I have a sister that refuses to speak / see /or receive christmas gifts from me. She even back a gift unopened when I sent it to her.
2007-07-08 11:25:05 · 28 answers · asked by Al Shaitan 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
jackdinah, the thing that concerns you most is that she refused the free gift? Typical mormon.
2007-07-08 18:08:45 · update #1
I'm sure you've been identified as a sinful, bitter, hate-filled mormon basher who probably dispatched a family member or two to the promised land, right here on Yahoo. In fact we know exactly who they are, and you know where they're coming from. They are acting out of Love, as they would have you believe.
This is the sentiment that permeates thruout mormon society; some do it as 'punishment' for your sins, others act out of pressure from the morg not to associate with apostates, even if within their family. Those who value their family unity over the rantings of senile apostles are few and far between.
Keep sending your sister gifts and letters, and keep the higher moral ground.
2007-07-08 13:29:01 · answer #1 · answered by Dances with Poultry 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Sorry to hear your sister is acting this way.. Sounds to me there are problems between you 2 that go farther than your religious choices.. If you honestly don't know what the problem is try asking in a letter or asking another family member who may know..
Sometimes hurts in families can go very deep and what didn't mean much to one person means a lot to another.. Try to open the lines of communication with her so you will know for sure what her reasoning is... If that fails you may need to decide you have tried your best and move on..
I was raised in a mormon family (I am the only non-member non-believer in the whole family, I am Atheist) My family has neither shunned me nor stopped contact.. I did have a cousin who wouldn't talk to me at family gatherings for a few years after I told the family of my decisions.. After several letters and asking my mother to talk with her I learned she was angry because she felt I thought she was stupid and simple for believing... I thought nothing of the sort and we were able to talk it out and are now as close as ever..
Give it a try maybe there is an underlaying problem that you and your sister can talk out... And if not talk out maybe you can at least learn what it is so you can accept it as your sisters feeling and therefore important and valid to her..
2007-07-08 18:46:28 · answer #2 · answered by Diane (PFLAG) 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
By the time this appears, there may be more than the first 3 answers, which are idiotic.
Even so, as a Catholic living in Salt Lake City (the "Mormon Vatican"), I can't let their answers or your question just pass.
Either your sister is mentally ill, or she's still hurting greatly, or you've done a lot more than just leave "the Church." This is not what any Mormon I know of believes her faith requires of her--outside of the officially-not-Mormon polygamist cults in Utah and points mostly south, which ARE cults controlled by a dictator or tiny oligarchy, and which are REALLY big on shunning.
If it's the middle reason--she's still hurting--find out who her Bishop is and talk to him, or to one or more of her best friends, and have them try to get her to apply the Mormon doctrine of forgiveness. I understand they're even bigger on this than Catholics are, or Ann Landers was; you would know better about this than I do.
If your sister is mentally ill, her refusing your gifts is the least of it.
If you've done something unforgivably evil in her eyes, you can either try to make amends or not, depending on whether YOU think it's evil and whether it matters much to you.
P.S. If I'd known that SOME of the additional answers would be rational and helpful, I wouldn't have bothered with the above. They say ALMOST all of what I've said better than I have.
2007-07-08 18:40:33 · answer #3 · answered by georgetslc 7 · 5⤊ 2⤋
Mormons are taught NOT to shun other people.
I personally think it probably a problem between you and her and not because you are an ex mormon and I guess she is an active Mormon.
On Yahoo Answers I have many many many questions where "Christians" shun Mormons. Where "Christian" family members shun Mormon family members. Is this right.
It is wrong for any religion to shun others.
She must be a little crazy to give up a free gift.
2007-07-09 01:02:06 · answer #4 · answered by J T 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I would imagine that when you became an "ex-mormon" you did one or both of the following:
1) Said things to your family, including your sister to justify your position that she took personally. She needs to work through it, forgive, and ask you to forgive her for her bad attitude.
or 2) Started to live your life in ways that she would find to be sinful. I could then see that she might be thinking that she is protecting herself and or her kids from your "evil influence". However, she still needs to realize that cutting you off is hurtful and not Christ-like.
Either way, try to communicate to her that she is still your sister, and that you love her as such. Keep going to family gatherings. Hopefully she will eventually come around to seeing that, despite the differences in religious ideals, that you still have a lot in common and that you are still a good person at heart and that she will value her relationship with you.
I hope this helps!
2007-07-08 18:39:38 · answer #5 · answered by math guy 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
If you are anti-Mormon in front of her that may be why she will not talk to you. She may be afraid that you will try to turn her away from her beliefs. Just write her a letter and let her know that you love her no matter what she believes.
2007-07-08 18:38:35 · answer #6 · answered by Calico L 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Most Mormons aren’t as obvious about it as your sister, but apostates are looked down upon, most Mormons do not consciously catch themselves looking down on them, but they constantly do it subconsciously.
I think there is this idea in there heads that says if someone leaves, than it is because they have either sinned, got offended, or else were to stupid to see how Mormonism is obviously the one true religion despite all that Jeff Lindsey has written.
2007-07-08 18:38:54 · answer #7 · answered by . 3 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Mormons sin too. Yes it is bad for her to shun you. I hope you to can reconcile soon.
My brother left the church and we love each other, we just don't believe the same things anymore.
Love should not depend on ones beliefs, religion, skin color, political affiliation, etc.
Again my heart goes out to you and your sister.
Good luck
D
2007-07-08 21:19:28 · answer #8 · answered by Dionysus 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
This is an unfortunate response. Perhaps they think it will shock the person back, but it is not a good idea, nor is it supported by the church.
2007-07-09 09:48:09 · answer #9 · answered by je_apostrophe 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend that is an ex-catholic now a Mormon, and she married a Mormon. They don't want anyone outside their faith.
She is still my friend, and I care for her, but religion is about love and caring, right. So whose right and whose wrong?
2007-07-08 18:29:34 · answer #10 · answered by DREENA 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋