Our vietnamese pot bellied pig made another homosexual attack on Mr Nuttle, an insurance broker.
Mr Nuttle was having a cup of coffee and explaining how a life insurance policy works when our pig suddenly mounted him. With Erics trotters over his shoulder and Eric panting in his face, Mr Nuttle was subjected to a thrusting attack on his lap which for reasons of good taste I will not describe. Eric weighs 150 pounds. I threw hot coffee on him, but in the heat of the moment he would not stop Afterwards my wife had to use a damp cloth to clean Mr Nuttles suit. We were so embarrassed.
Pope John Paul II said that animals have souls. That means they are capable of sin.
As Born Again Christians, we know that homosexuality is a sin.
I want Eric to give up his sinning.
Mr Nuttle said we should show Eric pictures of naked men and then hit him with a cattle prod.
Fellow Born Agains, please tell me how can we get Eric to go straight?
2007-07-03 10:43:19 · 24 answers · asked by Pastor Sauce 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Please do not delete this question: I need your help.
2007-07-03 10:44:30 · update #1
your animal has been hurt in the mind... i dont know what to do... and yes homosexuality is a sin, here comes the thumbs down...
2007-07-03 10:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by Luna Winter 7 · 3⤊ 4⤋
It appears that Gordon is suffering from Homobestiality. Before I continue, I want you to know that I am a Christian. I fully accept the Lord Jesus Christ as my personal savior. Unfortunately a priest can not help Gordon as pigs have no soul and are incapable of sin. I must admit, as a Christian I find it quite puzzling that Gordon, by virtue of his being created by God as a pig, is free to rut and cavort with boars, sows or the unfortunate trouser leg of an accountant and there seems to be no divine retribution for his actions. I find this unfair to human homosexuals. Just because I am not inclined to give or recieve a homo hummer, doesn't mean I can't empathize with those who are and ponder the unfairness of it all. Of course, if you consider that women are always saying men are pigs- then maybe it can be ok after all.
2016-05-17 10:47:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should video tape this, and send it to America's Funniest Home Videos. With the $10,000 prize money you can send the gay pig to a born-again degayifying facility.
I guess Eric the pig made a choice to be gay, huh? Was he imitating the master of the house?
2007-07-03 10:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by Becka Gal 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Pope John Paul II was wrong.
Half of these people aren't even reading the question. He's talking about PIG people!!!
2007-07-03 10:46:27 · answer #4 · answered by Yep! 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Don't believe everything the Pope says if animals had souls then wouldn't a lot of people be committing murder/homicide to animals? But I do believe homosexuality is a sin, it deals with not resisting temptation no one is born that way. E-mail me if you want Scriptures.
2007-07-03 10:49:17 · answer #5 · answered by Tito 2 · 1⤊ 3⤋
go get mr. nuttle a miss piggy and watch out for kermit the frog i hear he gets jumppy whaen some moves in on his bacon luv dad and homosexuilty will not inherit the kingdom of GOD... amen basic instructions before leaving earth bible
2007-07-03 10:54:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I wouldn't recommend torturing Him. If he wants to live in his sin, then that's his choice.
1 Corinthians 6:8-10 says, "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals,[a] nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God."
Romans 1:24-27 says, "Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.
For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due."
Just show your friend these verses, and if he refuses to change, then leave it up to God.
2007-07-03 10:49:57 · answer #7 · answered by Prayer Warrior 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
HomosexualityExplained.com
2007-07-04 10:51:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes it is God created Adam & Eve male and female
God didn't want male and male & vice versa. So to god Homosexuality is a sin, And No God does not hate *****
Homosexuality is a sin as well stealing,lying ect
its like saying god hates liars lol just a misunderstanding of Christianity and its basic teachings.
;)
2007-07-03 10:53:12 · answer #9 · answered by the great one 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
The Bible does not lie. It says a man shall not lie with a man.God made Adam & Eve .A man & woman is natural. God didn't start with 2 men or 2 Women . There would have never been any children, Please stop & think ,what seems natural!
2007-07-03 10:59:16 · answer #10 · answered by rufusmomphard 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋
That was TOO FUNNY ... I suggest you get Eric another 'gay pig' to have fun with, and leave him happily 'gay' ... and I am NOT going to say that he's a Gay ... because that's an oxymoron!
2007-07-03 10:47:27 · answer #11 · answered by Kris L 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋