2007-07-02 09:59:49 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you're not ready let your partner know. You can tell him you're not ready now but will be one day.
2007-07-02 10:02:33 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're not ready for marriage, you need to let your partner know. If you think you're doing him/her a 'favor' by not telling them so you can avoid 'hurting their feelings', you're not. You're actually letting them live a lie. You're not being honest (which is pretty much lying) and you're wasting their time if they're expecing a marriage soon.
It's perfectly normal to feel unsure about 'forever', but if you truly love your partner and want to be with him/her, you need to ask yourself whether or not you truly want him/her forever. If you do, then marriage isn't something to fear. If you're not sure your partner is "the one", then you have to be willing to accept that your partner may not want to wait around until you figure out who is "the one". If you want to marry your partner, just not immediately, let them know how much you love them and that you want to marry them, but you'd like to be married in a few years as opposed to immediately. If it's truly love, you'll work it out and come to an agreement. If one of you doesn't love the other enough, then you won't be able to make a compromise and it's better to end it now than to drag it on for nothing. You both deserve better than that. So, just be honest. It'll be far better to be honest now than to drag your feet. Believe me, you'll regret it in the long run.
2007-07-02 10:09:37 · answer #2 · answered by lys 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with your partner and let them know that at the present time you are uncertain or not ready to take the plunge. Don't try and fool either yourself or your partner into believing that marriage will make things alright. You sound mature enough to be able to be honest and this is very positive. Best of luck with this.
2007-07-02 10:04:35 · answer #3 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, sit down and think about why you're not ready and write it down so you will be able to prepare to explain to your partner about why you're not ready. After that, build up your courage and try to tactful about bringing up the conversation. What you wanna do is find out how your partner feels about the "deadline" and about "status" of your relationship. And you also want to know in subtle way if you can stall for more time and think on this gigantic step.
Also, thinking about it and writing down how you feel and why you need more time will help you prepare for what you REALLY want to say. Do you really want to get married to this person? Or, do you have other plans? So, you need a little more time to think on this thing - maybe.
But maybe you don't feel this person is the one for you? If not, don't waste his or her time. And don't keep wasting yours. But be 100% sure about what you wanna do.
2007-07-02 10:14:40 · answer #4 · answered by mo2dajizzo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Decide what drove you to make this promise. If you are not honest with yourself, you will suffer in the future. Try to reason with your partner in understanding your need for evaluation. Be more honest with your promises. Promise your self first. Promise yourself that you will be honest with yourself. If you put one foot in a fast moving river, be prepared to be washed away. Better to be dipping into a lake, where you can see the ripples and their affect on the surrounding environment.
2007-07-02 10:06:57 · answer #5 · answered by tmea 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you and your partner are serious enough to get married then your partner should understand that you might not be ready for this big step in life. Just talk to them.
2007-07-02 10:03:10 · answer #6 · answered by x-x-x-x-x 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to be completely honest with your partner. IF that is the way you feel, than you need to say it, eventhough it might hurt them. IT is best not to keep them hanging. IF you think you would be ready to marry them one day, then tell them that. Say I am not ready now, but one day I do see myself with you. Dont stay in a relationship because of guilt.
2007-07-02 10:02:43 · answer #7 · answered by missadvice411 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your partner the truth, give them the reasons why you are not ready. If they are really meant for you they will understand and give you time.
It depends on why you're not ready I guess but you the biggest thing here is to TALK about it.
2007-07-02 10:03:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Errr....you promised and now you're not ready? Maybe you should talk to your partner about this. Don't get married if anyone of you have doubts.
2007-07-02 10:32:27 · answer #9 · answered by Borneo Babe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell them before you guys get married. Just tell them the way your feeling and explain to them that you would rather be honest with them now rather than telling them when your already deep into the marriage. Its just like ending a relationship, its better that it happens sooner rather then later when Strong feelings have developed.
2007-07-02 10:05:49 · answer #10 · answered by California Kush 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋