Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a chap carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."
"Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer. Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"
"I'm a hit man," was the reply.
"You're joking!" was the response.
"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are my tools."
"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here." So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house. "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window. Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she's naked! What's that? Wait a minute, that's my neighbor in there with her. He's naked as well! The *****!" He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"
"I do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger."
"Can you do two for me now?"
"Sure, what do you want?"
"First, shoot my wife, she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth. Then the neighbor, he's a mate of mine, a bit of a lad, so just shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson."
The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes. "Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently. "Just wait a moment, be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think I can save you a thousand dollars here....."
2007-07-02 04:30:49 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
i dont get it
2007-07-02 05:05:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol way to funny 10/10 plus a star i love this joke
2007-07-02 12:14:45 · answer #2 · answered by mommy to be 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HA ha ha ha ha ha ha ha humm to be able to save a thousand dollars with one shot. looks like he is waiting for her to talk into the microphone
2007-07-02 11:39:23 · answer #3 · answered by Smokey. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahahaha that's funny!you get a star 4 that one!lmao
2007-07-02 11:48:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats funny as hell
2007-07-02 11:43:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahaha
2007-07-02 11:41:31 · answer #6 · answered by malgosia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and you say its rated PG! lol...
2007-07-02 13:35:57 · answer #7 · answered by emkay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol
2007-07-02 12:33:17 · answer #8 · answered by Grand pa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol. hilarious!
2007-07-02 11:37:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol, how smart!
2007-07-02 11:43:52 · answer #10 · answered by ravish2006 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋