Whoa, please help..?

Question

Okay, all my friends have been to parties, and it's not just birthday parties, or everytime I talk to my friends they have a friend over or watching a movie, or gone bowling. My parents never let me do that stuff. I feel kinda left out. I havent seen a movie in over a year, and my friends laugh at me. How can I convince my parents to let me do fun stuff with my friends? My parents are watching over me 24/7, I know that is their job but still, I'm 12, I wanna be with my friends.

I dont mean go to the movies by myself. I mean with my mom or someone.

Answer 1

Seems like your parents care about you alot and wanna make sure you dont' get into any trouble, but they are being a little over protective, the best thing to do is prove to them your mature enough to do these things, sit down and talk to them and tell them how your feeling, tell them you no right from wrong, what you can do and what you can't and you'd like to have the opportunity to do these things, you just talking to them shows how mature you are....ask them if they'd feel better if they drove you and friends to the movies or wherever....just talk to them girl, as long as there willing to listen i'm sure you all could come up with a compromise.

Answer 2

I think maybe your parents are a little over-protective, but you're still young. I agree with a lot of the advice already given. If you show them you can be responsible, then maybe they'll let you do more. If you get invited over to someone's house, can they instead of just saying no, you're too young, call that friend's parents and see what the situation is going to be like. If it's a party, who is going to be chaperoning, how many kids, etc. Then you can have your parents drop you off and pick you up, and if you show you're responsible, they can let you do more stuff. If you want to go to a movie with friends, maybe they'd feel more confident about it, if they could drop you off and pick you up there, especially if the theater is at the mall or something. Or, even suggest that they come with to the movies, and maybe they'll see something else that lets out at a similar time. That way they'll know for sure that you actually saw a movie, rather than just assuming you did.

Or, you could have them talk to some of your friend's parents, just chat about what kind of things they let their daughter do, so they can see that maybe they're over-reacting, and you could have some similar privelidges as your same aged friends do. Maybe they don't realize they're being overly protective. Have your parents chaperone a movie, or bowling, or a trip to the mall, etc. Maybe in a year or so then they'd let you do more things on your own with friends.

Another thing, do you have an older sibling who could chaperone events like going to a movie? I know not always the older child wants to, but maybe if you ask your older sibling to join them for a movie, with maybe one friend of yours, that would be ok with your parents. But from the way you put things, it doesn't sound like you have older siblings. Either you're the oldest or an only child, and your parents are still unsure about what is right and what is proper for a 12 year old girl to be doing on her own with friends.

Answer 3

Need more information darlin'...what are your parents' reasons for not letting you go bowling or to the movies...my advice depends on that information!

If your parents have financial difficulties and/or a whole lot of mouths to feed, then the problem could be that they can't afford to give you $10 or more to go to the movies or to go bowling. If that's the case, ask your parents if you can use babysitting or birthday money for these things.

If, on the other hand, as your name suggests, your parents have religious reasons for restricting certain activities, then my advice is to live up to your name by respecting and honoring their choices. Perhaps they object to your friends or to the lack of supervision at the activities you mentioned. If this is the case, perhaps you need to get involved with a church youth group that plans fun activities.

I wasn't allowed to go to parties or other outings that involved boys until I was 16...and even then, my parents wanted to know who, what, when, and where and immediately vetoed any party held at a home where they didn't know the parents AND didn't know the parents would be home! At 12, I also wasn't allowed to go to a lot of movies...G-rated only and then only if the movie didn't have an occult or anti-religious theme (no Casper the friendly ghost for me). ...and there are far fewer good G-rated films now than there were when I was a child!

However, I was part of an active church youth group and was allowed to go bowling, to parties, and more as part of that group even at your age! My parents even let me go to concerts, co-ed summer camp and participate in overnight "lock-ins" with the entire group!

The most important thing you can do is talk to your parents and ask them what you need to do to be given a little more freedom. I hated the restrictions on me as much as you probably dislike the ones on you, but I realize now that my parents were doing what they thought was best to protect me...if your parents are Christian, they are probably doing the same for you...talk to them and talk to God!

Answer 4

Your parents should take you to the movies.My children are 4 and 6 and we go watch the kid movies. Your parents just love you allot and they want to make sure your the best you can be.One day you will be 18 and can then decide what you do, but seriously your parents do sound a bit extreme.Good Luck!

Answer 5

First of all, figure out WHY your parents are overprotective? Is it because they think you might have sex, do drugs, become an atheist? I would suggest starting to hang out with people they 'approve' of; your church friends and people who's parents they're friends with. See if they'll let you have friends over to YOUR house, once they've met your friends and realize they're not 'dangerous', they'll probably loosen up.

If not, you'll just have to tell them you're not feeling well, pretend to go to bed, and sneak out.
That's what I did. I got caught a couple times, they grounded me, no big, but it showed my parents that it's better to allow me to go out somewhere knowing where I am.
It became "I'm going here to do X, whether or not I do it with your permission is up to you."

If I thought they'd lock me up or come get me, hey, better to ask forgiveness than permission.

While you're out, just use your head and stay out of trouble otherwise, if anything that's going on around you makes you nervous, or you don't want to be a part of it, call home, they'll come and get you.

Answer 6

invite your friends to your house to watch movies, play games, or have a party. You are very young to go out without an adult to watch over you. Show your parents that you are trustworthy and mayby they will let you go to functions that have adults there chapparoning.

Answer 7

You're only 12, you could invite your friends over to your house or something. Just talk to your parents about this, not us.

Answer 8

See if you can get your parents to agree to a sleep-over at home, where they can chaperone and make certain things go well.

if you can start to show maturity and responsibility, they may allow for other activities

Answer 9

im 13 and went through the same thing....
you just need to take more responsibility

infact my mom STILL doesn't let me walk to the taco bell 100yds away from the movies....
and it sucks

Answer 10

i'm going threw this with my daughter we take her and her friends or they meet us there and we stay with them but we stay back let her enjoy herself .. its just hard to see all the kiddnappings going on and rapes and its hard to let go of her... try talkin to them ask them to go with you..