is ok to be a girl virgin at 17?

Question

ok see the problem is I'm not a very outgoing person, most of it has to do with God and all and I always try to put him first even if I'm not the best person in the world and I also don't want to hurt my mom.But see the thing is my bestfriend is thinking about losing her virginity and don't get me wrong I've been thinking the same thing as well.See the big deal of it all is she's younger than me and she always does everything before me which sucks.She always gets the boys as for me I've never had a boyfriend,which I've never told her but I know she knows.Never really had any friends either to tell you the truth she's my first real friend which makes things worst.B/c no one has ever loved me and I've never really loved anyone.I'm so confused could someone help me.........please?

Answer 1

Yes, it's perfectly fine to be a virgin at your age. Believe me, when the time is right, it will happen. This is definitely not the kind of thing you rush just to get it out of the way. I'm not particularly religious or conservative, and I certainly didn't wait til marriage. BUT!!, you want your first time to be special, with someone you love, because you will have a lifetime of memories and you want them to be special. Just having sex to get the "virgin" thing done and over with is going to leave you with sad memories of how you wasted something special on someone who didn't deserve it and how you were used. Wait until you feel you are loved by someone, and you love them back, and it will be very special, even if you don't stay together.

Having sex without love doesn't make you feel loved. It makes you feel used. The love will come. Just wait for it. Just don't get all hung up about when you should be giving it up. If your friend is pressuring you, she either has already lost her virginity and is feeling ashamed of how she did it and wants to bring you down to her level, or she is trying to get you to do it at the same time so she can have more courage in going through with it. The thing is, she doesn't sound like a very good best friend if she is advocating you lose your virginity just because she plans to do so herself. This is not a competition type of thing.

Someone once told me that women tend to have 2 types of friends. One they look up to and try to be like. One they consider less than themselves to make them feel better about themselves. You know, either fatter or not as pretty or not as smart or not as outgoing. I think your friend thinks of you as the "lesser" friend, and she preys upon your insecurities to make you stay less than her. Hold on to your virginity because it makes you special.

Answer 2

I understand the extra pressure you probably feel due to the fact that your friend does all those things before you. But the most important thing is to make sure that when you do lose your virginity it's to someone you love and plan to be with. It makes it that much better. Believe me!! There are plenty of people who wait until they're married and that's including people in their 30's! So it's fine if you're still a virgin at 17, you are still young and may feel like it's the right time now. But sometimes you need to listen to your head not your hormones. So whatever decision you make I hope you feel like it's the right one for YOU!! Good luck!

Answer 3

I think it's understandable that you feel scared and afraid about your sexuality since you're so young and you really don't know what's out there.
I think you should do what's comfortable for you and don't worry what everyone else is doing. Your friend might be in a different position in life and have different sets of aspirations, goals and dreams than you do.
Honestly, being a virgin isn't such a bad thing, especially at age 17. It's very hard at an age like that to know what love is, and if you're not sure whether you're ready or comfortable, it's probably best to err on the side of caution.
That said, you probably don't want to do it just to do it. That would probably be tough on you since you'd want physical intimacy to pair up with emotional security.
The other thing is that you might want to look at yourself and evaluate what you respect about yourself and how you view yourself as a human being. I think to love someone, you have to love yourself. Be true to yourself, and don't let anything get in the way of your dreams and hopes.
Try to get out there and meet people, but be yourself in the process, and don't define yourself by any relationship.

Feel free to email me if you'd like to talk more.

Good luck!

Answer 4

honey i'm like u, just younger. i'm 16 almost 17and i try really hard to put God first in my life and if i did have sex now, my mom would die. i have friends who put pressure on me but they all know i plan to wait til marriage. it's just something i've wanted for always. if u want to wait, don't let people push u, no matter what. i recently got out of a great 8 month relationship and we talked about it and we both wanted to wait. by the way we're still really really good friends. see this is where u get God into ur life for real. he will send someone ur way and help u with this. so what ur friend has had a bf before u. i bet that when u get into ur first serious relationship, it'll be more than she ever had(no offense meant). wait for love and experience. and if ur not outgoing on the outside who said u weren't outgoing when it comes to love(and future reference...sex)? i'll be prayin for u is all i can say.

Answer 5

It will have to be commemorated for an single forty 12 months ancient to nonetheless be a virgin. Funny due to the fact that that turns out mocked in present day society. Sex is a logo of devotion and love. It fairly is whatever detailed that you'll percentage with anyone else. That being the case, it should not be the sort of factor that's simply thrown round each time, anyplace or with any individual. It will have to be reserved till you discover anyone who is inclined to exhibit you that equal devotion, loyalty and love.

Answer 6

Yes, that's totally fine! Please remember that your virginity is something you can only give once and it will never come back. It is precious. Don't waste it on someone who's not worth it because you are way better than that. I regret giving mine away every day. My position is a terrible one to be in; don't put yourself there when you could so easily avoid it.

If your friend wants to give hers away, you can't really stop her. You can try to talk her out of it, sure, but she'll do what she wants in the end. However, you are responsible for you! It's alright to be a virgin and I really respect your modesty.

Best of luck. :)

Answer 7

Yes it's ok to be a virgin, it's great. Dont worry about "keeping up" with your friend. Dont let that pressure u into anything. Whats good is if you stay a virgin, and marry a guy he will have more respect for you. It will be special. Sex isn't something you just give away. Its something you share with the one you love. Take it easy.
Good luck
Alabama

Answer 8

It is so totally ok! and trust me, you will be fine. you sound like a great person and i'm sure you'll find someone. and some people just never have tons of friends, but those friends that they do have are really close. honestly, dont worry about a thing, just yourself and you'll find someone eventually. the kind of love you find might be the kind everyone ends up wanting. maybe youre just looking for the perfect guy and he hasnt shown up yet.


good luck!

Answer 9

don't worry about it your just waiting for somebody that means something to you i was 18 when i lost my virginity and he was my first i had never loved someone as much as i loved him.
but don't just meet some guy just to keep up with your mate that would just be pure stupidity. just wait. i used to feel like that before i met my boyfriend so i always told my mates that i was seeing guys that they didn't know, i also told them that i had lost my virginity when i was 13 which was a complete lie and from then on everybody thought i was a 5lut.

JUST WAIT

Answer 10

Totally! Save ur virginity for the specail person who will come all in good time. B/c u don't to go with some guy and have sex with him and then u get something like herpies or STDS or something else . So it's ok to wait. :)