Our relationships was about 4 weeks when we first slept together. I had gone to visit him, & things led to another and we started kissing. It lasts so long & got so heated that i agreed to sleep with him although i'd told him i wanted sex delayed till i was emotionally ready for it. After wards, i lamented about my lack of restrain, & worried he'd lose respect for me. he told me it didn't matter to him if i slept with him or not, that it wouldn't change what he thinks of me. But the next time he came to my place & was going to stay the night, i saw that he'd brought along 2 condoms. I feel he was lying when he said it doesn't matter to him abt sex. & am angry he's not making any effort to abstain from it. What do you guys think?
2007-07-10 02:19:49 · 39 answers · asked by Hmmm 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you did it once, I understand why he would show up with condoms the next time. You need to talk to him again to let him know you really want to wait for a while
2007-07-10 02:23:26 · answer #1 · answered by finsoholic 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that means anything. Guys will be guys. At least he's thinking about safe sex. Just because he brought the condoms doesn't mean he wanted to force sex on you. He probably would have been just as happy to not have sex, but he was prepared just in case.
If he seems upset when you don't have sex, then I would say there's a problem. Don't be angry at him yet.
2007-07-10 02:25:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends. Was he pressuring you for sex, or did he just bring the condoms? If he just brought them along it may have been a "just in case" thing. Doesn't necessarily mean he expected it. Also, some guys carry them with them all the time. If you want him to stop trying entirely, you have to tell him that. From what you've said, you sound like you're confused about whether or not to do it. If that's NOT the case you have to make it very clear to him. I admire your efforts to avoid jumping in bed with him immediately. But you have to understand that even if he is willing to wait for you, he still WANTS to have sex with you and can't be expected to actively avoid it unless you ask him to.
2007-07-10 02:26:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly, if you let a guy stay the night, he's probably thinking he's going to get some. i know if i stayed at a guy's house that's what i would think to. you're giving him mixed messages. if you want to hold off on sex, then try not being in a situation conducive to it. you can't be mad at him for not trying to abstain when you let him stay the night. what do you expect? you've already had sex with him so don't be an indian giver. and if you really don't want to have sex yet, tell him that and if he can't respect that, then get a boyfriend who shares the same views on sex as you do. it's that simple.
2007-07-10 02:25:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well there are two ways he could have been thinking and the first is just he had the thought if things started to go as they did the last time then he thought he would bring protection the next is your right he is thinking about a way to get in your pants but i think most guys always think about it and maybe at only 4 weks of dating he shouldn't be staying the night at your house if your not going to be having sex .
2007-07-10 02:25:15 · answer #5 · answered by sara b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would applaude the guy who comes prepared! Just the fact that u never know what might happen is the reason why hes prepared all the time. He would have brought those 2 condoms even if your legs were clenched & u werent giving anything up. He wouldnt have used them, but he would have had them just in case. Very mature of him, most guys try talk u out of using protection! -Nay
2007-07-10 02:25:13 · answer #6 · answered by Nay Nay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u wanted things to get more "emotional" u shouldn't have slept with him so soon. Relationships tend not to last if u give it up too soon. Thats how u tell a serious relationship apart from just messing around. He won't want the serious and emotional side if he can get the sex without it.
2007-07-10 02:24:31 · answer #7 · answered by Kristy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if you slept with him last time and he came to stay the night with you then he was being very responsible bringing condoms. He's abstaining for your sake, not his so why should he 'make the effort'? He's just being careful and clearly rightly so as you already slept with him!
2007-07-10 02:24:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not be angry, be glad that he came with condoms, he sensed that you were uncomfortable the first time, so the second time he wanted to make it easier on you by bringing the condoms and easing your mind, you do not want to become parents yet, do you?
Be thankful there is a guy out there who is taking precautions for you and himself, he wants you, not the responsibility of children!
2007-07-10 02:27:16 · answer #9 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've already slept with him so why would he think you don't want to do it agian.. was it that bad? You shouldn't be mad at him because he brought condoms. WHat would he have done if you'd wanted to have sex and he didn't have one. It was probably a just in case kind of thing.
2007-07-10 02:24:13 · answer #10 · answered by Jane ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋