You know, getting up in the middle of the night, changing diapers, buying baby clothes, milk, saving for college. That's right, having a baby. Now why would I want to ruin my life like that? I actually want a life. I want to come home from work and school, shower, cook if I want and if I don't want, then I don't have to. I can get a full night's sleep and not have to care for anyone but myself. I mean, I'm in my early twenties. I can find something better to do than make babies. I don't want kids. They are just a waste of time to me. I want to enjoy my life, not let a baby take it. Why are people that don't want marriage and kids considered selfish? If you want those headaches, be my guest. Not for me though. I actually want a life.
2007-07-09 05:24:26 · 19 answers · asked by hotboy 225 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Why is Octavia 127 stalking me? Is she a yahoo answers stalker or something?
2007-07-09 05:36:18 · update #1
Octavia 127, I just posted another question, and you answered it too. Don't you have anything better to do, like a job or something?
2007-07-09 15:47:39 · update #2
Personally, with over 6 BILLION people on the planet I feel the ones who have kids are the selfish ones - especially if they have more than 1 kid (I had tubes tied after 1 kid).
the population is the one threat to our contined existance that we as individials can controll...
the United Nations has warned that this will be our undoing...
people who contribute to the problem by pumping out 2 or more kids are being selfish not even thinking of what the future will be like for their own kids...
you are not being selfish you are being responsible..
2007-07-09 05:30:05 · answer #1 · answered by CF_ 7 · 2⤊ 10⤋
Your decision may change once you are done with school and have settled down. People are having kids in there 30s and 40s now so who knows by then you may be married and be ready. A child is a beautiful thing and most people just have them and dont take care of them. At least you are thinking LOGICAL and not just popping one out not being ready. I hope one day you can enjoy a child or two...
*EDIT*
I do have a life. My life is my kids... I go to school and come home and take care of them. This is the most exciting time of my life and I am only 22. My son looks at me (he is 7 mon) and says Momma and he says DaDa. It is rather funny all the stuff my 3 year old says to me... Especially when it comes to body parts and what they are called... She says she has a Bongo and Pirate... Now tell me waking up and your daughter or son saying that stuff wouldnt make you laugh... There are some people who are not cut out to be parents, and there are others who have 15 kids(not me 2 is enough) But kids change your life, and they changed mine for the better.
2007-07-09 12:31:52 · answer #2 · answered by Megan Michelle 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Why do you think you have to justify yourself if you really don't want children, fine then don't have them I'm not offended by that it's your personal decision. Nor would I want to talk someone into having a child that doesn't want one. Children need love unconditionally and people who have children they don't want can't provide the love for that child like people who have children and want that child. Having a child takes a type of parent mode, you obviously lack that and if your in your early twenties then your too young anyway to think about it. You have plenty of time to decide whether you want a family with children or to stay a dried up career woman focusing on your own needs and problems convincing everyone that children aren't for everyone.
2007-07-09 14:08:59 · answer #3 · answered by mombean1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think people like you are selfish - you just don't want kids. Plain and simple. They're not for everyone and who knows, when you're older and find the right person you may change your mind but make sure you discuss your preferences once things get serious so as to avoid problems down the road. Enjoy your child-free life.
2007-07-09 12:41:27 · answer #4 · answered by thejezowskis 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are being selfish at all. I have always wanted children and wouldn't trade my little boy for anything in the world, but that's not always the case with some people. Not everyone is cut out to have kids and then there are those that just plain have no desire to have them. In my opinion, it is better for those people not to have them than to have them and not love them like they deserve to be loved.
Just remember to take the necessary precautions to avoid having children if you don't want them.
2007-07-09 15:28:58 · answer #5 · answered by "Urban" 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay, first, people with babies have lives. they just have to switch their priorities a bit and care about the baby before themself.
second, its fine that you dont want to have kids, because you dont seem like you would be a good parent anyways.
third, if or when you get out of college, get a career, fall in love, and get married, you might change your mind. maybe its not right for you yet.
everyone should be out on their own, go to college, take care of only themselves first before they decide to have children, so that they will have gotten to have the freedom to do what they want, as you have described.
i think its fine that you dont want to be a parent, at least not yet.
2007-07-09 12:34:01 · answer #6 · answered by Mo 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't think people who don't want children are selfish. My brother who is in his late 20s has never wanted to be married or have children. He has a girlfriend who is of the same mindset and they protect themselves well so that there hopefully will be no OOPS babies! I think it would be selfish and hypocritical of you if you didn't protect yourself and ended up bringing a child into the world you didn't want though.
2007-07-09 13:30:07 · answer #7 · answered by girlzmommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's completely fine to not want children, and a responsible decision to not have children if you don't want to. There are some who have children unthinkingly because it's what they are "supposed to do" and that's not fair to the children. Nor is it fair of society to make people feel like they have to have children. There is a support group you can check out for people who have to deal with the social stigma of not having children called Childless By Choice.
However, I find your attitude judgemental of those who do want children. Maybe what people are responding to is not the fact that you don't want children, but your dogmatic way of talking about it. You imply that children "ruin" people's lives, or that people who have kids don't have a life. Maybe people who have children are responding to you being judgemental of them. Try being more accepting of others choices and maybe they will be more accepting of yours.
2007-07-09 12:39:35 · answer #8 · answered by Erin L 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My advice for you is to find a girl that doesnt want kids also. Use protection and take precautions if you dont want kids. Otherwise you are being selfish if you dont use protection.
If an unwanted pregnancy occurs the responsibility falls on you. If you dont want children you shouldnt have sex at all because you can always have a mishap.
2007-07-09 12:31:13 · answer #9 · answered by pegasis 5 · 6⤊ 0⤋
You don't sound like you're ready for kids so you shouldn't have any. At least you're aware of it and can take steps to prevent conceiving a child. Which, by the way, ought to be total abstinence, since birth control fails and you are so adament about not having kids.
But be sensible about it. You may feel quite differently in your late twenties or sometime in your thirties. Never say never.
P.S. Kids aren't as much of a "headache" as you think they are. They give you back more than they take from you.
2007-07-09 12:32:50 · answer #10 · answered by sparki777 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
This is why they make birth control in varying forms (temporary and permanent). Some people just dont want to be parents. That isnt selfish. If someone is saying that, then they may just be reflecting on their own joys of parenthood and not remember that not everyone feels the way they do.
2007-07-09 12:28:35 · answer #11 · answered by ? 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋