I have NEVER had a boyfriend in my entire life and where would the place to find "my guy"?
2007-07-04 14:59:50 · 9 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Time is important here. When you say your entire life, how much time are we talking about? If you are 15 you probably shouldn't worry too much. If you are 30 then, well, you may have some intimacy issues to deal with. You may even have them if you are 15 but it's too early to say for sure.
Looking for the perfect guy may be one way to deny intmacy scares you to death. You can pass up anybody by focusing on something you don't like about them or that could be an issue in the future. You can think to yourself, "I'm open and ready. It's just that that perfect guy hasn't come along yet." But in reality you're about as open as Fort Knox.
Being too sure of yourself can also be a factor. You feel convinced that certain people just couldn't work for you. While you certainly want to use your judgement when choosing a mate, like you don't want to date abusive people or cheaters, you can't possibly know that you couldn't be happy with someone who's really into camping and you're not, for example. But again, that's your fear talking.
All this time you're sitting on the fence you're not trying and you're not learning. It's like choosing a career. You can read lots of stuff about different careers and talk to people but, in the end, you really don't know until you try a few things. It's the same with relationships. You may have to make a few false starts before finding someone who works well for you. It's OK. And you can break up with someone anytime you want to if you don't like the relationship. Remember, all's fair in love and war. 50 ways to leave your lover. You don't even have to give them a reason.
Learning to love real people is the answer. You may be suprised that you can love, and have deep passionate feelings for fallible f'd up human beings. Therapy is another good tool for people with deep intimacy issues.
Just throwing some ideas out there. If you can relate use them. If not, don't worry about them.
2007-07-04 15:29:24 · answer #1 · answered by LG 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its everywhere! This is valuable information that I hope you take to heart. Never ever ever expect your "Mr. Right" to look like Mr. Right. Don't go by looks but do go by their soul, their heart and the way they look at you. You can find a true soul anywhere, but don't set your sights on the way they look on the outside. I was like that. I dated a lot of guys that were really good looking but I could never seem to want to settle down with them because they were either too shallow, too into themselves or just too assholish. To this day, I know that someone up there made it a point for me to open my heart to my now husband of 15 years. I am still in love with him and my love even grows more each day that goes by. I thank my lucky stars as this is someone I would not have looked at twice, but he lived in my apartment complex and we had a lot of the same likes. Do trust in your heart more than your eyes! Good Luck!
2007-07-04 22:07:13 · answer #2 · answered by Hello to You! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no such thing as " the perfect " anyone. It's a game of chance all throughout life, hopefully the good will outweigh the bad. Honesty is the key to happiness, but more than being honest with other people you have to be honest with yourself.
2007-07-04 22:06:05 · answer #3 · answered by aeryk_ravensong 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to be honest you dont need to go out and look for a guy. there will be that time when you will find that person.things like these dont just happen it takes time.you dont want guys thinking that you desperate so wait and the time will come.since you never had a boyfriend before you should wait coz gud things come to those who wait .
2007-07-04 22:07:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun, honestly, let me know when you do...but me personallly, i have only had one bf on and off a bunch of times. i've always been told that the right one will come one day and that you just have to let faith take it over...who knows what'll happen to you, or even me and all those other girls who are asking that same question, i like to beleive that everybody has her own prince charming and that mine (your's too) may have just taken a wrong turn and is just too stubborn to ask for directions. but until then, have fun and be free with getting into relationships and you'll be just fine! good luck to you and to all those girls who are stuck in the same situations as us...
2007-07-04 22:04:56 · answer #5 · answered by simplebutsweet 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there's no possible way to rush it.... he'll come on his own. I've never had a boyfriend either, and I continue to think positive and know that he's out there somewhere. no worries... He'll be there when the time is right. Good luck.
2007-07-04 22:06:36 · answer #6 · answered by iliveforsunsets 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there isnt an exact place to find the 'perfect guy'. you just have to keep looking. but sometimes they just come to you. out of nowhere. :]
2007-07-04 22:03:25 · answer #7 · answered by May 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know where he would be, but in order to get him, you'd better be the perfect girl.
2007-07-04 22:04:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can anyone give you that advice when we don't even know your age. Are we to assume your age and give you bogus information.
2007-07-04 22:05:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋