my boyfriend was the first to ask me out when he found out that i liked him. he said he liked me too. but only a couple weeks later my friends (7 out of 10 of them said this) that my bf was taking advantage of me and only wanted me for my body. i trust them very much and i believed them when they said this. but when i asked him he said that they were wrong and that he wasn't only with me because of that. he said that he did think i was hot but that wasn't the only reason. i trusted him but the rumors still bothered me. i got them more and more and then he started ignoring me but whenever we were together, he was all sweet and treated me like i was the last girl in the world. i broke up with him cuz i didn't know what to believe anymore. well it's been a month since that happened and i always find myself thinking of him and every song reminds me of him. i don't want to get back together because i know i will get hurt again and he played me but i still love him. what should i do?
2007-07-04 17:25:08 · 13 answers · asked by abcdefg 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he doesn't seem like the kind of person who would take advantage of me tho because he just doesn't do that. believe me. i've known him all my life. are my very trustworthy friends lying to me in hopes to have broken us apart or is he lying??
2007-07-04 17:25:56 · update #1
Girl - trust your friends. On the inside, we don't see the whole picture, especially if we are looking throough the glassy eyes of love/lust.
Your friends pick up on things you don't, trust me, I was in the same boat one time.
Your lover boy was a luster boy.
Giving up your body to him turned on the hormones and the longings you are feeling are just lusting hormones.
Love should have meant building a friendship so that you would really know him...and him you. Expecting sex, which you are now referring to as your feelings of love...isn't love at all.
Tell me...if you turn off the sex..does he still want you? Is he still your best friend, or does he get mad and frustrated and want to turn to the next girl? How long did it take him to find someone else?
The answers to those questions reveal the truth about him.
Save the sex for someone who is your best friend and lover. Guys come a dime a dozen...and at your age their hormones are out of control.
Your innocense is gone...
Breaking up with him was a great thing on your part. If he was a friend...he'd still be just a friend without pressuring you for any more sex.
Move on.
You can't get hurt by him if you don't let him hurt you. Get away. You need to find you.
The urges for lust will always be there...keep busy and wait for the guy who will love you as a friend first and will not take advantage of you. Your first time with the right guy won't have these detrimental after shocks.
Your need to be loved and accepted in life does not need you to be giving up what is most valuable.
The right guy is out there...in the mean time, concentrate on a positive future for yourself...school, and personal growth.
Don't let anyone take something that is not theirs to have.
2007-07-04 17:47:14 · answer #1 · answered by cadvadvocate 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you give up your body too soon, then you never really know how the guy feels for you. That is why it is best to wait.
If it was just because you had a nice body to look at, then that is okay. Plenty of guys will be attracted to your body if you are nicely built. Then just give then time to show you that they like the person you are inside too!! Just don't ever rush into anything until you know that you are ready, and that he truly cares about you.
Always weigh what people tell you. Get some proof, and be careful of whether you can trust them or not.
Why not call him and talk to him about what made you think that he truly did not care. See if he really wants to be with you or not by the way he reacts to the conversation.
2007-07-04 17:38:05 · answer #2 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way to learn is to learn from your mistakes, so you can't be afraid to take a chance. All guys like girls for what they look like, ofcourse, but that doesn't mean that it's the only reason he likes you!! If a you were just hott and didnt have an attractive personality, he would have never liked you. If you don't want to take a chance and get together with him, then just spend time with him until you can come to a decision. (Spending time with him will help!)
2007-07-04 17:31:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You broke up with him because you didn't know what to believe. It seems he may be the one needing the advice because his girlfriend broke up with him for no real reason.
Do you feel you are being taken advantage of? Why did he start ignoring you? What did you do to him to make him do that? Your friends may seem great to you now, but they are not the ones who make the decision on how happy you are. If you are happy with him, then that is what matters. NOT what your friends say.
2007-07-04 17:32:03 · answer #4 · answered by lonepanther2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got the SAME situation if this guy is giving you any doubt just try and move on as much as possible I still think about my ex from months ago and I'm pretty sure he cheated on me, you wont full get over him until you find someone new but try and let go, it's all for the best
2007-07-04 17:31:06 · answer #5 · answered by Morgan vanb 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're missing him, which is normal in the process of a break-up. However, if you go back to him now, it would be like taking the scab off of a healing wound. Give yourself time. Don't make any decisions for a while. You had a lot of red flags in this relationship, and it was strong of you to listen to them. You supported your best interest. Don't back out on yourself now.
2007-07-04 17:30:09 · answer #6 · answered by danaluana 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
friends are great, but personal experince has taught me that there is only 2 in a relationship. just because your friends said something isn't a good reason to dump someone...is it bad that he enjoys your body? you are a consenting woman..trust your instincts, not your friends..if you like his attentions, and you are happy with him..then enjoy him.you said he played you..did he? or did your friends say he did? spell it out what your relationship really is. don't expect him to read your mind..know what you want and expect and tell him. if you want him go for it.
2007-07-04 17:32:48 · answer #7 · answered by Miss Chris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ofcourse you're going to still have feelings for him, you guys were a couple. Its happens to eveyone, Its hard to end things and just "quit them" If you and him are meant to be together you guys will. I say just let things be and if he was really honest with you and liked you for you and not your body he will make every effort to be with you again.
2007-07-04 17:31:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When it comes to your man,put yours girls aside.Don't mix oil with water,fine they are your friends with good intentions & you trust them.At the rate that you are going if you were to get married & they said he looks like a cheater you might wanna make a run for it..
So the best way to get your answers is if you to talk to him & ask him what his intentions with are.He might or might not tell you,but it's worth a try...
2007-07-04 17:38:07 · answer #9 · answered by Lady "D" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
msn him and say hiya it replaced into nce seeing u lower back.. whats new in ur existence? if he's an *** then purely tell urself that it's time to pass on and that u will discover greater suitable. u pronounced that u think of its bcuz u have been youthful.. 4 months doesnt make u plenty older... so it mite not substitute issues. purely so u no. if u choose greater help u can purely e mail me. wish this helped.
2016-09-29 02:35:37 · answer #10 · answered by hoehl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋