I have always had great respect for the Catholic religion, but not sure about annullment?

Question

My second husband is Catholic, and I've put some serious thought into converting, however when I found out that I would have to annul my first marriage, I decided not to. I have a son with my first husband, and I thought that would hurt him. Now, my son is 13, I have one child with my second husband, and just found out I'm pregnant again. My husband has not been able to let go and bond with any other denomination, and only feels comfortable in a Catholic church, therefore, our church-going has been erratic. I'm thinking that now that I will have 2 kids with him, the right thing would be for me to convert and annul my first marriage so we can find our church "home", and raise our two kids in a home that has a stronger Christian foundation. I'm just worried that all of this will alienate my son (lives w/ us part-time...goes to Baptist church youth program). What do you think? How should I handle?

I'm afraid that becoming Catholic will alienate my son because he will have to attend Mass with us...and cannot partake in communion, and won't know all the "stuff" there is to know. Believe me, there is some level of discomfort in attending a Catholic church, yet not being Catholic.

What is the annulment criteria??

Answer 1

The Catholic Church believes that God does not recognize civil divorces.

Jesus said, "Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate." (Mark 10:9)

However there may be hope of a declaration of nullity.

The term "annulment" is a misnomer because the Church does not undo or erase a marriage bond.

Rather the Church issues a declaration of nullity when it discovers that the parties were not truly joined by God and hence a full spiritual sacramental marriage as understood by the Church was not present.

Then the parties are free to marry for the first time.

Grounds for nullity include:
+ Either one or both of the spouses were not baptized persons during the time of marriage
+ An unauthorized marriage by a Catholic before someone other than a designated priest or deacon
+ A marriage where one of the spouses had an impediment such as a previous marriage and civil divorce
+ A marriage where there was a deficiency in consent or the ability of one or both the spouses

The procedure is the same whether or not there are children in the marriage. If a declaration of nullity is granted then the children are still considered legitimate and retain all legal rights (Canon 1137).

Approach the appropriate person your in your parish who has been trained in the process. If you encounter difficulties, you may go directly to the diocese.

Be prayerful, honest and patient. It takes a while.

With love in Christ.

Answer 2

*Is Catholic*

The annulment is not going to be the problem with your 13 year old son, it will be you becoming Catholic. Some Baptist programs can be hostile to Catholicism. If right now, your son does not have problems with you going to a Catholic Church, then this will not be a problem.

If your son does not have a problem with you being divorced from his father, then he will not have a problem with the annulment, so long as people don't fill his head with false statements.

An annulment is a decree of nullity of the sacramental nature of the marriage. It does not say that you were not bound together or did not love each other. The Catholic Church recognizes that the marriage was bound according to civil law (save where the marriage violated civil law) but not the law of the Church. IN FACT, the Church requires a civil divorce before even considering the granting of an annulment.

So if you keep things straight, your son will not have a problem with the annulment.

BUY THIS BOOK
Annulments And The Catholic Church: Straight Answers To Tough Questions by Edward N. Peters

It will solve all your questions and tell you what to do.

Yes I know all about not being able to take communion. I am a convert to Catholicism and there is some level of discomfort, but that changes when you begin to believe. When you begin to believe, it becomes longing and anticipation. That is when an individual decides to convert. Perhaps your son will be come Catholic. It is not a bad choice.

Answer 3

Well first of all, you can't just decide to "annul" a marriage. Annulment isn't divorce. Divorce dissoves a civil contract. Annulment doesn't dissolve anything, because a valid Christian marriage cannot be dissolved by anything other than the death of one of the spouses. Annulment is not "a way that the Catholic Church recognizes a divorce" as one poster above incorrectly stated, because the Catholic Church NEVER recognizes divorce. There are however a number of essential criteria that must be present in order to have a valid Christian marriage. An annulment proceding is simply an investigation into the circumstances of a putative marriage, to see if all required criteria were present at the time of the wedding. If they were, then the annulment would be denied. But if there was a serious deficit at the time of the wedding that prevented full validity, then an annulment may be granted.

Also, there is no valid reason for converting to Catholicism other than recognizing that the Catholic Church is the one true Church founded by Jesus Christ for all mankind, and the only Christian Church He ever authorized, and firmly believing everything the Holy Catholic Church teaches. If you don't fully accept the doctrinal teaching of the Catholic Church, then you won't really be Catholic, even if you go through the motions of converting.

You could go through the RCIA program before making a final decision. This is a series of informal instructional classes that serve as a foundation in the Catholic faith. It would be required if you did want to convert, but the classes can also be taken as a means of learning about the Catholic faith, without commitment to conversion. I teach this program in my own parish.

Answer 4

First of all, annulling your first marriage would have no bearing on your son one way or another. An annulment does not CHANGE anything. It doesn't mean that you were never legally married, or that the legal marriage never happened. It doesn't make your son illegitimate

An annulment is simply a declaration of facts that already exist.

What I mean is, if you seek a decree of nullity, there will be an investigation of sorts (mostly you just file paperwork), and a tribunal will determine whether or not your first marriage was Sacramental in nature. If it wasn't Sacramental, then presto, you get a decree of nullity and you and your husband can have your current marriage regularlized (blessed) and he can return to full communion with the Church (whether or not you convert) once he goes to Confession for missing Mass so often all this time.

If it was Sacramental, it's impossible to get an annulment because "what God has joined together, let no man seperate." This would put you in the untenable position of having two husbands, and your husband in the untenable position of being an adulterer. Which is why the Church strongly encourages people to get annulments BEFORE they marry again. If this is the case, the only remedy that will enable you to join the Church (if that's what you want) and your husband to return to full communion is to live as brother and sister until your first husband dies.

Please know that the Church wants to help you out of this pickle. That's what the annulment process is for, to help you clarify that the first marriage was not Sacramentally valid.

Again, it doesn't mean your first marriage wasn't legal or never happened, and it doesn't mean that your son is illegitimate.

You added a message asking for annulment criteria. Each case is judged individually, because the Church respects the fact that each couple and each marriage is completely unique. There are a few circumstances that are more likely to produce an annulment than others, but it's impossible to say with any certainty in your particular case. You'd have to consult a priest.

Basically, for a marriage to be valid, each person (man and woman) has to have a thorough understanding of what marriage is and what the vows mean; each must be entering the marriage of their own free will (not pressured into it because of a pregnancy, trying to get out of an abusive household, wanting financial or personal satisfaction, rebounding from a recent break-up, etc.), and each person must be intending to stay faithful to the marriage forever (i.e., the guy who intends to keep sleeping with girls on the side would not be entering into a valid marriage).

Again, going through the process is the only way to know for sure, but consulting a priest would help give you an idea of what it might entail.

As for your son feeling out of place at Mass, everybody does at first. If he's been raised to appreciate different cultures, then you can tell him it's a way of appreciating his step-father's culture. Perhaps Catholicism will appeal to him in the long run and he'll want to convert himself, who knows?

Answer 5

12. My sister (a Catholic) wants to marry a Protestant who is divorced, but her priest said he would need to apply for an annulment, and if he didn't get one, they couldn't get married. Why does the Church make even Protestants go through annulment process?

Since only Catholics are bound to observe the Catholic form of marriage, the Church recognized the marriages of all non-Catholics and assumes they are valid unions unless proven otherwise. She even recognized the marriage of two baptized Protestants as a sacrament, even if they themselves don't believe marriage is a sacrament and even if the wedding took place in the presence of a justice of the peace. Thus, your sister can't marry a man who is already validly married to someone else.

According to Christ's own words, that would be committing adultery . Civil divorce never changes one's actual marital status in the eyes of the Church, whether Catholic or not ....

11. My parents were married for more than twenty-five years, with five kids, but even they granted an annulment by the Church. How can the Church all of a sudden say after so much time that my parents' marriage never existed? Doesn't this make me an 'illegitimate child'?

First, a clarification about "legitimacy." This is a term used by various legal systems throughout the world to ensure a child's paternity. (It's usually quite obvious who the mother is.) From a faith perspective, however, God is the Father of us all. So, regardless of the circumstances of conception, there is really no such thing as an "illegitimate child" in God's eyes.

An annulment, then does not make the children of that relationship illegitimate. This is a common misunderstanding that needs unambiguous clarification. Furthermore, a declaration of nullity from the Church does not affect the state's legal recognition of the paternity of the children. Even legally speaking, the children remain "legitimate."

A declaration of nullity does not and cannot erase your parents' relationship. They obviously were together for many years. They had good times and bad. They conceived and raised children. None of this is "wiped away." it's certainly difficult to come to terms with the fact that on the day of the wedding, something prevented your parents from entering marriage validly. But, again, it's important not to let sentiment cloud sound reasoning.

Sound reasoning recognizes that marriage is not something that just "happens" to a couple by going through the motions of a wedding. Some things - many things - can prevent couples from entering marriage validly. While most invalid marriages are determined to be such within the early years of the relationship, it's not impossible for a couple to live together for many years and raise a family, only later to discover after a thorough tribunal investigation that their marriage was not entered validly.

Children of marriages that have been declared null by the Church should never despair. It's God's very nature to bring good out of all situations. In fact, such children are perhaps the greatest good that God brings out of marriages that are later proven invalid.
--------- -------- --------
Second Part: Annoying you're 13 year old son.

They have "RCIA" classes your son can also take. These classes are 6-9 months long and you son is NOT obligated to join the Church. What would happen is you all go to a specified "Mass" and then your son will leave with others who are CONCIDERING joining Catholosism. Hey, it might not be your son's cup of tea ... but as a parent you do have the right to manage his time ... and ah, it's not he (your child) who gets to choose, but you the parent. Certainly, if he dislikes it enought to refuse to be open minded, then you might find a baby-sitter for him instead --- or your former church might have a bus that would pick him up and take him to those activities.

It sounds kinda like your son is still hanging onto getting you back together with your first husband. Sometimes this causes kids to do radical stuff. You might find the counsiling services provided by the Church to help you gain parental control again.

Answer 6

Which church or religion is not the question here. Rather your feelings of comfort, responsibility and respect are in question. If your belief is that Christ died for our sins and you wish to follow his teachings by all means do so. The different religions preach similar lines with a basic theme of love for one another. Understanding plays a big part in the whole picture (that understanding would have to come from all of you -dads, kids and you!) Please understand that it is not the sign on the church that drives us but the choices we make outside of 'church' in our daily lives. The annulment is just a 'thing of this world' and not a big deal. The big deal is that the first mar rage did not work (?) and you are looking to move on. Talk with all concerned with love and understanding and the Father and Son will will lead you.

Answer 7

Ask your son if he would like to convert to catholicism. If he declines, make sure that he continues to go to the Baptist church even as you and the rest of the family goes to the Catholic Church. You can still pray together and celebrate Christmas and Easter together. There are enought things in common between the Baptist and Catholic Church to be able to be a family.

Answer 8

Why would you getting an annulment alienate him? Tell him that it is a way for the Catholic church to recognize a divorce. It's the simplest answer and at 13 he should be able to understand that without a problem.

Also, has your husband tried to go to other churches? I was raised Catholic but we now attend an Episcopal church. It's very much the same, at least in traditions and we enjoy it.

Answer 9

Roman Catholicism is #a million interior the first branch of Christianity Christianity began interior the 1st century advert as a Jewish sect, and shares many religious texts with Judaism, specifically the Hebrew Bible, huge-unfold to Christians because of the fact the previous testomony (see Judeo-Christian). there's a sort of doctrines and practices among companies calling themselves Christian. those companies are many circumstances labeled below denominations, although for theological factors many companies reject this type equipment.Christianity might additionally be a great deal represented as being divided into 3 significant groupings: a million) Roman Catholicism: The Roman Catholic Church, the biggest unmarried physique, comprises the Latin ceremony and totals greater effective than a million billion baptized persons. 2) jap Christianity: eastern Orthodox churches, Oriental Orthodox churches, the a hundred,000 member Assyrian Church of the East, and others with a mixed club of greater effective than 3 hundred million baptized individuals. 3) Protestantism: businesses such as Anglicans, Lutherans, Reformed/Presbyterians, Congregational/United Church of Christ, Evangelical, Charismatic, Baptists, Methodists, Nazarenes, Anabaptists, seventh-day Adventists and Pentecostals. The oldest of those separated from the Roman Catholic Church interior the sixteenth century Protestant Reformation, observed in many circumstances by greater divisions. Estimates of the total sort of Protestants are very uncertain, partly on condition that of the challenge in figuring out which denominations will might desire to be placed in this type, even if it sort of feels to be unquestionable that Protestantism is the 2d main branch of Christianity (after Roman Catholicism) in sort of followers

Answer 10

This is why you never should have a married a non Christian to start with.

Your new husband needs to get saved.

You should all attend a Bible believing church like the one your older son is attending.

The Roman Catholic Church is an evil religion which has man made rules which alienate children.

There is nothing Christian about the RCC.

Pastor Art