Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 6 months and love eachother a lot. We share everything and are very close. He even knows my yahoo pass and all my family problems and etc etc he knows EVERYTHING. so todya he spent the day writing up his personal statement for admissions to med school (its just like wiritng an essay to get into college). when i asked him to let me see it bc it matters to me too -- he said no, and that he wanted his privacy. he said it was too embarassing and insists that im just invading his privacy. i told him that i love him and that there shouldnt be anything to be be embarrased about or hide, nor should there be a line between us, but he holds firm on his decision. ive been crying a lot and bah -- i just feel like maybe were not as close as i thought? he says hes like this with everyone but im not "everyone"
is he right? and what should i do? and how should i feel?
2007-07-08 17:19:51 · 11 answers · asked by sarahstaples789 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if he says its privatr then thats just how it is. sorry.
just because he loves you and you love him doesn't mean he has to share EVERYTHING with you. people need their space even after they are married.
don't take it so personal it is healthy to have things that are just for him. choose your battles! obviously there is othing bad or about you in this letter so just let it be.
2007-07-08 17:24:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first thing is to forgive yourself. It's ok. Then forgive him.
Guys do like privacy and will hold some stuff back.
Is it really worth fighting over? I'd say let it go and move on.
The way to become closer is to work on the issues that divide you both.
I'd say to not really worry about it, but at the same time let him know how hurt you felt, that you thought that he couldn't trust you.
Sometimes, it's better to let things slide. It was personal and I think that if you can respect that, he'll respect you more also.
One day, when he feels confident in your relationship he might just tell you what was in the application.
To be honest though, is it really that important that you know what it was?
Is it worth losing a boyfriend over?
I don't think so. But people have a habit of making these things bigger than what they are.
2007-07-08 19:06:19 · answer #2 · answered by shane_lockwood 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think there are some things couples don't necessarily need to talk about, as long as they're things that don't jeopardize the relationship... if they do, then you definitely need to talk about them.
Give him that space, don't feel bad about it... an essay is not something that should cause a problem in a relationship. Not sharing everything doesn't mean you're not as close as you thought, just means you guys, even though you're in a relationship, are still "individuals". Don't press him... who knows? Maybe one day he'll take the initiative and share it with you.
2007-07-08 17:32:56 · answer #3 · answered by jomanuel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just give him some privacy if he asks for it. There are gonna be some issues that many people don't really don't feel like sharing with other people. Im sure down the line, theres gonna be something you really don't feel like sharing and all you want is support. So put yourself in his shoes and just show him your love by giving your support and move on. good luck with everything
2007-07-08 17:30:19 · answer #4 · answered by Aiea Joe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
6 months? That's it? That hardly constitutes an acquaintance much-less an in love relationship. It's pretty obvious that there are some things that he doesn't want you to know. You can be very close but do not have to share every aspect of your life. Maybe he is saving you some heartache, maybe it's something that you think you want to know but you really don't. I don't think there is anything you can do. No one on yahoo answers can tell you how you should feel.
2007-07-08 17:30:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give it time. Guy's are very reluctant to show their feelings and reveal their thoughts which is a total contradiction to the female way of relating. It sucks I'm sure for you gals but it is just the way we are wired. Don't take it personal. How the human race survived this long I'll never know.
2007-07-08 17:27:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
All couples do fight. It's part of life. You don't want to know every single thing. Let him run his own business. It does not make you two less closer.
2007-07-08 17:34:29 · answer #7 · answered by Mattman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he has alot on his mind and the college thing is a big career move for him and you just was at the wrong spot at the wrong time so maybe give him space and time and see what happens...but what do i know....
2007-07-08 17:27:09 · answer #8 · answered by Empty_Glass 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm that is kinda odd that he wouldnt let you see that since its nothing bad and either a real good story and experience to convince them to let him in or something he totally made up so that might be why he doesnt want you reading it cause he could of made up something about you in it or somethin to give him a better chance of getting in but still thats no exception for letting you not see it
2007-07-08 17:23:34 · answer #9 · answered by crazysk8tr15 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ya you should give him space... people we revel what they can in do time. Be patient with him it's only been 6 months so you are still in the trust stage
2007-07-08 17:24:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋