Why are coworkers rude to each other?

Question

I thought we were a team? When I say good morning to you, is it that difficult to say it back even if you don't mean it? After a year of working together, do you honestly think I believe you don't know me?

What should I do? I get so "down" working in this environment. I smile and work through it but by the end of the day I'm drained. It's not fair on me or my family.

Answer 1

I think of it as a way to annoy them. I smile and wave when I see them. Just like I do when rude people give "the finger". It makes them wonder what you are up to.
We have a doc at work who doesn't like to speak to the nurses, so when he comes in, I'm on my feet. "Good Morning! Can we get anything for you? Would you like some coffee? Bed 3's family is anxious to see you. Would you like me to go get them for you?" It freaks him out SO bad!

Answer 2

If your only issue with your coworker(s) is not being greeted with "good morning", I'd say you're doing pretty well.

Some people think there is a place for work and another place for friends. They have had issues with past coworkers and they're afraid to let anyone else become that close to them again.

There are others who have heard office gossip about them which has been rumored to have come from another individual and so they never confront the person who supposedly started it- they just remain angry day after day until they explode.

And others are just not friendly or outspoken.

People are too afraid to approach others in a working environment, to voice problems they are having, and they take it straight to the boss. That is immature and inconsiderate. Try talking to your coworker and raise your concern. They may not have even realized they seemed rude to you.

If the situation comes to blows, then both of you should go and have a talk with the boss and try to work out a reasonable solution. You're there after all mainly to work, not to socialize.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Know what you mean. Another thing I hate is when you start a new job, everyone wants to know your business..."Are you married? Do you have any kids?, etc." Like they really give a sh**! My attitude is that if I don't want to know that information about you, then don't ask me???

When you get sick and use a day or two for that, you come back and EVERYBODY wants to know why you called in, were you sick??? Duh! When my co-workers come back to work, if they have an injury or something, I will show concern, but basically I don't want to know anything about them. It is none of my business.

I have had the same experience trying to be nice and perky and say good morning to people. They are so ho-hum and lethargic.

I always try to choose jobs that I KNOW I really like doing. The things you can think about at work are: I really enjoy my work; I get a paycheck for doing this; and I am doing this for me and my family...nobody else.

Don't change the way you are basically, despite the gloom and doom atmosphere at work. Continue to be courteous and happy in the morning. Say good morning, no matter the outcome, for this is who you are.

You might have a meeting with your supervisor or the group and express your feelings that there seems to be a real lack of enthusiasm in your area. Ask what can WE do about this. In the last place I worked, this was an okay thing to do (as far as my boss was concerned). She was very upbeat, some of the crew was not.

Anyway, good luck. Hope things get better!

Answer 4

Well, work typically isn't an enjoyable place for most. For most people work is hard and undesirable. The stress this causes in their minds emanates from them through rude behavior, because they "aren't ready to deal with them yet," or "don't care about those people at the moment, I'll just keep walking." These people are so self absorbed and are so busy feeling sorry for themselves that they don't care whether their rude behaviors make you or others feel bad.
Most of these people don't realize this, and are typically nice people when they're not at work or some other stressful environment. It's just the combination of waking up early, long or annoying commutes and bosses. Bosses suck.
So don't take it personally. I'm sure if you saw them walking through the grocery store on a friday or saturday, they'd be bright, cheery and happy to see you. Perhaps one of those "five hour energy" shots right around 3 in the afternoon will make your entire day easier and will help you to feel less drained for your family. I hope this helps!

Answer 5

LIfe is sometimes unfair deary...people have problems, plain and simple. Often they treat others badly out of their own disappointment an disgust for their own lives.

If work is that horrible, leave and move on. Life is way too short to have to be influenced by such a negative environment.

If you can't leave work, then maybe invite the co-worker to a short meeting or a cup of coffee and say something like this..." "Cindy" I said hello to you this morning and you didn't answer...are you ok? I want you to know I am here if you need someone to talk to."

Leave at that...she might have just not heard you, or maybe her mind is on other things. Once approached, she may have not even realized how she is coming across.

If things still don't get better...approach your supervisor about addressing the poor morale in the office. Offer to organize an office picnic or something. Maybe this would help.

When the going gets tough, the tough get going...so instead of holding your feelings inside, do something about it...take action.

Answer 6

Is it just the "good morning" that's getting to you? Or is it other things?

The chances that you're going to change these people's behavior is minor.

That leaves you with 2 options: look for another job (even another department in the same company, if possible), or learn to live with it, without letting it get to you.

Maybe you can find a way to be amused by your coworkers' behavior.

That way, even though they haven't changed, at least it won't ruin your day.

I see a lot of the answers are a bit confused.

You aren't saying you want to be best buddies with all these people; just that you think the common curtesies, such as acknowledging each other's existence, would be appropriate.

But, if you've good morning-ed for a year and never gotten a response, I'd say you aren't going to start getting them now.

Either accept that this isn't going to change, or stop saying good morning.

As I'd said, it would have been easier to help if you'd given any other examples of what you're talking about.

Answer 7

Because they don't check their attitudes at the door like they're supposed to do. A lot of people will bring their problems from their outside life into the work environment and they end up taking it out on their co-workers. I'm in college right now and have the same problem with a lot of classmates. Then again, some people are just negative and grumpy all the time anyways. If this is the case then they should just get a job where they will primarily be working by themselves. My best friend calls me every other day about the drama that goes on in her office. Rude managers and bitchy co-workers. All you can do is go in with the mindset that you're not going to let these people steal your joy. Personally, in my situation, I deal with it by keeping to myself. I got tired of walking in the classroom every morning, greeting everyone with hello and getting absolutely nothing in return. Some people just aren't worth wasting your good manners on no matter how long you've been working with them!

Answer 8

yeah well people are A holes. Anyone who you say hi to and they dont answer back dont make the same mistake twice. They obviously think they are better than you or more important. people are so petty! Just go about your day and talk to people there who have been nice to you. Afterall you arent there to make friends you are there to make money and why should your family suffer because of some A hole? meaning 1. - you shouldnt take your work home with you and 2. why would you quit because of some A hole? next time you see them in the hallway just look at them and shake your head. they will get the message.

Answer 9

SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST PLAIN RUDE! there really is no explanation for some peoples actions. dont feel like u have to bend over backwards to please them. all u can do is hold your head up high and know that you put your best foot forward. dont let their bad attitudes get you down. at the end of the day you go home to your loving family and you know that you were a good person, let karma come back around to those nasty people. but i know what you mean i seriously hate people who cant even say good morning. what can ya do?

Answer 10

You have to rise above it and realize that there are a lot of people out there that are so into themselves; an/or, are totally unhappy people. Their mission is to make everyone around them miserable.

I do know that it is a physically unhealthy environment to be in. Any chance you can try a different place to work. It may not be any different, but at least you'll know that you tried.