They are a retired couple who are really into their lawn-and it's nice. But I am a single woman who works 12 hour night shifts. Also this year I went on vacation in May and had pnuemonia in June (doubt they knew I was sick). So my yard got kind of shaggy for a while. I'm getting it back into shape now but I noticed they quit speaking to me now. At first I thought they didn't see me wave or I was too far away but yesterday the man was ten feet away and I called "Hi!" but he didn't even look up.
Does a raggedy lawn justify the cold shoulder?
2007-07-07 23:26:01 · 14 answers · asked by barbara 7 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Good question-I can't think of anything else that could have offended them-I'm quiet and my cats only use my flowerbeds as litterboxes.
2007-07-07 23:43:35 · update #1
Hmmmph-well that's all you know about cats. I have spent many hours observing mine and they DO only use my flowerbeds-probably because of the catnip growing there. Also, I've lived here 6 years with the cats-why get huffy about it now?
2007-07-08 20:08:38 · update #2
I can relate to your worry but life is too short to even care what mere neighbors think of you and your lifestyle. You seem like a nice, hard working woman. You know you are not lazy and that you have a legitimate reason for letting your lawn go. Don't worry about what they think. Live life for yourself.
2007-07-08 02:47:04 · answer #1 · answered by Teddy Bear 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lf it's definately your lawn that's 'offending' them, then yes, they are being extremely impolite. l know it's hard to live next door to houses that aren't well kept (l'm NOT saying yours is!), but manners and courtesy matter more to people than a lawn! Gosh, if l was you l would go over and try to start a converstation with them, just about anything in general, that should give you an idea of why they're giving you the cold sholder. Maybe they'll even tell you. lf you can, try and slip into the conversation that you were ill, they may think twice then. Otherwise, l wouldn't worry about them if their lawns are more important than their neighbours! Good luck, l hope you're feeling better now.
2007-07-08 06:50:22 · answer #2 · answered by Sonja 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds a very extreme reaction to something very minor! Even if your lawn is a little 'shaggy' it's hardly worth falling out with a neighbour over.
I wonder if it might be worth calling on them and asking how things are? Say you haven't seen them for a while and wonder if all is well. You could let it 'slip' that you've been unwell and are not up to date on what is going on in the neighbourhood.
That would give them a chance to air any grievance they may have and also allow you the chance to find out what's on their mind ~ it may be that they have other troubles and you are not even on the radar. You could be in the position of offering them some support.
If not, and it is the lawn that's at issue ... then yes, rude is a mild way to describe it!
Best wishes :-)
2007-07-08 07:36:12 · answer #3 · answered by thing55000 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes they are rude. And no it does not justify a cold shoulder.
I too, would complain about peoples' lawns not being kept properly, and then suddenly I realized that someone may be sick or going through a crisis. The lawn would be the least of their worries. I was ashamed of myself for even thinking this way.
But I have neighbors who speak sometimes and sometimes they don't, regardless. Very weird.
2007-07-08 09:48:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your neighbors are impolite. No doubt about it. They only care about outer appearances like the shape of one's lawn and they are too shallow to know that something else might be going on with you. They are not justified. Since they are elderly, just wait for them to die and then you will get new neighbors who will hopefully have a better attitude.
2007-07-08 06:42:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is a new behaviour then it might be that they are that superficial. I have noticed that the world of the elderly gets smaller and smaller. So they probably just see what they do and what you are not doing...very egocentric. Don't stop trying to connect with them. They need to understand that their evaluation of you is clouded and unreasonable. In fact, they could be some help to you if they wanted to look beyond their own needs.
It scares me that people the same age as me, seem old and set in their ways.I am trying to take a lesson from my observations as I age....
I remind myself to Keep looking outward. Connect with others. Keep current in information and technology. Keep active. Keep an open mind. Things change...
2007-07-08 07:04:24 · answer #6 · answered by Goddess of Laundry 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all are you sure it's your lawn that is offending them?
If so then they need a life, you having a shaggy lawn does not give them the right to snub you.
I would just stop trying to talk to them and see what happen's once you get your yard back in shape.
2007-07-08 06:34:21 · answer #7 · answered by Stacey W 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You don't KNOW that your cats only use your lawn. I'm guessing it's the cats and the yard combined.
They figure you're not considerate enough to keep your cats off their yard, and see your yard as confirmation that you're the kind of person who just doesn't care about anyone but yourself.
I've never seen a cat that "only" used it's yard.
2007-07-08 11:34:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You never know what people are thinking. This could be about the lawn or just being about not wanting to speak to you. Some people are strange.
2007-07-08 07:42:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, a nice neighbor would have acknowledged you. Maybe asked how you are so they could hear a explanation, and possibly offer help. Unfortunatly that is how superficial, and self centered some people have become.
2007-07-08 06:42:28 · answer #10 · answered by Animalfriend 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋