People expect more of me than what I can give. Am I as lazy and slack as people say?

Question

I used to be ambitious, I still am to a degree. That was before I developed chronic schizophrenia. Since recovered and stabilised (yes it is possible) I have taken control of my life and I am that good that nobody even suspects a thing. Obtained a professional qualification, and people assume I should be working in that field. The truth is I have learnt my limitations and learnt that if I give myself too much pressure and stress I will make myself ill, which is how it developed in the first place. Everybody says I am lazy and a bludger to society. I do the work I feel I can do when it is available but everybody says I can do better. I go to job interviews and they expect me to be more experienced at them and more relaxed about it. I try the best I can and feel I am getting better but I do not conform to others expectations. They think I will be too much work to train as I get agitated and stressed but am pretty independent and work hard at what I can do. Am I lazy?

Answer 1

You have been through a lot, and you have to go at the pace that suits you. Try not to let other people rule your life. everybody is different.

Answer 2

People are always like that. They tend not to expect the same things or as much from themselves. These people need to be educated before they go judging you. What you have done and are doing is a HUGE accomplishment. So many people just give up. Schizophrenia is no easy disorder to overcome. I know med.'s and counseling have helped you. However, the larger picture is YOU HELPED YOURSELF. Continue to do what feels comfortable to you. Be happy with yourself and your achievements. Learn more about how to cope with stress and improving your self esteem. You can do whatever you want. It needs to be your decision, your pace and your life. There are actually surgeons with this disorder. Not everyone can, will, or wants to do that. It's just a little encouragement for you. Don't worry about those people. Just be happy with yourself. I am a patient, also. I was incorrectly diagnosed with schizophrenia. However, my symptoms were similar. I am doing much better now, also. So I have some idea of what you have been through and are still going through. If you want to talk, about anything, e mail me @
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Take care.

Answer 3

you're not lazy, you're just pressured by the people that surrounds you. i experienced a similar incident when i first stepped in college. my family expected me to take nursing course cause i can earn more money and besides, my uncle offered to pay all my educational expenses if i took that course. i was convinced to try an entrance exam for that field, but i failed. i decided to follow my heart and take what i want the most, which is mass communication, and i'm proud to say that i'm doing best in this field, more so i think, than if i pursued something i didn't want, and would regret wasting all that effort and money. at first, my relatives were like mocking me, saying i might be assigned in Iraq, i better be careful. i know they're making fun of me, and i hate it when they think that i should've taken nursing instead of masscom. sometimes, it's hard to avoid people making expectations about you, and they think that they know best for you. i believe that as a person, you have the right to choose and decide the course of your life. don't let other people dictate what direction you should take, for your life can be managed by one alone and that's you. don't strain yourself to meet their expectation, cause the only expectation you should think and try to reach is your own. you call all the shots. they can just either cheer you or give you advice. god bless and will pray for you. =)

Answer 4

You have to put your health condition first. That includes listening to your body and staying within your limitations. By doing what you are doing you are securing your continued success with your condition. People usually make comments out of ignorance. If you want, you can try to educate them, but they would have to want to be educated. You have to do whats best for you and not what people want (usually what they want is all about them and not at all about you). Keep going to interviews (if that is what you want)...eventaully you will get hired by someone who has the compassion to understand what youve gone through, but will also see your hidden potential. I am not sure what your profession is, but is there anyway you can freelance (maybe work through a temporary agency...they would send you out on jobs that are only for a couple of days or weeks). Perhaps you can do a fee for service from home. Don't worry about anyone else...your continued stabilization is the most important thing.

Answer 5

No. You are having a common problem after a psychologic trouble episode: you dont want it to come back. You are not lazy, only too afraid of the triggers.

Connect with yourself. There are few things that relax more that to think: "When I finish all this bummer of todays work, I will do something I like!" and do it. Learn to handle the pressure so it is less and less triggering.

Answer 6

Hi Jack,

It is a real accomplishment that you got your schizophrenia under control and are now completely normal. I am sure the meds helped and all.. but it shows your determination and strength of character.

People are always out to judge you.. no matter how good you are! So don't bother about them.

From what you describe of you, I don't think you are the least bit lazy. I think you know EXACTLY what pace you should set yourself and have set course at that pace. Don't listen to others.

Keep it up bro! You are doing a good job. Forget what others have to say about you.

Answer 7

only i pray that yahoo managers would personally send for me in nigeria here. a lot of problem like your s ican sovle with just a pices of advice. all you need do is get a drive somthing that can drive you in life. and that is vision when you have avision in life it become a drive that will make you act in life. this you must creat withing your phisical capacity. -1 locate where u can still be useful in life -2 lacate what you can in in it -3 check on how best you can perfom on what you have located then share your vision with those who belive in you and can help you out. star here first, then you will know how to continue. pls. do n ot share your vision with those that does not belive in you. thank you. i love solving people problem.

Answer 8

OMG it is your life tell those A holes to go take a fly screw at the moon.. You can only do what you can do, you know your limits that illness is no picnic ... Congrat pats on the back to you, most people with it can live normal so good for you ...

Answer 9

If EVERYBODY says that about you then maybe you should rethink your perception of how hard you really try at stuff.

Best of luck.

Find something you love doing and work will not seem like work.

Answer 10

I think you should be really proud of yourself!!!! This is a debillitating illnesss and it sounds to me as you are doing really well in managing it. Power to you!