I'm in my mid twenties and have been dating my boyfriend for the past 3 years. Within the past two months, I've been starting to feel like I'm distantancing myself from him. I don't feel very connected to him sexually which is part of the problem, but mostly I just feel a lack of stimulation from our relationship as a whole. Overall he is a great guy and our future plans run parallel. he is aware of how i'm feeling, but the same issues always seem to come back up. How do I know if this is just a phase or if it's time to part ways. Is this one of those things that you work on and your relationship becomes more rewarding? Could this be a quarterlife crisis?
2007-07-03 08:02:05 · 7 answers · asked by lysa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There must be specific reasons you are feeling this way. Talk about each of the issues that make you want to distance yourself from him. (I mean the issues that keep coming back up) If the two of you can't resolve them to your satisfaction, it probably won't work out. If you are feeling this dissatisfied before you are married those "issues" will only get larger after marriage if you don't satisfactorily hash them out now.
2007-07-03 08:07:58 · answer #1 · answered by Barbara E 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maintaining any long term relationship requires work. I think you should picture your relationship as a marriage. How do you think you will feel in the marriage in five years? Ten years? Twenty years? The best long term relationships are based in deep friendship, and it sounds like you two might have that. Those early feelings of infatuation don't last forever, but the friendship does. You can't expect any relationship to stay as fiery as they are in the beginning. Can you commit to a long, loyal feeling of intense friendship? If you can, than it's definitely worth working on. Don't give up too quick, because you might be giving up something really special.
2007-07-03 08:11:40 · answer #2 · answered by leslie b 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is just a lull in the relationship. You can choose to work through it or start over again "in the field". Considering you get along otherwise and you share the same hopes for the future, you might consider trying to work through it.
Do something together you've never done before. Experiment with new things sexually. Take classes together.
If you are bored, than take the reins and make the relationship less boring =)
2007-07-03 08:09:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you find yourself becoming less and less attracted to him, in whatever way that may be, its either time to end everything, or for a break
i know from experience, i was in the same position as you. you can see yourself leaving, but at the same time you dont want to because your not sure whether you'll ever feel the same feelings, or be as comfortable with anyone else as you were with him. trust me, you'll find the same companionship one day
its hard to let go, you've got some thinking to do hun. try going out one night and doing something fun to see if any feelings spark back up. its worth a try
2007-07-03 08:08:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No worry! all relationships take that turn in life...you obviously love him or else you wouldn't still be with him..talk to him about your crisis. If you can't talk to him, than who can you talk to?
No one else is in your relationship, so have him sit down and talk to each other about your relationship! Your in your twenties, so enjoy it with him..show him that you still care for him and show him that the connection is fading. Than try new things with cooking, activities and even in the bedroom. It might be worth your wait!
2007-07-03 08:09:27 · answer #5 · answered by Lizzie Marie k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nope, its a real crisis, and sounds like you both grew roots and are afraid to leave.
2007-07-03 08:04:58 · answer #6 · answered by MAN ON A MISSION 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop wasting his time and let him go, he deserves that.
2007-07-03 08:05:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋