My boyfriend got me pregnant without asking?

Question

I went out of my mind when I found out that I was pregnant a week ago.
I broke down about it when I told my boyfriend, and he admitted he had been poking holes in the ends of the condoms and hiding my birthcontrol pills from me.
He told me when we started dating 3 years ago that he wasn't interested in having kids, so why he did this makes no sense.
I care about him, but my trust in him is completely destroyed. I don't know if I should just break up with him. I need advice?

Answer 1

If your boyfriend was so desperate to give away his money. why didn't he just give it to everybody on this board?

Answer 2

First of all, if a man tells you he's not interested in having any children, then he shouldn't be having sex!! He should get himself fixed! Okay, secondly, if you don't want any children, then you shouldn't being having sex! You shouldn't be surprised that you got pregnant if you're having sex. If he's been hiding your birthcontrol pills, why didn't you call your doctor and ask for another sample of pills? Explain the situation to your doctor, do you think your man is the only man that does this stupid kind of behavior??? There's lots of men out there that are immature like this!!! You must have been wearing the hat that says" if we have sex we will never get pregnant ." And he's been when the hat that says" I'll make holes in my condoms to see if it's really true that if you poke holes in it then you can get your woman pregant!"
I have no sympathy for you! Nope none!
My suggestion to you, have the child, and if you don't want it -give it up for adoption.
As far as what to do with him- I'd keep him, it sounds like you're a perfect pair!!!Pat each other on the back!!
Sorry, there's no excuse on why there are so many unplanned pregancy in this world!! there's no excuse with all the information that's out there, you can't be so shocked when you get knocked up when you're having sex! This isn't 1950 anymore where the girl just goes away and nobody asks where she went, and everyone knows why she went away!!!
It's called being responsible with your body and your life!!!
Cry all you want it won't make anything go away, if anything you now know his true colors!! What a good fish you caught good job!!!

Answer 3

You should definitely tell him what's on your mind and the trust barrier has definitely been broken. He definitely doesn't deserve to get away with this!!

In the end though, it is up to you as to what you want to do with the baby. Keep it, not, put it up for adoption. He has no control over the final say when it comes to YOUR body!!

With all that said, i don't like how you just assume a guy would ask! Women get pregnant all the time without any asking happening. I mean, there are women ou there who purposely don't take their pill or whatever so that they will get pregnant.

Answer 4

That's a really tough spot to be in. It defiantly shows that you care for him, mainly because you have shot him yet!

Talk to him. Let him know how fu***d up this whole situation is, tell him how UN-cool it was for him to do that. Since ya'll have been together for 3 years, I'm sure the thought of children have crossed your mind a time or two.

Sit down and think about it real hard, if you decide to keep the child(which i hope you would) you must realize that he will always be a part of your life, not in the relationship sense, but for your child's sake.

I would still have to kick him in the gonads really hard, at least 3 times. One for every year he destroyed by one stupid night.

Just really search your heart, and see what it is that you need to do, not for yourself, but for your child. Now that you have to consider that, its gunna suck for a full minute, but whichever you decide, DO NOT LET HIM HAVE A SAY SO!

Hope everything works out for you. It's a very sad situation to be in. I'll pray for you!

Answer 5

Not only should you dump the man who manipulated and used you and treated you like an object, but you should make certain to call an attorney and find out what your options are. He is responsible for your child and will have to pay child support should you choose to have your child, even if you dumped him. If you decide to get an abortion, then he is responsible for your health and may even owe you damages for your mental anguish. I don't think you should take him back. This act was akin to rape. If you can't trust him to treat your body with respect, then how can you trust him to be a good boyfriend or husband of father? What he did was despicable. In any case, whatever you decide to do, I'd have that talk with an attorney. There are consequences for what your boyfriend did, and you should protect yourself. Good luck!

Answer 6

Your question doesnt even sound believable. Birth control pills are taken everyday so you should have noticed. If you did not notice that your birth control pills were disappearing, you are truly an idiot and your child is doomed.

But realistically you seem to need attention, mostly likely as a result from your daddy issues.... Which hopefully wont get passed on to your alleged kid, since his 'father' will be around right.... LOL

Answer 7

Wow...........what was he thinking???
Does he want to marry you? Do you two live together? When was the last time you two have talked about having kids?

I think what he has done is wrong on many levels. But would leaving him really solve anything? I guess if I where you, I would be mostly worried about what he plans on doing now. Also you need to think about what you are ready for.

He seems a tad bit immature if he couldn't just tell you that he wants children now. I would explain the obvious to him (that what he did was wrong....) tell him what you now expect, want and need from him. If he does not comply with you in all areas, then that's when I would consider leaving.
Just know that it is hard to raise a child on your own........but it IS doable!
Congratulations and good luck!

Answer 8

oh pity you silly girl!! didnt you ever learn that it's your own responsibility to make sure youre protected, now what if he happened to transmit something other than sperm, what would you say then? he didnt ask to contaminate your body. oh yeah right, he's poking holes in the condoms and hiding your bc. wow! youre obviously aware of all these things so makes me as an outsider wonder what your intentions are....

your body is a temple and you shouldnt be on this site playing around w/ silly statements like "without asking" are you even old enough to have sex? get a life and grow w/ it....

Answer 9

Girl this is crazy...I know it might sound weird, but he may have changed his mind about kids within the three years. You now have a child to worry and care for, and he can help build his trust back by helping you care for the baby, and your needs as well. I know your hurt cause it sounds like you weren't ready for this. Don't break up with him, try hard girl to make things work with him, because being a single mom is hard, but not impossible to do. He loves you you love him don't give up on ya'lls relationship, you two need to work together....

Answer 10

This is extremely low and selfish. If you are not ready to have a child this could not only affect your life badly but your child could be affected as well. If you have the baby, you are going to have to forgive him b/c he is the father of your child. But, I don't think you can ever fully trust him again. You never know what else he would do to get what he wants so be careful from now on. This is really scary!

Answer 11

First off how could you not notice you were not taking your birth control pills?
He is not the man you thought he was and what he did totally violates every code in the book of relationships. You need to figure out what you want, rather if you want to keep this baby or abort it. There is only one reason I can think of why he did this and is to get back at you for something or because he doesn't want anyone else to have you. This is wrong and he needs help and you need to reevaluate your life and what you want from this.