I fooled around with an ex this weekend, which isnt that big of a deal, but I have been dating another (great!) guy for a few months now. We are not exclusive, still just dating casually, but we are having sex. We have developed more feelings for each other over the past few months, and I think telling him about the night with my ex would blow everything out of the water. Am I obligated to tell him since he we are not "officially" boyfriend and girlfriend?
2007-07-03 06:56:29 · 29 answers · asked by taryn s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If he doesn't ask, you don't tell.
This is not his issue, it's yours. Don't burden him with what is your responsibility.
The fact that you aren't serious is all the more reason not to say anything. You're protecting his feelings.
I know there's going to be people saying to be honest and all that horseshit. Being honest is great, but you also have to keep him happy and protect his feelings....just as he needs to do the same for you.
Don't invite unneccessary drama in your relationship.
2007-07-03 07:02:05 · answer #1 · answered by MattVaill 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are only dating casually then why are you having sex? I wouldn't want to have sex if I was just in a casual relationship. If he's so great, why isn't he committed to you? And he's having sex with others as well? All of this is a very big deal. You need to see where and what your priorities are. You aren't obligated to tell anyone anything and neither is he. However, if I was dating someone and he was still dating other people, I wouldn't be having sex with him.
2007-07-03 07:06:23 · answer #2 · answered by Lioness 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you two are not exclusive then neither of you are obligated to inform the other about dates or sex with other people...however if that situation changes and you do become exclusive, it would be an issue if you kept seeing your ex.
However, ask yourself this...if this guy you're currently dating was really "all that" to you, would you have the desire to see or phuque others? Maybe the fact that you desired sex with someone else is a good sign to you that you're not as into dating-guy as you should be for things to ever become exclusive.
2007-07-03 07:00:48 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you know what the right things to do but the way I see it is to be completed truthful and honest if you want a trusting loving relationship but If you really love him and promised yourslef you would never do it agian and stay way from your ex and if you don't want to hurt him in the long run better then don't tell him and don't do it agian ask yourself why did you do it in the first place knowing it will affect your relationship? IT is because you want to be catch ? It may not be a big deal to most girl but when come to guy it a big deal to them fooling around it like cheating on them they will think you want to get back with an ex and they be like" You don't care about me anymore if you did you wouldn't do that to me" that what a guy would think trust me I been in the same situration and I lost the love of my life the guy I waited for 15 years . Good luck with everythings You don't want to end up losing someone great and regert what you did
2007-07-03 07:08:26 · answer #4 · answered by nuygen v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as you said He is your EX and may be you are not over him. if you are not over your ex then there is no way your new relationship can work. He have to make up your mind who you want to be with. has it ever cross your mind your ex is with you because he may be jealouse that you are moving on? Think about it !!! If you know you will never do it again with your ex then dont tell him but if you think it will be risky finding yourself in te same room as your ex then take some time off dating and sex and try to make up your mind. I cannot tell you what to do but i can advice you. IF you like this new guy then dont fool around with your ex ever.
2007-07-03 07:06:34 · answer #5 · answered by lolalinda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am sorry for saying this i dont see how two people can date and not be exclusive. seriously if i "dating" someone i am always straight up exclusive with that person from the start. but i guess if u two arent really dating i guess u dont have to tell him but i think thats kinda dumb to do stuff with your ex when this guy is such a "great guy" but ya
2007-07-03 07:02:30 · answer #6 · answered by Crazy ace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u said that fooling around with ur ex wasn't a big deal...so it didn't mean anything to u. but if u want to continue with the guy u r dating and probably want to be bf and gf in the future u shouldn't blow it by telling him about fooling around with ur ex. it happened...it didn't mean anything, then y risk ruining what u have with the guy u r dating? good luck!
2007-07-03 07:11:22 · answer #7 · answered by miss. sensibile 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I wouldn't, If your just starting a relationship and haven't told/asked each other for exclusivity then it might sabotage any chance for a relationship. However, if you really like your new man it;s a good time to start.
Good Luck
2007-07-03 07:06:59 · answer #8 · answered by Big Red 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you do not have to tell him.
But I think any man or woman would tell you that you probably need to figure out what it is you want.
Guess I am too old fashioned but you seem a bit too free spirited for me. I would not be having sex with someone unless I was committed to her
2007-07-03 07:00:33 · answer #9 · answered by Wolfithius 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your not obligated but if you feel guilty you should tell the new guy.
ive been in the same situation a few times actually and one time i kept it a secret and everything was cool but another time i told the new guy and it did mess things up a bit
he felt like i wasnt as into him as he was into me so it hurt his feelings and things got rough
what he doesnt know wont hurt him anyways
good luck :-)
2007-07-03 07:02:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋