What to do with a messy boyfriend?

Question

I don't live with my boyfriend, but I do visit his house often. The first time I went over there, I was shocked at how much stuff is piled up everywhere and how he never cleans. He blamed the mess on his roommates, but since then I've realized that he is the one making the mess. The bathroom is starting to grow black fuzz and the floors are coming alive. I was hoping he would clean it up a bit, but nope. It just keeps getting worse. I don't know how to tell him I'm disgusted. I don't want to go there anymore! Help!

Answer 1

hmmmmmmmmm well that is a definite preview of what your future may look like.
something to consider. my husband never did any housework and when we got married we moved into our first apartment. Its been 10 years :) and he's gotten a lot better and sometimes cleans up better than i do.

If he ever invites you again just let him know - " have your roommates clean up and then I will come over" this way its indirectly said to him and feelings are not hurt now unless he is straight forward guy then I would say.. im not too crazy about the mess how about my place.

Answer 2

I live with my boyfriend and he does that too. I actually picked up bad habits since he started living with me. We leave empty glasses and bottles in my room all the time. I never used to do that. I have told him before we need to clean but then two days late (sometimes the next day) it's right back to where it was. You need to let him know that you don't like staying at his house because you feel like you can't touch anything. If he blames it on his roommates again then you need to speak up and tell him, "then you need to talk to your roommates and/or start cleaning up after them" Also, to make it a little easier for him (guys don't like to clean) You could spend a day helping him clean. Get everything nice and clean in his whole room and then tell him if he wants to you keep coming over then he needs to keep it that way. When my boyfriend lived at home his mom, sister, and I cleaned his room (spotless) for a gift for him for his birthday. You could clean for him for the next holiday, I bet he would appreciate it. Then if it gets dirty again say to him you don't like coming over and working hard to keep his room clean when he doesn't do anything. Good Luck!

Answer 3

LOL.... Clean it for him, give him a hint...

I live with my bf... he's messy too. The funny thing is that when we moved into together he said he was a neat freak... I'm not the cleanist person in the world but I like stuff to be in some sort of order. He leaves his cloths and dishes just laying around all the time... You will learn to love picking up after him... Cause you always know that if it wasn't for you he wouldn't have any clean cloths and he would be either naked or really smelly... LOL

Answer 4

you have a few choices-ask him to clean it or your not going there again, say nothing and expect it to get worse, or you can be the princess and get help from above=this is the best way to good laughter, fun and everwhat=see the lighter side of life, please!, and I am born Jewish

then again I am now kicked out of my synagogue because I am called a rebel, no not for my sins-they felt even if I was an atheist I am still Jewish, yet because I believed in hope and my Jewish scriptures-I am considered a traitor a rebel! Isaiah 9:6 "Unto us a child is born, a son is given, and he will be the mighty God and the prince of peace."

I wish the best for you and this was my breakthrough=when one realizes that Jesus unconditionally loves them
regardless of the torments of evil, problems, tests and trials, and tears through to smiles. May we realize that Jesus brings the
best in life to each of us every day, if we just open our spiritual
eyes=His mercies are new every morning, great is thy
faithfulness (Lamentations 3:21-26,. then a new beginning happens every day.
If you feel lost pray="Jesus help me, I am sorry for letting you down, forgive me and lift me up where I belong, come into my heart to stay, help me find your best way, amen." Revelation 1:1, & 3:19&20 spoken by Jesus from heaven "As many as I love, I rebuke and correct, turn quickly to me from sin. Behold I stand at your heart door and knock, if you hear my word and ask me in, I will come in and be your friend."

If we already had done that then its asking him to forgive and restore the joy of our salvation (Psalm 51)

Jesus understands us heart and soul, he is trustworthy,

have the best day ever, heads up and smiled, David though not in the good book 'cleanliness is next to Godliness' it reflects our heart-and the Good Lord did change me-yet I never would live like the way you described even before I came to know the good Lord.

Answer 5

I think you should just be honest. I had that same problem with blaming the mess on the roomate and then the roomate moves out and it was still a mess! Tell him that you think it is gross, but that you'd be willing to help him clean up and get organized. That might inspire him. Good luck!

Answer 6

Don't be scared just tell him wealther if he like it or not because all of that could make you sick just b comin around him and you don't want that. But help him clean up his mess and teach him how to stay clean and you aint want a guy who dress nice and his background is dirty.

Answer 7

You are giving up on him because he is messy?

You need to find out why he is like that. There are reasons that people are like that, some are because they are raised that way and some are because they need help. You need to find out which one he is. If you don't like him because of this now, I hope marriage isn't in your future to him because there will be a lot of fighting and unhappiness over something so trivial as his messiness.

Answer 8

well i fell sorry for you if you marry him.. yeah very sorry. well ask him if you guys can both clean the house and you could help him and if in less then a month its back how it was before i suggest you get a new BF b/c he is NASTY and god only knows if he keeps his body as nasty as his house EEEEWWWWWWW!

Answer 9

lol call clean house and if that doesnt work tell him how you feel or help him clean it

Answer 10

Tell him his house is so nasty you will not go in it again until it is cleaned up.