's,and how great their lives were and their kids would be something great,no doubt.Don't get me wrong I love my nephews and my sister-in-law is actually my best friend,but now his youngest son is a alcoholic,and his older son is not much to brag about either,both are high school drop outs and both my brothers life and my sister-in-law's life right now is everything they always said it wouldn't be,their not even together anymore and the ones that they thought were beneath them, now stands out in comparison.This should give you hope and know that whatever you say in a boasting manner,or a demeaning manner toward someone will come back to bite you in the a**.......someday,and that's for real. If you can't hold off from saying something start pointing out his faults just make sure it's the truth and try not to get caught up in the hatred part of it all.

Answer 3

Well, first of all, stop listening to him. Don't give him an audience and act like you don't care what he thinks or what he says. He is obviously happy and made to feel superior only when he can put others down.

Your job or lack thereof is no one's business but your own. Therefore, I suggest not sharing more with him/his wife than saying Hello or Goodbye. This may be hard to do if you are in the habit of having conversations with him or in his presence.

I would stop worrying about what he says about others if it has no bearing upon what pertains to your situation. He is a toxic personality and I would find ways to stay away from him and his wife.

If they should ask why you make yourself scarce. Tell him/and his wife what you have told us and stand up for yourself. Some people will walk all over you like a door mat if you only let them. Please, don't be their doormat anymore!

Answer 4

What a jerk! Well, if it's been 25 years of this, it's hard to stop him now. I have many critical relatives myself. I can sympathize.

The first thing is to work on yourself. He's the one who should be embarrassed by his behavior, not you. You can't take responsibility for his actions, but you can take responsibility for your feelings and change them. Don't let this guy have control over you!

Learn phrases like, "That's your opinion," "I guess we'll have to agree to disagree," "That's another way of looking at it," and the ever-damning "Well, that's *interesting.*. They look polite, but aren't.

You can also try directness. Not meanness like his, *directness*: "I don't see why you have to be so rude." "You know, that really doesn't help me." "That really hurts!" He'll probably tell you you're overly sensitive and he's just truth-telling, but consider the source!

Learn to defend each other. Surely you're not the only one sick of this. Enough "She really doesn't deserve thats" and "He's just a kid, back offs" will lead to people defending you as well. He and his wife will feel outnumbered.

Lastly, seek out others' company at these reunions and such, and avoid him as much as possible. If he doesn't like other humans, why, let him have his wish and keep him away from other humans!

Answer 5

Next time he does this you say "oh there he goes again, just like clockwork with the mouth" hold a pad of paper and a pencil and mark each time he does this, add the total, and share with everyone including him at the end of the visit.

Can't make him stop, turn it into a game.

He sounds perfectly odious.

Answer 6

Thee is nothing you can do to stop him, but in time his mouth will. I would not borrow from him, or let him know my business. And no hard feeling, I would not be around him. As you well know, what gos around comes around, let him keep knowing everything and criticizing everyone, all of this will come back to bite him. Pray for him and give it time, stay cool and calm just weather the storm, there will.... come a change.

Answer 7

I 'love' generalizations. You assume ALL different halves criticize and attempt to strengthen their husbands. i think of marriage is a lot approximately gaining knowledge of to get alongside with, admire, and actually love the guy you're with. You strengthen and alter right into a greater powerful individual in case you paintings to make a loving marriage - criticizing your substantial different isn't the thank you to circulate in any respect. you are able to desire to alter your self in reality.

Answer 8

Best thing would be to ignore and spend as little time with them as possible. Offer them NO information as to what is going on in your life. Limit your time around these people, just be polite and nothing else. He feeds off of other people's misery. Don't give him the opportunity.

Answer 9

Well one day he'll say the wrong thing to someone and get a nice little beating from it i'd imagine... all you can do is what for that day to come and maybe it'll knock some sense into him, and just tell him to chill out and treat everyone like he would want to be treated.

Answer 10

Nobody is perfect. Make fun of him mercilessly. Get your friends and family to join in. That will calm him down after a while.