why do people expect there to be a dance and open bar at weddings?

Question

i recently posted a question asking for ideas at the reception other than a dance because my family and friends are into that kinda thing.

all i got for answer were think about your guests and what they want. why does everyone expect to have a huge party? i thought this day was about my fiance and i???

Answer 1

I'm honestly not sure why myself.

I've been to tons of wedding, if I had to guess I'd say about 40 of them. Some family, mostly friends. I've never once gone to a wedding with dancing or a bar. The closest was a friend who, after the recpetion, had a seperate party with a keg. But I never go to a wedding expecting a bar or dancing because that's just not the norm in my area at all. My wedding had both, & was the first wedding for everyone there which had a bar & dancing. I think a date of a cousin went to a wedding previously that had dancing. That was it. Different areas have different norms I guess, but the majority of weddings in my area are in churches & then the receptions are in church halls, none of which allow drinking & don't really have room for dancing if you wanted to.

It's your family & friends, you know what they don't & do enjoy. Do what's best for you & those invovled in your wedding. Good luck.

Answer 2

I truly have by no ability been to a marriage with a money bar and heard every physique say something undesirable approximately it. of direction my acquaintances and family individuals are not the wealthiest human beings interior the international. in reality I stumble upon the alternative, we are very extremely joyful whilst there is an open bar in spite of the undeniable fact that this is not any meditated photograph on the bride and groom whilst there is not any longer. this is barely assumed they don't have the money for it. I desire a money bar over no bar in any respect. And so do most of the individuals i be attentive to. do no longer subject approximately what expensive Abby says, those etiquette books say dissimilar old issues like the Bride's mothers and dads pay for the marriage, the couple does not stay jointly first and each sort of different issues that don't stick to anymore. believe me, no person will care.

Answer 3

I refused to have drinking at my wedding. I was only 18 and my husband was 21. I didn't care I didn't want it and its MY day so there was none. People said poeple wouldn't show up well bull because they did show up and no one said a thing or question why is wasn't there. People expect it because its called a wedding and they assume there wil be free food and booze if they show up with a gift!
At my wedding we did have dancing but because I wanted it you know? At the reception we had a nice meal with cake and punch and a chocolate fountain and music in the background. Then we went outside and danced on the dance floor. It didn't last as long as I thought it would but me and my new husband were eager to get alone anyways lol so we were happy! <3
Its YOUR day...........and your fiance's kinda hahahaha do whatever YOU want if somebody doesn't like it they can go home and think of it this way the more people who leave quicker the quicker you can start your honey moon!
Best of luck!
And congrats on getting engaged!
~Sarah~

Answer 4

I think weddings have changed these days, couples do all sorts of things now.
Do what you want to do, if it doesn't suit all guests then so be it! It's your special day to remember, if it's going to be something obscure that may not suit say elderly guests you could have a quiet word before the wedding and maybe have a special meal with them at a later date and maybe even have some photo's taken in your wedding clothes with them just before the ceremony.

A dance and a party is just a tradition, it doesn't mean you have to do it too.

Answer 5

People expect a party, because that's what over 90% of people do. You don't want to do it, but you don't have a better idea so don't criticize everyone who says have the party. You are under the mistaken impression that your wedding is just about you and your fiance. That's true of the marriage, but not the wedding. The wedding, whether you like it or not, is about everybody invited.

Answer 6

Ah, you were starting from a false premise! The day is NOT only about the two of you - weddings are for families and friends to witness your vows at the ceremony and for you to host a reception for your guests to celebrate your union as a married couple.
It's different if ALL your friends and family don't dance and don't drink. Then, there is nothing wrong with having a dry wedding and after supper to plan something else. You could have a kaiser or whist tournament, and I'm not sure what else... I've been to about 20 weddings, all with dances...

Answer 7

Why do people expect a party? Well, mostly because you're supposed to be having a party to celebrate your marriage! That's what a wedding reception is. Just because you're not having drinks or dancing doesn't mean it's not a party...you just need to arrange other "entertainment".

I don't know about your friends & family, but most folks enjoy mingling...often this works better with a cocktail or two, but it's by no means a requirement!

Answer 8

The wedding is about your and your fiance but you also want your friends and family to have a great time right? It doesn't mean you have to have a huge party. Just some good music and great food will make them happy. My upcoming wedding I feel is for me and my fiance but also a day where I can celebrate this special even with my great family and close friends and so I do want them to be happy and have a great time celebrating with us.

Answer 9

I think I always expect a dance at weddings, because typically every wedding I've gone to has dancing. If you don't want dancing, maybe to a cocktail reception. Also, open bars to me are not typical at weddings. Some people have them, but they can be very costly especially if your state doesn't allow outside booze to be brought in. Anyway good luck and congrats!

Answer 10

the reception is traditionally thrown by the brides parents in honor of them. the party is not all about just the two newly weds. its a party for friends and family. kind of like a thank you for coming, heres some food, dancing and drinks. ive been to too many weddings where the bride and groom party hard, get drunk and then dont even make love on their wedding night. its so wrong. the party is for everyone else to have a good time.