I feel very disapponted and hurt, but most of al confuse, because I just found that my husband read pornographic magazines, wich make me feel that Im not women enough or god enough for him. I feel very hurt because even when I'm not as young an pretty as I used to, I still feel that I was pretty, Im 28yr and he is 35yr, we have sex 1 or 2 per day, I have lots of sexy lingery from Victoria Secret, etc. I do belly dance and use cupDD and I'm size M, I know I'm not thin but definetely I'm not ebesse or ugly, still it seems is not enough to him. I'm feeling miserable, what else can I do? I have tryed to keep this marriage interesting for both, Im a very creative person and never feel or sex life was bad, he even say often that is soo good, but still, why is he doing this to me, I'm realle hurt, I don't even want to see his face, really feel that he cheat on me on some way. am I wrong? what to do?
2007-07-08 18:55:35 · 17 answers · asked by desperatehwife07 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's quite normal for a guy to be into pornography, especially mags, don't worry unless it's in the realms of obsessive (e.g. he has a few subscriptions!).
2007-07-08 19:00:22 · answer #1 · answered by philby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well its not that bad and he isnt cheatiing Just want to look at stuff. No harm its not like he is going out and having an affair. Its just a natural thing to want to look and see. That is why the magazines and internet has been so much a moneymaker. Also sometimes in the articles written give some good advice and have interesting stories.
Do you read magazines that have sexy stuff in it. Interesting articles and surveys. How to do this or that.
2007-07-08 19:01:34 · answer #2 · answered by curious6710 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most men occasionally look at that sort of thing. It's very normal. He isn't cheating on you by looking at pictures or even videos. Cheating has to be with a person in real life. I guess you could argue emotional cheating is possible online.
Sometimes I look at porn just to compare them to my wife. I often find something about my wife that I like better than the porn. Sometimes it helps reinforce how much I love my wife.
You should talk to him about it, but try to get it out in the open. Right now he probably feels like he has to sneak around. This sneaking will cause more pain than the actual viewing of porn. You get into trust issues.
It sounds like your sex life is OK. You have sex more often than I do at 28.
2007-07-08 19:02:54 · answer #3 · answered by Lucas H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'm going to be nice and not go through pointing out all your typos/spelling mistakes, but I'd highly recommend you use the Check Spelling button in future questions.
As for your actually question, some guys read those magazines, it's not necessarily because they feel their wife/girlfriend isn't good enough, and the truth is they probably aren't comparing them to you or the other way around. Sometimes guys just enjoy seeing the pictures.
But beyond that, the best advice I can give you is to talk to him about it. Let him know that it bothers you and ask him if there's something he feels is missing, something he'd like you to differently, and try to see this as a way for you both to grow closer instead of it being something to divide your marriage.
2007-07-08 19:02:13 · answer #4 · answered by Xeno 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Wow! you just don't know how good you got it girl. If you are having sex 1 or 2 times a day, then you must be a turn on to your man. Porn is not that bad of a thing you know? it is only pictures, Maybe you should try and watch them with him, and you may learn that you can enjoy them together. Don't look at porn like he is having sex with another woman, he is having sex with you and you apparanlty turn him on just the way you are or he wouldnt tell you what he does. Your worrying about something that is natural in most men. don't let it cause you problems sexually. enjoy what you got,
2007-07-08 19:41:54 · answer #5 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of this over your husband reading pornographic literature? You are making far too much out of this. So the man likes to look at books. If he isn't out getting another woman in bed, then I would say for you to forget it. Also if you two are having sex 1-2 times per day...Hell he hasn't any time or stamina left for another woman! Just let it go as it isn't hurting you or your marriage.
2007-07-08 19:03:13 · answer #6 · answered by pappysgotitgoinon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you taking it so personally? Obviously you have self esteem issues you need to go to counseling and work it out. All guys look at porn in some form, whether it's beer commercials and cheerleaders, sex scenes in almost every movie (they're not there for the women) or magazines and movies, or on the internet. They're very visual and they like it. Get over it.
2007-07-08 18:59:23 · answer #7 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wel i can feel that you are really hurt but let me tel you one thing always except the unexcepted from every one even if he is your husband or lover or what ever so this will not coz you any hurt or bad feeling once you know it
but as for the porno i think it is no big deal if he has told you that he is watchign that one maybe it is time for you to start watching it with him as well you knw why every thing that we are doing as sceret has it's own test and it feels so good but once every one or any one knows about your little sceret and doesn't mind it or see it with you then you will just give it up and take it like normal so try to have a heart stronger then stone and make your way out after all you are still young and if feel you love your man try this one i believe it is worth trying
good luck
2007-07-08 19:08:58 · answer #8 · answered by Kamilia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its our way out..... its not that you are not good enough for him, he is not board he is just a guy..... most all guys look at some sort of porno......
its not that he is uninterested in you, its just that guys are curious....... we like the idea of new things, but always know that we have a good girl back at home....
and if you have that much sex, trust me, there is no way he is not satisfied...
and if you have a proablem with it, talk to him about it, I;m sure he can explain it better than I can. Some couples even like to read, or watch these things together, it makes things different, but still the same...
2007-07-08 19:02:09 · answer #9 · answered by janitorc7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its very difficult for men to be faithful to one person . even though many are, its an uphill battle , thats just the way men are programmed.
The fact that hes reading porn may be a good thing in a way as hes not letting his fantasy stray from the page, but i asssure it usually has nothing to do with his partner he no doubt does love you.
I know its difficult to comprehend but our minds do work differently (men , mars Women, Venus etc)
2007-07-08 19:04:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my goodness hun dont take it that way. just because he was looking at a stupid thing like that does not mean he loves you any less or that your not as attractive as the girls in the magazine. dont forget most of the girls in the magazine are air brushed any how. i think about 85% of men check those magazines out. Its just something they do. married or not married they all want to know whats in that stupid magazine. if anything make him feel wired by pulling it out and making him check it out with you
2007-07-08 19:03:23 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋