Should I keep my promise?

Question

There was this guy that I really liked. And he asked me out, so I was really happy.But, the thing is after a couple of dates i saw that he's really mean and i don't like him at all!
i thought about braking up with him, but i reamembered that on our first date i promised to go to the dance with him. Should i keep my promise and go to the dance? or should i dump him?

Answer 1

Don't worry about the promise/guy/dance so much.

You should seek psychological counselling while you are still young.

Try to recover from whatever abuse you've endured that makes you feel obligated to endure MORE and further mistreatment and mental/emotional abuse.

Women's &Children's shelters nationwide are overflowing already,
So are Hospital ER's,Divorce Courts,and AlAnon meetings.

ALL with people who have been made to feel Obligated to take the abuse and mistreatment they get.
Or,,,who've been convinced they DESERVE being treated that way.

When any individual becomes unable to Distinguish a Toxic,Abusive relationship from a Healthy & Normal one,,,,and is willing to remain in a Hostile environment,,
It's Time for Professional Help


And when any such individual IS aware of what they're dealing with,,,,
but has ANY sort of notion that they somehow OWE
some opportunity to
their Tormentor~Mis-Treater ~Neglector~Abuser to CONTINUE inflicting their misdeeds,,

Then THAT's High Time to get some SERIOUS Proffesional help.

World is filled with predators who prey upon those who've been conditioned such as you.
The only defense against them is to be able to recognize them for what they are,,,
and have enough self-esteem to not be the ball that gets kicked around in their game

Best wishes for a good,solid recovery...
and hopefully someday you'll develop good Character Judgement skills and a rational,realistic self image.
And be able to have healthy interpersonal relationships and a normal life.

AS Confused as you are right now about what You Are,,
what you Deserve,,,
how long/how much you "OWE" any Abuser,,,

It REALLY IS possible to heal & recover & Enjoy Life without wasting Your Life wondering How Much of other people's
!@#% you are obligated to have shoved down your throat.

If you even comprehend any of this at all,,
I'm Certain you'll find it Offensive.
That's a stereotypical reaction common to all abuse victims.
Sorry,,,I hope you realize i do not intend it as offensive.

But the Instant you begin to heal,,,
You'll understand Clearly what I've said almost as if suddenly knowing a foreign language.

Go to YOUR dance.
Go alone if you must.
Dance All Night knowing you are RID of not only this particular little scumbag,,,,
but him AND the entire string of all others like him who you Refuse to allow into YOUR life.
Dance because Peace,Joy,Happiness are NEW Possibilities


Life gives NO Gaurantees that any of us will ever Find what we hope for.
But it DOES "gaurantee" that we can change the odds in our favour according to who we allow into our lives.
And who we DON'T.


**** If you STILL have Any Ethical Reservations about "breaking a promise",,,KNOW THIS.

In Any Test of "Agreement made in Good Faith",,,,
Your Promise has been made Null & Void
by the Persistent Actions of the 2nd Party .

The only action incumbent .upon You is to make this mean,disliked little boy you've been involved with Null & Void in YOUR life.


Take care

Answer 2

Girl ! Who has taught you that love and being fair can go together ? You did a promise to a nice guy, that you liked for what he was supposed to be... But he lied all the time. This guy is mean and you don't like him. So baby : you break up quickly and find another guy. There are so many fishes in the sea that u would be crazy to go on like this. He deserves what you gonna say : 'bye bye'. 'but you promised...'... 'yes, i know, it's not fair. But that's life. Don't insist. I lost attraction for you. Don't make me lose respect... And good point for you if you let a guy cos he's mean and doesn't match your standards. There is nothing wrong is being the master of one's life.

Answer 3

I wouldn't go to the dance with him if you don't like him and you're not gonna have a good time. The promise kinda implies that you guy would still be together at the time of the dance.

Answer 4

A promise is a promise.....unless the guy is a total jerk. If he's that mean, you have good sense not to want to go out with him..and you probably wouldn't enjoy the dance with him. Take someone you'll enjoy being with.

Answer 5

id finish him an say because i promised i will still go to the dance with u if you want. Aat the end of the day u have to try an keep a promise

Answer 6

If he is mean then you may be taking a chance of getting into a bad situation. He is the one who chooses to be mean so he would be to blame. Let him go so he can have enough time to find another date to the dance.

Answer 7

it depends. How much longer to the dance? a few weeks, dump him. a few days, keep the promise but have a friend tag along to keep an eye on him. Make it a double date for your protection.

Answer 8

well going to a dance with someone and dating them are two different things. Tell him you dont feel like the two of you are compatible, and you are really unhappy with where you're seeing it going. Tell him you wont date him anymore, but you're willing to still go to the dance with him since you promised.

Chances are after getting let down by you, he wont even want you to go to the dance with him, so you wont have to break your promise, but you wont have to o out with him either.

Answer 9

Your word is your bond but if this guy is mean and perhaps even violent then by no means should you go to any dance with him because you don't want to lead him on because his reaction might not be good

Answer 10

umm keep the promise Or if you think he is a jerk dump him at da dance but if hes not a jerk just wait tilll the day after. [ unless hes a jhon Tucker] Lol jp =D