There was no ring invoved, and it wasn't your usual "will you marry me". He said that he wants us to get married and that we need to start planning right away, he asked if it would be okay. I was overwhelmed (with happiness) and said of course! Is it considered a proposal, though maybe not the ordinary sort? We've started doing simple planning things (ie: discussing what kind of wedding, who will be involved, how much we want to spend, a date). Am I engaged or am I just planning a wedding and waiting for a proposal? Thanks in advance for your opinions.
Oh, and by the way... the no ring thing isn't an issue for me. I've always wanted a spontaneous proposal... with or without a ring, I think that can come later if the current moment feels perfect.
2007-07-09 06:00:42 · 22 answers · asked by ♥Infatuation 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Just wanted to say that I totally agree with MKC! The ring is not what's important, the fact that he wants that for our future is! I could care less about a hunk of rock, as long as I have him that's all that matters. (some of my girlfriends think otherwise)
2007-07-09 06:10:38 · update #1
I thought I should share this also... I already have a ring, I guess a "Promise Ring". He gave it to me about a year ago. I also got him a ring 2 years ago for Christmas... people always ask if we are engaged... if we wanted to couldn't we say yes, and that the rings we already have work for us?
2007-07-09 06:22:04 · update #2
When did I say that I CAN'T ask him? Everyone is assuming that I'm not going to ask. I'm just wondering and it happens to be at at time where he is busy and we can't talk... so I thought I would get some opinions... isn't that what yahoo! ANSWERS is for?
2007-07-09 07:03:50 · update #3
Of course you're engaged. You've agreed to marry him and are planning a wedding. Whether you have a ring now or not changes nothing in that.
For the record, my husband's proposal to me wasn't too far off from what yours was. Some guys just put things their own way. As odd as the moment was, I wouldn't change it for any other in the world. It was just so...him. The words 'will you marry me?' never passed his lips. Instead, he mentioned a date eighteen months or so away was a sunday. When I asked him why that was important, he said he thought we could get married that day.
We've been married for fourteen years now, so I'm guessing that more traditional proposal isn't going to happen...and that's just fine with me.
I wish you and your fiance all possible joy in life. It sounds as though you're well matched.
2007-07-09 06:21:24 · answer #1 · answered by gileswench 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is. However, you MUST have a date. I didn't get a ring with my proposal, got it a few weeks later. I wasn't after the 'bling' either, but it's a tradition to have that symbol of the promise to be wed. My mom always said one wasn't officially engaged until there was a ring and a date... and this wasn't for stuffy reasons or anything -- but because both together showed the commitment.
Good luck!
2007-07-09 09:35:37 · answer #2 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well personally I think a ring is important, it shows that he is serious about getting married, I mean I don't think he had to go all out on a huge diamond, but he should at least get you a band..... Personally I think if he didn't ask you to marry him, then NO your not engaged... I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I think your BF should step up..... I can undertand that your happy and think that he is great for wanting to start planning your guys wedding, but the truth is every girl deserves a proposal and he totaly skipped it, you should be kinda bugged that he didn't put enough thought into it to make is special for you.... I mean look you don't even know if your engaged or not....... that's not cool, talk to your BF and I would let him know that a proposal is special and that you deserve one.
2007-07-09 06:15:50 · answer #3 · answered by totallylovableandinlove 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just depends on your definition of proposal. I was "engaged" to my preacher's son for awhile and he proposed this same way. We, thankfully, didn't end up getting married. I'm married now to the love of my life. He did propose with a ring. So, it's really what you're comfortable with and if that's what you wanna call it, then call it that. I don't think a ring has always been used in proposals.
We don't use rings in business proposals...LOL! Good Luck!
2007-07-09 06:06:30 · answer #4 · answered by Kellybug 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think you need a ring. You can say the two of you are engaged all day. But, doesn't mean other people will take this proposal seriously. I know my parents are old fashioned. If I came home and said my boyfriend proposed and we are going to get married next summer, my mom would tell me see would need to see a ring.
A ring tells the world you two are seriously committed to one another.
I'm sorry, I'm not materialistic. But, for traditional purposes, you need a ring. Even if it's a small one. The ring is the man telling the world that you are his.
2007-07-09 06:08:39 · answer #5 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
It sounds like one to me. My husband of 33 + years asked, "Would you like to spend the rest of our lives together?" I couldn't speak, so I just nodded. That was our proposal and response. I was not expecting a ring, so I was very surprised three weeks later when he put one on my finger. The ring is not what is important. The right person is.
2007-07-09 06:07:28 · answer #6 · answered by MKC 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think you should be asking him that question, not us. Make sure he is serious, and be clear on your questions, "I don't want to waste time planning a wedding if it's not going to happen..." etc...
Like you said, the ring isn't a big deal. But you might want to have a serious talk with him anyways.
2007-07-09 06:07:21 · answer #7 · answered by Hillary1034 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a proposal way to go ( : you can find a lot of things that you need to do on brides.com, it provides you w time line of things that need to be done before the wedding. COngrats!
2007-07-09 06:05:21 · answer #8 · answered by happily married ( : 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Though a bit strange, it sounds like a proposal.
You could have said "is this a marriage proposal?" just to be sure.
If that is his usual attitude, then consider yourself engaged!
Congrats!
2007-07-09 07:39:49 · answer #9 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he didn't really ask you, it wasn't a "proposal". Sounds to me like he just sort of told you that you were going to get married. This doesn't mean that you aren't engaged, though....If you've got a date (that you both know about) and are beginning to spend money, you're engaged.
if you are really unsure...just ask him! if you are going to marry this guy, you should be comfortable enough in your relationship to ask him this question.
2007-07-09 06:08:17 · answer #10 · answered by jennyvee 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋