Opinions...?

Question

This is a long one so please read the whole thing before answering...

My fiance used to ask me for my opinion on things and take my advice so that we could get things done and done well. About a month ago, he asked me for my opinions but wouldn't take my advice. Now he's neither asking for my opinions or asking for my advice and he's (pardon my french) F*CKING UP EVERYTHING! Anytime he doesn't take my advice or ask my opinion before doing something, it goes wrong and he either breaks something or ruins it. The thing is, I ask him for his opinions and advice on everything. He also used to do nothing but make me happy now he does nothing but annoy me. I don't know what's going on but I want help on this. What should I do? I've tried talking to him but he won't listen. I have to literally b*tch at him before he listens...

I don't boss him around, I ask him for his opinions and advice on EVERYTHING before I do it and we used to decide on things together, now we don't agree on anything and he doesn't listen to me anymore. Like I said, the only times he listens to me is when I HAVE to b*tch at him. Our relationship used to be 50/50, now it's more like 15/85..

Answer 1

Sorry to say but it sounds like this relationship is going nowhere but downhill. You two are no longer compatible, time to bail

Answer 2

There's obviously a deeper issue here. To make a sudden change like that for no apparent reason leads me to think he's either having some problems at work with his co-workers or perhaps, he's getting involved with someone else. His guilt is tugging at him and that's why his temper flairs like it is. He's in a hard spot and can't deal with the pressure he's gotten into. Has his behavior changed in any other way?...working longer hours, going out for drinks, spending more time with buddy's?...I can't say he's having an affair, I don't know anything, but, I would consider it as a possibility from what you have said...If he has a cell phone, check the bill when it comes in for any unfamiliar phone numbers, etc... --Good Luck!

Answer 3

Actually you really don't have to literally "b i t c h" before he listens to you; in fact, that may be producing the condition you 're complaining about. People tend to shut down when they feel belittled or berated, and they're less likely to seek counsel from folks who lord that arrangement over them. It erodes trust by making you less approachable. Perhaps you do this unconsciously, but everything you've written suggests it quite clearly. (Read you entire question and statements again). People aren't pets waiting to have their lives improved by their loved ones...try to be more of a partner, as less of a dictator. Good luck.

Answer 4

It sounds to me like in this relationship it is either.. "your way our the highway" Maybe he finally got a backbone and some balls....If you want to be such a dictator why don't you become a prison guard that way you can boss all the men around and get paid for it too. A relationship is GIVE and take. 50-50 ..............Good luck dragging him kicking and screaming to the alter..........

Answer 5

Sometimes we have to step back and let our men fail. Nagging him into listening doesn't work, it just annoys him. He isn't really listening anyway. Say what you want to say once or twice, avoid b*tching at him. Give him space and watch what happens. Try to avoid the 'I told you so' when he doesn't follow your advice and everything falls apart.

Answer 6

that sounds like a normal day for me.. Sooner or later (after hes ****** up more ****) he will realize you seem to know what your talking about and star asking you opinion. For now just let him make the mistakes he will soon realize he needs you in this decision process.

Answer 7

Get out of it now. Divorce rates are so high in this country...