My son will be 5 on Wed and uses a pacifier to fall asleep at night sometimes..?

Question

He uses it about 3 nights a week and falls asleep in 5 minutes. About 5 minutes after that I go in and take it and he doesnt notice. I am throwing it out the day after his birthday because we agreed he is too old for it. I feel bad taking it from him because I know it soothes him and it really isnt that big a deal to me if he has it 10 minutes out of the day. Am I wrong to take it from him?

I want to make it absolutely CLEAR that my child does not walk around with the pacifier in his mouth. It is only at night a few nights a week at bedtime for 10 minutes tops. Also- he goes to the dentist every 6 months and has no damage to his teeth. Please keep that in mind. thank you

Answer 1

Think about the reasons to get rid of it?
Is it causing his teeth harm? Not 5-10 minutes a day. Is it causing stress to him, no. Is it causing any ill effects? Doesn't sound like it.

If you and he agree he is too old, I suggest you find a nice way to take it away. Send it up to the "pacifier" fairy and leave a gift under his pillow that night. Tell him they need it for little babies.

Good luck with your decision.

Answer 2

If it is only until he falls asleep at night then who is it hurting? I am very sure that with a 5 yr old boy that there are other things that are more important than falling asleep with a pacifier.

If it is only a few nights a week I would leave it alone. But if you have already agreed with your son that he is too old I wouldn't just throw it out. I would get a box of some kind that he can keep on his night stand or dresser and tell him that you would be really proud if he kept the pacifier in the box but if he needed it once in a while that it wouldn't bother you.

I did this with my daughter at 3 and when we moved when she was 12 I found one in 3 different drawers.

Good luck and follow your heart!

Answer 3

A pacifier isn't going to damage his teeth, a few minutes to sooth him to sleep is not doing him any harm at all. I have a very good friend who is a pediatric dentist and when my daughter had her pacifier and everyone was trying to take it away he told me that it is NOT pacfiers, thumbsucking, fingersucking that causes "mishapen" mouths it is GENETICS. If someone in the family had bad teeth there is a chance the child will. Esepcially if his/her parents wore braces. Neither of my neices were allowed pacifiers yet they both had to have braces from 7th grade until their senior years of highschool...both my sister and her husband wore braces as teens. I never wore braces, neither did my daughter's father, my daughter had her pacifier until she was almost three, has never had a problem with her teeth she is now 21 years old. Never had a cavity, never had braces.

Answer 4

Personally, I decided when my son was about 12 months that I didn't want him to have his pacifier anymore. But I think my decision was based on the fact that socially many people look down on an older child having a pacifier. If he only uses it to go to sleep then what harm is it doing? It's no different than a child who won't go to sleep without his/her favorite stuffed animal or beloved blanket. Let him keep it if it makes him happy and helps him to get to sleep and don't worry about listening to everyone else.

Answer 5

He is a big boy. If you think he is going to have a hard time with it you should encourage him to give it away. Tell him that there are a lot of new babies being born that need pacifiers, and since he is a big boy now its time to send all his old pacifiers to the the new babies in the hospital. Let him put all his pacifiers in a big envelope, fill out the address (your moms or something), and have him help you write a letter to the babies telling them that he doesnt need them anymore because he is a big boy. This way he knows they are gone, and will probably be happy about giving them to the new babies.

Answer 6

Give him something else to soothe himself with-- take him to the store and let him pick out a toy/stuffed animal (within reason-- maybe you should pick 2 or 3 and let him choose from those) and tell him he's such a big boy now that you're ready to let him trade in his binkie for a big boy toy! If he has multiple pacifiers, let him cash each one in for a small big boy treat! Then at night, or whenever he would regularly use his pacifier to soothe reiterate the new big boy toy. "Okay off to bed, do you have your big boy stuffed bear all ready? Good!" And if he cries for his pacifier back, calmly and firmly tell him that it's too late, he traded them in and you've already given them to a younger child who needs them more than he does. Be firm! you don't want your child marching off to kindergarten with a pacifier in his mouth do you? Plus it can stunt verbal skills! Be strong you can do it!!

Answer 7

I am torn on this. My son is 3 with a night time paci and I get told he is too old. I feel kids have the right to comfort themself, so maybe you can take it away from him gradually and explain to him why, make it seem like a big boy mission, with a reward, etc, as a project for you both rather than a big sudden no-no.

See how he goes, if he really can't settle, give it back to him, I doubt he will still have a paci at college, and he may well find another way to comfort himself soon enough. My son goes right to this thumb if his paci isn't to hand and we can't exactly chop that off! ;)

Answer 8

Alright -- people seem to have missed that he is NOT walking around in public sucking on a binkie. He's got it at night. I did the same as you...my daughter NEVER had one ever in public. Even as a baby, she didn't. She actually started having it from my mother during the day. So, then she wanted it to sleep. Didn't bother me a bit, she's sleeping and it falls out anyway. One day, I just threw it out. She actually chewed it up a bit - not enough to fall off. But, as soon as I noticed it was ripped a bit, I tore it more and made a big deal about it being broken. And she couldn't possibly use it broken, so that was the end.

I would NOT tie it to his birthday (just in case he gets upset you don't want him to associate it with his b-day).

Answer 9

I personally think it should be taken away, even if he just uses it at night. I have a son that it 5 and i can't imagine him needing a pacifier to go to sleep, but he's your child and if you have no problem with him having it then let him have it.

Answer 10

My parents told me about a "pacifier fairy" (like the tooth fairy). I put my pacifiers under my pillow, and when I woke up there were presents in my room! A stuffed animal, barbie house, or something. This is something my parents said I wasn't aloud to do until I was a certain age, so I was looking forward to it. Then he is happy, and calm still because he knows what happened to it.