My fiance and I have lived together for almost 4 years, we have 2 daughters together, and we are finally getting married in a month. He just wants to go golfing with his friends, and I want to just do a small little party at my house with the girls for our parties. I thought games, margaritas and hot wings sounded fun. BUT... all of our friends are complaining that they want to go to bars and get smashed. Should I tell them that if that's what they want to do then don't bother coming to the bachelor and bachelorette parties? If I do I'm afraid they will get mad at us, but they aren't respecting our decision to not want to go out. HELP!!!
2007-07-02 07:51:44 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I should add that I'm not hosting my own.. my maid of honor is. But she knows how we feel about going out all the time, so that's why we decided on this. Also, we just went out with them recently and had a blast and they go out everynight. Can't they give the single's scene a rest for us for a couple hours?
2007-07-02 08:02:28 · update #1
First of all, congratulations on your upcoming marriage.
Now for your issue...Everything that has to do with this wedding is about you and your future husband. This is your day. This includes the bachelorette party, the shower, the engagement party, etc. etc.
Your MOH and friends need to accept your wishes and respect your decision. They have the rest of the days of the year to go out and be "single" if they choose to.
If your friends are complaining, they are being selfish. I know, getting drunk is considered "the thing to do" but it really isn't what the bachelor/bachelorette party is all about. It's about celebrating your upcoming marriage to the person you love with the friends that you love.
Stick to your guns and just remain positive. They aren't trying to hurt you, they think this is how you should have fun. You tell them how YOU want to have fun. This is your wedding and they need to remember that.
2007-07-03 03:58:10 · answer #1 · answered by Sandy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friends are being silly. If they want to go out and get smashed, let them come up with some other excuse. They are just trying to use your event as the excuse. Whoever is throwing the party should plan something that the guest of honor will enjoy. Why plan a party you know the person you are trying to honor is going to hate? That is rude, unthoughtful, and selfish on the part of the host. If they won't plan the party you want, plan it yourself. If they refuse to attend or grumble about it, you'll just have to realize that perhaps your friends are more selfish than you thought.
2007-07-02 15:03:30 · answer #2 · answered by rosekm 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if your MOH isnt going to do what YOU want then forget them all and plan your own bash. My friends were very careful to do exactly what they KNEW I would enjoy, and it was the best time ever! We all hung at my place, got smashed and played card games all night. It was truely a lot of fun to stay in with the girls and just be ourselves. (my friend even took on a russian accent for 2 hours!).
the bachalortette party is all about you...and if you arent up for bars and such seriously stress that. Tell them a quiet night in with booze and food if all your need to have a good time. Stress is big time, and maybe have the little ones go to grandmas.
2007-07-02 15:16:58 · answer #3 · answered by ♥Mommy to 3 year old Jacob and baby on the way♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is your event. You should be able to have a party at your house if you see fit and your friends should look forward to the event. Tell your friends they can hit the bars and get smashed the other 364 days during the year. Real friends would respect your wishes every time.
2007-07-02 15:01:28 · answer #4 · answered by Rckets 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The point is to spend time bonding with your girls. It's up to you what you want to do. They can go out any day of the week and get smashed if they want. My husband went golfing with his friends, and me and the girls went to a place called Bath Junkie. Then later that night, the guys and girls got together and we had a barbecue. We all had a blast, without going to bars and getting drunk. You aren't the one who needs to respect their decision, they need to respect yours. I personally would rather do the margaritas and wings!
2007-07-02 16:16:08 · answer #5 · answered by PhantomRN 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think these kind of parties are always kinda iffy. they are throwing them, but they are for you. but in the end, i think they would want you to have a good time. they can get smashed any other time they wanted so why pick a time when you do not want to. 0_0 i hope they do not plan on getting smashed at your wedding. i think you need to talk to them and say i would feel more comfy if we did it this way, we can party any time, but i would really like to remember that night.
2007-07-02 17:48:27 · answer #6 · answered by Christina V 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if they are real friends then they will respect your decision. I think you should still invite them to your party and tell them if they still insist on going to a bar and getting smashed then they could do it another day without you. I'm sure once you let them know how you feel they will come to their senses if not, then you know where you stand with them. CONGRATULATIONS!!
2007-07-02 14:59:46 · answer #7 · answered by hazeleyes1279 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, your friends sound selfish. I would nicely tell them to go out and get smashed on their own time. It seems that you might need to look for new friends anyway.
2007-07-02 15:35:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you throwing your own bachelorette party? If your friends want to do the bar thing, then they should arrange it for you. You shouldn't have to host your own bachelorette party.
2007-07-02 14:59:55 · answer #9 · answered by Aunie Stina 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Simply don't invite the friends that want to get smashed. If they can't respect your wishes, what kind of friends are they, anyway??
2007-07-02 15:46:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋