I am a sixteen year old girl and I don't believe in sex before marriage, but I've noticed that many men seem to prefer a woman that is not a virgin. But some men seem to be really attracted to a woman that is a virgin, and are more persuing. Then society potrays virginity as something of up most value, while on television they are constantly airing commercials about birth control and condoms. I'm kind of confused about men now in how their mind works.
2007-07-02 10:36:06 · 24 answers · asked by R.S. 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
both..
2007-07-10 10:20:47 · answer #1 · answered by Felix 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The whole thing about some guys wanting to get with a virgin is strange. I remember when I was younger that some guys wanted to be the 'first' and I always thought it was something about ownership and being the 'only' man. I also thought that it also reflected some insecuirty since she would not be able to compare with other guys. Also, in most of these cases it was not about a girl being a virgin until marriage, just about havig her before everybody else.
Personally, I never wanted to be with a virgin (and as I got older it became less of a issue, since there are many fewer vrigins around once you hit your twenties...), because I think it potentially involves too much drama and waiting with sex just for the sake of waiting. Without putting down somebody that has never had sex, I do prefer a woman that has experience and knows what she wants and also knows how to please a man. I would think that this would require some practice, so I stay away from virgins. In addition, when you get much older, in my opinion it is kind of strange that somebody has not had sex, and as a guy you wonder why. It is similar to the concerns that a lot of women voice regarding single guys in their early thirties (Why is he still single? What is worng with him such that is not taken?), and their is some valid points in thinking that way.
Having said all this, I believe that both men and women should wait to have sex until they really fall in love the first time, and since you are only 16, there is nothing wrong with being a virgin (I was 18 when I had sex the first time). If you want to wait with sex until marriage, that is your decision, but obviosuly not something that I would personally think is necessarily a good thing. However, to each their own...
Also, I am not sure what 'society' that you talk about that would put virginity as such a high value item? Certainly not in the US, unless you are talking about some religious fringe groups.
2007-07-10 05:34:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a virgin, I prefer a virgin! I'm not really a virgin by choice; it's just that I never met the right woman. But if I'm in a relationship for the long haul, I would love to lose it to a virgin woman.
I can't speak for non-virgin guys though. The mentality might be slightly different. That's probably why you're confused about men and their minds. How our minds work depend on our personalities and our circumstances.
2007-07-02 10:39:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i can understand the whole no sex before marriage thing and if that's what you want to do then do just that!i had sex before being married which i'm still not married and sometimes i wish i would've waited b/c truth be told,i didn't even enjoy sex when i first did it!now i think men like girls who aren't virgins b/c they have a little more experience than virgins.then you have those that like it tight!seriously speeking though,some men are insecure and they think that a virgin will not know if they aren't big enough or if they perform well!guys are full of it!they sometimes will take any thing they can get be it a dog cat horse or what the hell ever else!
2007-07-10 10:04:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When guys look for girls, the search depends on what they're interested in. If the guy is looking for a fun time, most often he will look for someone who's open for anything and willing to go crazy. But if the guy is looking for a long lasting relationship, often they go for untainted innocence, they want something they know can be theirs and only theirs. Virginity itself is not the issue, it is the girl's correspondence to the guy and how they relate. It is in the genetic makeup of men to try to have sex, that is a plain and simple fact. What a man searches for depends on the man, all men cannot be stereotyped into being sex driven pigs. As for your being sixteen, I am seventeen and have been in a relationship for almost a year. I'm a virgin and so is my girlfriend, but sex is always on our minds. Most guys in our age bracket are driven by sex, but it is possible to find good guys who don't have to have it.
2007-07-10 06:12:49 · answer #5 · answered by ben c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hunny, i am in the same boat!!!!! i am a sexteen year old girl as well! i don't believe in sex before marriage either! guys that want a non-virgin just want an easy lay!!!! guys that are pursuing a virgin just want to break the ice and try to get them in bed, well, most of them! some may just really like having a girl with standards! keep your morals!! don't give in just cause on tv you see commercials for birth control and condoms! if you have made a promise to yourself that you wouldn't, then DON'T! you will regret it in the end, i PROMISE!!! a guy that really loves you will be willing to wait for marriage!!! im not just sayin these things cause i can and cause i want to tell you what to do, i am tryin to help you. and coming from a girl who is in the EXACT same place you are with the same thoughts, you should take this one to heart. babe, there is nothing worse then the feelin of "giving" yourself to someone and then having to turn around the next day and say "what did i do??"!!!! trust me! i made that mistake after years of promising myself that i wouldn't have any sort of intercourse before marriage! i screwed that up! but i am what they like to call a born again virgin, cause i woke up that next morning and said to myself "what the hell did you do alex? why did you think he would be "the one"? why would you give into him when you know you will most likely never see him again!!!!????" and that is something i have to live with everyday for the rest of my life, but because of it i have been able to be a better judge of what is right and wrong! and i am not sayin that sex is wrong, i am saying that goin against yourself and your morals is wrong! trust me babe! and if you wanna talk more about it let me know! fefedobson09@yahoo.com i will be happy to talk to ya more! hope i helped! =] good luck sweetie!!!!!!! <3~..alex..
2007-07-10 09:44:21 · answer #6 · answered by ..alexandra_kelsey.. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A man with good moral charicter, will accept either! Same goes for the lady. I told my son at his age of fifteen that I would not lie to him about sex. I told him that it was very wonderfull and great, when two have joined together in a common cause for making love! He should first remind himself that it was a ADULT responsibility!!! He should not be pressured into it by peers, or girlfriend(s)! For that a couple of hours of enjoying love making could create a life time of something that both of them may not have been what they realy wanted. Make your career first, and by all means two should share the responsibilities of sexual activity! I reminded him of this talk severial times before he graduated from college.
2007-07-02 11:01:12 · answer #7 · answered by need2knowalot 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can never go wrong by being a virgin. I am a virgin. If a guy doesn't like you because you are, forget about him. Wait and the one that will appreciate your sacrifice will come along. I admire your choice. I am so proud of you. Email me sometime if you want.
2007-07-02 10:41:19 · answer #8 · answered by reenaay77 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
good for you girl,and your beliefs,men prefer virgins,i was silly and lost mine drunk,you want to make it special.as an older lady heres an incite to men,when there alone and thinking about what they really want in life and who they want to be with,its a clean cut virgin,now the difference is when there in the pub with there mates bragging about sex and ****,its allways the experienced woman they prefer,but its just a load of rubbish,everyones different and likes different things,youll find someone special who will love you just the way you are,virgin or no virgin,just dont go losing it because you think men will prefer it,cause like many of us,we badly regret it,so good for you and stop worrying about wat others think
2007-07-10 09:55:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Virgin Mary. Only your kids can tell someone your not a virgin, oh and your nether region. Virgins are best tho
2007-07-10 10:17:32 · answer #10 · answered by Bohn F 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys would settle down and marry a virgin in a heart-beat.
Promiscuous girls are less of a challenge and they don't have to invest much just to have sex.
I think they will value you more and put you on a pedestal in their mind if you hold on to your goodies.
2007-07-02 10:54:21 · answer #11 · answered by Missy S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋