My boyfriend's mother & brother is living with us for the 5+ time HELP! Am I complaining for Nothing?

Question

I have been with my boyfriend for 8yrs. & we have 2children.I am a full-time stay-at-home-mom off & on for the 5yrs. My BF's mother can't hold down a job or apartment having her & her 17yr.old son continuously living with us in our 2bed/2bath. In the past she has 2x abandoned her son with us.Now, she has once again been evicted & has asked us if her son could stay with us for a couple of days & if she could bring a "couple" of things to our home(she was suppose to get a storage room also).Of course I said OK.Well, she didn't get a storage room & now my Apt. is a storage room & it's smells like one.The smell of their belongings is bothering me & so I mentioned that to my BF & he has the nerve to say "here you go complaining again" because the last couple of times she got evicted& had to live with us I was complaining & before they came this time I told him I have changed and I have. I don't mind them being here,it's just that their stuff smells & some of it is dirty clothes stinky socks

My boyfriend thinks that I am moving backwards & not forwards with my complaining because in the past we all (mother,brother,me &the BF) have gotten into many aruguments because I was tired of having people living in my home especially when they can do for themselves but choose not to because she has her oldest son (my BF) to take her & her son in EVERYTIME.Since I am a stay-at-home-mom I'm here ALL DAY(don't have a car).We are vegetarians & they are eating their meat out of my dishes & not washing them but leaving them overnight/days in the sink until I get to them I guess because after all I am a stay-at-home-mom.Today (07/03/07) she is to move out (didn't happen).She has 2microwaves,stereo in my childrens room, my closet packed, I can't open the front door all the way because she has more stuff behind it & not to mention her plastic trees, boxes, chairs & other stuff on my FRONT PORCH. Should I complain or just be thankful that I have a place to stay & a BF who works while I'm home?

I don't want them to leave (they have been here only for about 4 days) YET! I just want them to at least put their things away when they are finished with them, wash their dishes, throw their trash away & not leave it on my floor until I pick it up, wash their clothes especially their dirty socks since they are laying on my couch that now STINKS & I'm scarred to let my children sit on them because last time the got skin infections (boils) on their bodies. I really want their furniture and appliances out of my home period. In the past when I have complained about them to my boyfreind he would make it known to them that "I" was having a problem with them not cleaning and not him causing more tension in the home instead of just asking nicely for them to respect his home and clean up behind themselves.

WE are the ONLY family and place for them to go. They have no family and neither do we in this state (GA). His mom was suppose to go to a shelter to live and let them help her but I guess she changed her mind about that being that she do have a son who will take care of her. Oh, and did I mention my boyfriend is only 25 years old (me 26). We are to move in 6 months & I don't want them coming with us. His mom only looks for jobs at fast-food-chains ($6-$6.50 PER HOUR) & so she don't make much money & the money that she does make she spends. So unless my Boyfriend actually make her give him her check stubs so he can see how much money she is making and make her give him her money so that he can save it for her, she will be living with us until.... and my BF dosen't mind even if it was my family.He's that type of person who will help anyone for a long as they need. He told me to just be thankful. And I AM! and for those who were thinking about it, My moving out is not an option.

Answer 1

Ugh that is a nightmare. I would get them out of there as soon as possible!!!

Answer 2

This is a tough situation to handle. What I would do is remind your boyfriend that you are trying to be flexible and help them out by letting them live there. THAT is a sacrifice in itself. But you have expectations of your own! One of which is that they agreed not to keep all their things there. Don't let it bother you that your boyfriend reacts the way he does, because, YES, you are complaining, and you have a total right to! Tell him that you will agree to let them live there if they will find another place for their smelly things. That's NOT too much to ask!

Answer 3

WHAT A MESS ! SHE DOESN'T HAVE ANYWHERE ELSE TO GO? ANY OTHER FAMILY TO HELP YOU WITH THE BURDEN ? YOUR BF DOESN'T THINK YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO COMPLAIN? WHAT WOULD HE DO, IF YOUR FAMILY KEPT INTRUDING AND DISRUPTING YOUR FAMILY? ONCE, MAYBE TWICE, BUT 5 TIMES IS A LITTLE RIDICULOUS! GOOD LUCK!!