Women, how do you sit there and listen to it?

Question

being in church and listening to an almost irate preacher talk about "women must be submissive to their husbands", and hearing that men should be the "head of the household"?
How can this "man as head" thing even work if two ppl arnt willing to work together? make sense to you?HOw many women honestly live in marriages were the two of them make it work, as equal partners?

Answer 1

Men are commanded to love their wife as Christ loved the church. How much better can that get?

Answer 2

Equality is a pipe dream under any circumstances. So no, there is no way to honestly live in marriage and everything be "equal" or "fair". That is what twenty-somethings perpetuate in their minds to justify an expensive wedding . . . the happily ever after theory. The truth is a man will be a man and a woman will constantly feel the need to prove her worth. The men who are on the same playing field with their wives (cooking, cleaning, working) are referred to as henpecked by their peers. The women who are able to not work and rear the home life are considered lazy or given the matronly soccer mom title. There is no win-win - someone is always going to get the short end of the stick. Both me and my spouse work and we have kids, we own our home and drive fairly nice cards. However, I still do the cooking, cleaning, and rearing - while he washes cars and mows the lawn. I went into the relationship proudly waving my degree as testament to my independence and letting him know I would not be barefoot and pregnant cooking and cleaning for him . . .so much for that!

Answer 3

When I first became a Christian eight months ago, my husband had a HUGE problem with it. He tried to stop me from participating in a women's Bible study once a week, and from going to church on Sundays.

Many of the women in my Bible study, including the pastor's wife, tried to tell me that I had to "submit" to my husband's will. That's when I kindly reminded them that right after that, it says that men are supposed to respect and honor their wives.

I won't listen to a pastor who doesn't have an idea of how a Godly marriage is supposed to be. A husband and a wife ARE supposed to work together. The husband should love and respect his wife, and honor her in everything he does. At the same time, the wife is supposed to honor her husband, and submit to him so long as what he requires does not compromise who she is physically, mentally, or spiritually. NEVER in the Bible does it say that a woman is supposed to be controlled by her husband.

A marriage is defined by mutual respect. I've respected my husband's decisions in everything, except for me attending church. I REFUSED to back down on that. As a result, my husband now supports me in my choice, even if he's still not a Christian himself.

And THAT is Biblical.

Answer 4

I would like to know what religion this irate preacher is and then I would like to show him the scripture where God said that He created woman to be mans helper and companion so that he wouldn't have to be alone for the rest of his days. Also, they were created to populate the world and I am one of the mass of women who would gladly let the man take over the gift of childbirth. The word submissive is too often taken and twisted to suit an individuals desires not what God meant. Notice God never said a woman was to be a slave nor was anyone else.

Answer 5

If you're sitting in church and listening to that drivel , you need a new church. I can just about guarantee that your minister never attended a seminary. There's an awful lot of people who will twist the Bible to their own ends. They used the same type of preaching to keep slaves in line. Slaves, obey your masters..... I've been married 38 years, and I would not tolerate bad treatment. If you abuse me, then, honey, you lose me. But, we haven't has a problem because my husband doesn't need to boss me around. we're equals. I have things I'm better at, he has things he's better at. Is this a traditional church, or one of the newer charismatic churches? I think I'd try a new church.

Answer 6

Being an independent woman who so happens to be married is hard. I hesitated when I took my vows because they said "Obey" who that was a hard word to hear. But the man is the head of the household, it doesn't say in the Bible that women where not able to have any input in what happens in that household. We are supposed to obey our spouses but not if he is leading us in an unholy path. It never said that we had to give up who we are as women to be what our husbands want us to be. It just says that the man is supposed to make the money and head the household. But a woman still has a say in her life and the life of her family. Many people mistake this passage as the women losing herself and her free will to become her husband's property...NOT!!!!!!!!

Answer 7

Hello. My husband and I are both Christians. We have been married approaching 7 years and have a powerful relationship. Being "submissive" does not mean that I am a door mat. I am a strong-willed, intelligent woman who understands that my place under my husband is not one of cruelty, but one of kindness ordained by God because my husband tends to me, leads me, listens to my view, but the end decision is all his to make and he will have to answer for it before the Lord. Why? Because he is the priest of our home and he is to teach and guide his family in the ways of the Lord. The reason for this is because Adam failed at guiding Eve in the ways of the Lord. God told Adam first and he still went ahead and ate the apple. For this reason is why the Lord holds man so greatly accountable. But my own personal sins are mine to answer for.

Answer 8

It does not mean that women have no controll at all, which is a common misconception. Try this:

1 Chorinthians 7:4
A wife does not have authority over her own body, but her husband does. Equally, a husband does not have authority over his own body, but his wife does.

In fact, if your interested 1 Chor. 7:1-7 have about priniples of marriage.

Answer 9

I dont listen to it. In HS the priest told an entire class that the women (in the class) should grow up, get married, have as many kids as possible and listen to their husbands in all things.

I raised my hand calmly told him that until he grew a uterus to shut the hell up, cause I am submissive to no man. I got detention.... then the Dean of Women told me to skip detention cause the priest was "a sexist pig".

Answer 10

Well, I am the head of the household in our family, because I am the one with the money managing skills...even though he makes more than I do. But we split the responsibilities right down the middle, and we rarely have an issue. Rarely even an argument...except little cute ones.

Answer 11

I have one of those marriages where it works, but it took some "working at it" since my father raised 4 daughters under his false belief that women are on earth for men.
It takes lots of forgiving and re-training of myself AND my husband. It is TAUGHT incorrectly, and if you want your marriage to work as God intended which is "in harmony and for the betterment of each individual. Marriage is a ministry to each other and the "union" is greater that two. It is a covenant with God and therefore a triangle with God at the top and it's still not 1+1+1=3; it is 1x1x1=1..., whole and complete and the strongest ONE ever; not a 'single-one'. See?
Man "shouldn't" be head of the household. He IS "head" and that doesn't mean BOSS and RULER, it means he is responsible and accountable to God for himself and his wife and his family spiritually, financially, relationally, emotionally, and every other way. NO man could do that without going to God and LISTENING faithfully to Him and honoring God and SUBMITTING to His lead.
Now, as far as the wives being subject to and submitting to their own husbands, that is no problem when a man loves his wife the way Jesus loves the church and gives himself for her! If you are FIRST and honored and cared for even at the expense of His needs and to the point that he was willing to DIE to make you glorious; submission is no problem. Being subject to and being submitted is actually what you would WANT to be when you understand it. Submitting is only agreeing to BE AGREEABLE and allowing HIM to hear from God and allow God to lead YOU THROUGH HIM, and IF he was lovingly being the responsible one for ALL your needs, why would you "buck" him? If he always listened to your concerns and your feelings and comforted your every fear and assured you of your liberty and love, why would you buck his leadership? If he KNEW his "mission" was to live like God intended as responsible head over the family, why wouldn't you place you "mission" UNDER his? That is the way God set it up and it is for your safety and protection and security. I do know how you feel and think when you don't have any loving example and when some preacher says it like you think it is now... it is a LIE FROM THE PITS OF HELL!
Did you know that men who don't love their lives like Jesus loves the church have a gender prejudice and are filled with fear and hatred and are ruled by a spirit named "masogony".. and likewise, women who don't love godly leadership and blame men for all their life problems and suspect of all men are filled with hatred and rebellion and have a gender prejudice; being ruled by a spirit called "misandry".
Read Ephesians about husbands and wives.., it's beautiful.
Dont worry about people who don't understand.
Thanks for the question!
He IS the HEAD (responsible priest) of the household and has been given AUTHORITY over the devil and under God in your behalf. He will stand before God one day and give an account not only for himself, but for his marriage: wife and children.
Then you, as the wife, as the HEART of the marriage/household have been given INFLUENCE over him, the children, and with God in your husband's and children's behalf and will give an account for how you used that influence for God's mission in their lives.
Some irate preacher has nothing to do with my marriage, but being in church IS a part of our God-relationship. I wouldn't sit under a preacher who didn't understand God's teachings regarding marriage and family and leadership. Men who can't submit to God, CANNOT marry a woman who will submit. Men who try and "be the boss" don't have a clue about who God is or who Jesus Christ is. Jesus Christ got the name he has "above every name" because he placed his mission on earth UNDER the mission of the Father and put his flesh under the mission of His spirit.