i need help? i cant cope with the pain?

Question

Im on the verge of a nervous breakdown because of my x bf, he was madly in love with me and then the next wanted me out of his life. He was my world i loved him dearly and still do, over the past 8 weeks since this has happened ive lost so much weight and i am bordering on anorexia, i held onto hope he would come back but i spoke with him tonight and he is being so mean to me and saying that its never going to happen again i was strung along because he had wanted to be friends and in the next breath not wanting me in his life at all. I need help i dont know what to do he has pushed me over the edge, i cant eat, i cant sleep im falling apart im a shadow of my former self. Tomorow i will collect the rest of my things and i wil tell him what i think of him i can be mean to and i think its time i just didnt want to lower myself to his level. How am i going to pull myself together, i feel now that i am very thin why not go all the way and just never eat again and just die that way!

Answer 1

I highly suggest you talk to a therapist.

Answer 2

I used to think this and I don't care what anybody says when you go into proper labour you will know. Not because of the pain but just because you will know. And the pain is really bad there is no point in any of us lying to you. It does hurt but look what you get at the end of it. You will also find that the adrenalin will kick in and you will fight the pain. (If not have some drugs if YOU want to) And the actual giving birth bit doesn't hurt it is a relief. There is no point in stressing about it. You will be dubious but it has to come out now. You dont want to be stuck like this forever. You can do it this time next week it will be over and you will wont have time to dwindle on the birth. GOOD LUCK

Answer 3

First off, DON'T consider for a moment what `you` might have done to make him act and feel that way, as someone else recommended. Even if you somehow `did` manage to upset him, there is NO wrong (not cheating, not anything) that justifies the foul behaviour you say he's exhibited (in my opinion).

I won't say "try going out, try (x), try (y)" now, because anything so mundane at this stage will sound totally worthless-- you wouldn't bother even if you had the energy because it wouldn't touch the grief; at least, that's my experience.

What I will say is that you need to seek a doctor to catch your physical decline if you're already borderline anorexic at this early stage. I don't want to say anything cheesy like "otherwise, it's just a matter of time-- lean on your friends, look forward", but I can't think of better advice. I'm terribly sorry for the way you've been treated. Be well.

~ CC

Answer 4

Okay, it's time to pull yourself together and stop being a door mat and get pissed off. This guy is obviously a first class jerk and it's time you wake up to that fact. You need to be true to yourself and admit you made a mistake and learn from it and move on.

Next time, you take it slow and get to know him. I think this ex just wanted sex and moved on. How does that sit with you? I hope it makes you made as hell so you won't want to talk to him and move on and respect yourself. Stop making a guy your world, make sure they treat you well and dump whomever does not treat you like a princess.

Take care sweetie, this isn't the end of the world, believe me I have had several males in my life and learned a lot, sometimes the hard way, but I'm a fast learner, how about you? I hope you are.

Answer 5

There's always a grey area before and after a relationship where things happen like just being 'sort of' friends which often doesn't work. What you should do is keep out of his way and don't give him the satisfaction of being mean to you. Ignore him and work on improving yourself and being strong again and when he does see you again he'll see what he's missing. Then if he wants you back, refuse him. pick up the pieces and keep marching on and then you'll meet a new bloke and you'll think he's a hundred times better than the last one. You might not think that's possible right now but its an eternal truth. There's always someone else.

PS Robin's my favourite girls name.

Answer 6

dont react to him tomorrow - it makes him look like he has the upper hand - breaking up is very hard to do - and unfortunately MOST of us have had to go through this experience in order to make us emotionally stronger the next time we meet someone - just plod along with your emotions and let the tears fall, its going ot kill your heart to do it but take one day at a time. If you can, try and get out with some friends - go to a bar, or somewhere with lots of people around just to clear your head from the lonliness,

im sorry this has happened to you, its not easy, goodluck the pain will ease eventually and you will come out stronger from this,

Answer 7

Wulfrana - I hope youre not cracking onto Robin LOL ....... man that would be low.

Robin - pull yourself together girl. You will have forgotten about him in a years time if you get him out of your life completely. That means no phone calls nothing.

Just pull yourself together girl. Youve got 1 shot at this life. Make sure you use it well.

Answer 8

Please dont fret about this, obviously it wasn;t meant to be. As hard is it is too say you really need to move on and get your life back on track. You need to show to yourself and him its not going to affect you anymore. As hard as it is to hear you need to try and block him from your thoughts. Get rid off anything that reminds you of him. Day by day you will start to feel better. Start going out with your friends and start enjoying life again. The more time your on your own the more you will think of him - surround yourself with good friends and family this will make things easier for you to think about other things. It hasn't killed you so this will only make you stronger as a person. good luck to you I hope everything works out.

Answer 9

Go get your hair done buy some new clothes and put ona happy face, It must be painful but in time it will get easier. You show him it was his loss enjoy singledom easier said in done but in time you will apreciate it and prepare your self and your house for Mr Right he obviously wasnt you cant see that now but when you meet the right one you will wonder why you wasted your time, Its all just living and learning.

Chin up, go stick on a soppy film and cry all they tears away, tommorows a new day and we never know what it will bring .

Onward and Upward x

Answer 10

Reading that is like i am saying it myself, i know completely what you're going through, i am going through it too,

basicly what i have come to realise is that men are lying *****, who say they love you, and they always will, then all of a sudden have a change of mind, leave you out in the cold with no one, just because they 'dont know how they feel anymore' get angry and **** the bastard right off, you deserve better

Answer 11

Listen...I know you don't want to hear this. You WILL get over him. AND, quicker than you think. Have some faith in yourself. When you exude confidence and enthusiasm for life, people see that and respond to it. Don't let someone who obviously does not want to be with you, make you feel this way. Buck up...you will find the right person for you. It's not him. Just remember, have faith in yourself, love yourself, have confidence in yourself. You will find you will be much happier.