When I was about 5 yrs old I was molested by an outside family member. I told on him and it was stopped and I was removed from the situation immediately.
I'm 19 yrs old. I've never felt completely comfortable around guys. I'm attracted to them, but I never want to make the effort to be in a relationship for reasons I don't understand. I self-doubt a lot and I tend to like guy who'll never like me back.
I know that this type of trauma can cause a person to shy away, but I know other women who've been hurt like that at a young age and they have no trouble jumping into a relationship with a man.
What's wrong with me and how do I overcome my fear of relationships?
2007-07-02 18:58:34 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
Marti, why don't you use counseling? Over time the deeper things surface and can be addressed, undone. Please contact a family counselor.
2007-07-02 19:03:11 · answer #1 · answered by Zeera 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, there is NOTHING wrong with you. You have a reason for feeling this way. Talking about is the first step. Seek out a form of counselling that you feel comfortable with. One on one psychotherapy or maybe a group of women focusing on sexual abuse therapy. You deserve a healthy sex life, please don't let fear and inhibition stop you from seeking the help you need to get what every human deserves. Love, intimacy, security and trust are the feelings a healthy relationship encompasses. And you will have all of things if you work towards them. Now go for it !!
2007-07-03 02:16:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Therapy may help. This is a very traumatizing thing to have gone through at such a young age, and it's no suprise you feel uncomfortable getting into an intimate relationship with someone. You need to find someone that respects you and will take things at the pace you want to take them at. Talking to a professional is a good idea and while it may never help you get over the violation from when you were little, it will probably help you to get past it and proceed into a healthy relationship.
Good luck.
2007-07-03 02:04:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First things first! I want to say I'm really sorry you had to be one of the millions of girls to experience molestation. We have a lot of sick f#cks on this planet. I would be more than happy to cut their penises off of them if it were legal. Unfortunately the legal system doesn't get it! Second of all I would recommend you see a professional with this problem, they can help you understand how to cope. And last of all you say your Friends have no problem jumping into a relationship.
When you jump into anything this big (like a relationship) shouldn't you give it some thought, as apposed to just jumping in? Are you sure that they are doing the right thing?
2007-07-03 02:16:20 · answer #4 · answered by K.B. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ur still young and healing will come with time. In fact your healing a bit now by simply posting this question. The more comfortable are with talking about it the more healed you become. Be patent with yourself. Part of your shyness is your age so let it all happen naturally. I know because I've been there.
2007-07-03 02:09:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Like everyone else was saying, the most helpful thing that you can do for yourself would be to go and speak to a counselor to help you deal with the issues that you have and help you heal moreso.
2007-07-03 02:07:45 · answer #6 · answered by kristina807 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all report this to the police there is no time limit on it . second get help throught counceling it wasnt your fault this happened to you all men arent like that one who did this to you good luck and god bless . you my opion?
2007-07-03 02:04:27 · answer #7 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋