She has changed her colors at least three times, made the bridemaids changes dresses because she "has a visioin" of how she wants things to be and is already married to the loser, just renewing her vows. Should I tell her I'm just not feeling this whole thing anymore or suck it all up, spend my money on the hideous dress (which will probably change again) and just smile for the cameras?
I wasted 5 points on this question so please make the answers good ones
2007-07-04 04:31:26 · 22 answers · asked by Emgee 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I was in your position less than 6 months ago, except my sister was not already married. We had 3 months to plan the wedding. Every moment of free time for 3 months was resolved around my sister's wedding.
It is important to communicate with your sister. Let her know you love her, you want her to be happy and you want it to be perfect, but for her sanity as well as yours she needs to make decisions and stick with it. If you think the dress is hideous, let her know. 10 years from now, she may think so to when she is looking at the photos. See if you can convince her to maybe keep the same color and get a style dress that you can wear again in the future to some other event. When you spend at least $200 for a dress, you would like to wear it more than once.
It is time consuming, money consuming ( I spent over $1000), and exhausting but believe me it all pays off when you see your sister smile on that day.
2007-07-04 04:55:48 · answer #1 · answered by warriorandangel 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Whew! I have been given under pressure basically via examining all that. i will't even think of what it might desire to be like for you adult men. Weddings are this sort of loopy time and it is relatively hassle-free for relatives to get caught up in each and every thing and forget approximately approximately you. I advise sitting your fiance down and having a coronary heart-to-coronary heart. pass returned to the basics. communicate with regard to the type you have been the two happier once you knew what your plans have been and you have been compromising nicely. I advise forgetting the relatives for now. they're being ridiculous, obsessive, manipulative, juvenile and controlling. communicate on your fiance, make some minors plans, detect that pal who's an officiant and have your man or woman inner maximum ceremony (close friends and existence like relatives basically) i understand how complicated it is yet tell your respective households you like them yet you could no longer stand what they have made up of the marriage and the start up on your existence so as that they'd come to the marriage you have deliberate, sit down quietly, say each and every of the splendid issues and smile or they'd sit down at abode understanding it is your existence and you reside it your way. opportunities are high, your loved ones will see how stupid they have been and mellow out some. you additionally can elope. pass to Lake Tahoe (it is suited) discover somebody to marry you via a suited lake and then spend the week shacked up in a cabin interior the woods. sturdy success! I wish you the ultimate.
2016-12-09 00:27:18 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm guessing her actual wedding wasn't what she wanted, for some reason?
At any rate, do your best to be patient, but don't order that dress until the last minute! Be gentle with your sister, but you might want to quietly let her know that stressing everyone out isn't helping her or anyone else. Remind her to relax. She's already married.
And if she's demanding you buy multiple non-returnable hideous gowns and then changing her mind...put your foot down. You're not made of money.
2007-07-04 06:30:45 · answer #3 · answered by gileswench 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would recommend waiting till the very last minute to purchase the dress. This way there is less likelihood of her having a chance to change the dress again.
Or you could tell her that you are NOT hip to wasting hundreds of dollars on a dress that you would NOT be able to get a refund on should she change her mind again, and again, and again. Tell her it's unfair of her to expect you to do so.
Alternately, you COULD just say that this whole thing has gotten out of hand and you would much prefer to be an observer than a participant and that she needs to find a new person to fill your spot.
2007-07-04 04:41:26 · answer #4 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would excuse myself. It sounds like everyone is an enabler of her lack of manners and egocentricity. How rude to keep changing the dresses. but worse are the people who let her get away with it, no? Can you go tell her that you have neither the time, the money nor the patience for this drama . Then give her a huge hug and tell her you love her and wish her the very best happiness. ( wait do that in reverse order-meaning give the hug first!)
2007-07-04 08:15:56 · answer #5 · answered by barthebear 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What was her real wedding like? Did she have the big wedding, or was it more like a civil ceremony?
If her real wedding was a big deal (big party, lots of people, lots of celebrating, white dress, wedding party, etc.) then I think you should tell her how you’re feeling. Chances are if you’re feeling that way (and you’re her sister who someone who should be able to put up with it) then others are feeling that way too. Tell her politely that it feels like you’re always caught by surprise because everything has changed to often. Tell her that this shouldn’t be a big deal to her because she’s already experienced it before.
If her real wedding was more like a civil ceremony though, you’ve got to let her have this one just the way she wants it.
Good luck! I know brides can be a pain sometimes.
2007-07-04 04:40:17 · answer #6 · answered by quiet_hands 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Spend the money on the hideous dress but tell your sister she is driving you crazy and stick with one vision.
You two will still be sisters no matter what happens between her and the loser. Do this for her.
2007-07-04 05:15:44 · answer #7 · answered by no_frills 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's doing this and she's already married to him? How long? I don't think you need to go along with this for a vow renewal. This is excessive and let her buy your dress. It's her day so let her pay and give the dress back to her after the service. Good luck!
2007-07-04 04:41:23 · answer #8 · answered by realbohemian 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know you probably want to take the easy way out, but honestly, she IS your sister, so if I were you, I'd just stick it out. Just smile, nod, wear the stupid dress, and remember that in a few months it'll all be over, and one day (if you're not already married) she'll have to go through the same thing, and probably won't agree with all your choices either.
2007-07-04 04:43:29 · answer #9 · answered by meg 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What difference does it make how many times she changes the dress as long as you only have to pay for one? Now if she expects you to buy different dresses and return them or keep them because she's changed her mind, she's nuts. I wouldn't do it. Tell her to let you know when she's made her final decision and then you'll buy the dress, but not before. Also tell her that once you buy your dress, you won't be changing it for any reason since, bridesmaid dresses are not returnable.
2007-07-04 04:51:08 · answer #10 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋