My daycare provider has been acting very weird lately. I've had my 2 kids there for about 2 years now. We had always gotten along very well, and were friends, we would all hang out together, get together for coffee, dinners etc.
The last couple months, she's been acting weird. Barely talks to me when I'm dropping my girls off. The kids tell me they don't do much there anymore either. She sits by the tv with the smaller kids, and the older kids do their own thing.
They have been tighter financially, as her common-law's hours have been cut.
Now, she's telling me she needs to charge "full rates" for the daycare, which will be $100 more per week! These "rates" are well above the going rate with anyone else in the area (I've checked) I could have the kids in fully structured and active daycamps for the price she wants. These prices are to go into effect in a week.
Am I overreacting, or should I just go with this.
2007-07-03 03:46:39 · 8 answers · asked by LMH 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
My kids are 10 and 6.
I know my husband will want to pull them from her care, but I don't know what to do.
I feel I owe her, because she's my friend, but would friends take advantage of me this way?
2007-07-03 03:47:42 · update #1
She was my friend, but I don't even know if I could say we still are. Everything out of my mouth, she challenges and argues with. She is always right, smarter, better. It drives me crazy, but I don't think it's worth arguing over.
I try to talk to her, but she won't. She'll change the subject or ignore me completely.
She's been quite rude with certain comments, but I brushed it off as I didnt want to argue in front of the kids.
2007-07-03 04:05:50 · update #2
I probably could afford the extra $100, but it would make it tight, and I really don't think it's worth it. That's a lot of money... we'd be looking at $1200 / mo +
Thats a lot of money for not a lot of services.
2007-07-03 04:07:23 · update #3
Well, she sound depressed to me. If she is a friend, why don't you ask her if you can help her out because she seems so blue? Maybe the money thing really has her down. In which case, you as her friend ought to be glad to help however you can, even if it's not financially.
Regarding the rates, I think it's fine to be frank and say your've very sorry but you're not in a position to pay more than X a week. Ask her if you can work something out, because you'd like the kids to stay with her, but you have to stay within your own budget.
2007-07-03 03:52:54 · answer #1 · answered by sparki777 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only good thing about keeping the kids there is continuity. Big changes can really affect kids. However, it doesn't sound like she's really taking care of the kids. If she's just watching TV all day, she's not doing much for them. If her attitude is bad, she's probably hurting them. Kids can sense it. On top of that, if you can't afford it, you can't afford it. Period. If you can afford it, why would you pay more for less? You're kids could really be learning and growing instead of sitting around watching tv.
Your first responsibility is to your kids, not your friend. Find another sitter or put them in a structured daycare.
2007-07-03 11:00:34 · answer #2 · answered by MJ3000 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should put them in fully structured active day camps. It's so much more fun than sitting around someone's house anyway.
Last year, my daughter was in beach camp. They went to the beach twice a week, went on a field trip (theme park or sports event) once a week and played games at the center the other 2 days. It was less expensive than the home daycare my son was in (he was too young for the program) and tons of fun.
It's sad when a friendship changes, but if you can get your kids into an affordable and fun program, everyone will be happier.
2007-07-03 10:54:41 · answer #3 · answered by ryet_grrrl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get your kids out of there, and get them into a different healthy environment! You aren't paying to have your kids "watched" by a depressed person watching daytime tv! If she won't talk to you- how do you know your kids are SAFE?? You owe your kids a safe AND educational environment- you owe your friend nothing as far as your kids go. You have enough red flags! Put your kids in a reputable daycare center/ summer camp, or with a mother that you trust completely- who follows a healthy, educational activity schedule. You may be able to work out your relationship, but take your kids out of the equation. It is not their issue whatever is going on with this woman...Don't subject them to it!!
2007-07-03 10:57:22 · answer #4 · answered by quirky 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can still be her friend and not have your kids in her daycare. Just tell you simply cannot pay over the going rate. Seems it is not the best enviroment for your kids lately and that is even more important than a friendship. You can still reach out to her even if your kids aren't in her care. I would still try and be her friends but remove my kids. Just my thoughts on it. Good luck!
2007-07-03 11:21:00 · answer #5 · answered by Dutchess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she is taken advantage of you however, I think her business is in trouble and she needs help. She may be depressed and not know really what to do. She may feel ashamed for raising your rate. Tell her you can not afford it and you are thinking about moving the kids. If she is a true friend she will understand. As should you.
2007-07-03 10:56:40 · answer #6 · answered by bjaymart 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her. Try and find out what's wrong because it is affecting the day care. If you can't get a reasonable answer, you might just have to pull your kids. Sounds to me like there is something serious going on for her.
2007-07-05 19:38:19 · answer #7 · answered by Ophelia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would pull my kids out and send them to the fully structured day care. It sounds as if your day care provider is depressed and not caring much about her work anymore.
2007-07-06 20:54:18 · answer #8 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋