Men & Sex.?

Question

The last men I have dated ( all different ages and types too!) have all asked me for sex, a lot on the second date also. Im really not into sexuality al that much, and I find sleeping with people soon too much for me. The question is, what do men look for in women to make them want to have something serious with them? Im tired of the sex talk all the time.....

I have an education, I don't dress revealing, Im not a teaze...theres nothing about me that hints off that im an easy person. Im not!

Answer 1

It has nothing to do with you. A guy who doesn't have any respect for you as a woman is going to try his hand just the same. It is because that is becoming the norm now, we as women are giving ourselves away to freely, without thought of the consequences to other women who are not promiscuous. Many females find nothing wrong with sleeping with a man they barely know, it has become a part of the changing with times. That is why guys often don't want to take a traditional girl on a real date because there are plenty of women who don't mind going to a bar or his house for drinks and a romp in the sheets. That is also why STDs are so prevalent in our society. It use to be the younger generations but now even older men and women, (divorcees out looking for a good time) are engaging in such irresponsible behavior, but that doesn't mean you have to just because everyone else is. It is not a matter of what a man is looking for in a woman, because obviously you are not setting yourself out on display, it is a matter of the state of mind of the man. Maybe the guys you meet simply are not ready to settle down and have anything serious; and are just out to have a good time. Consider where you meet these guys and maybe choose other locations or places where you might find a wholesome man. That is the reason why I don't even bother talking to guys if they even look at me like I am steak on a platter because that alone shows where their mind is at. I am a mother and student and prefer guys that I can talk to and connect with on a deeper level. But a man is a man and he is going to try his hand, just put him in his place and let him know that you aren't interested up front, if he stops talking to you he wasn't worth your time and it is his loss. Keep your head up and don't lower your standards because a good quality man is going to appreciate your chasteness and will love and respect you all the more for it. All the best.

Answer 2

I think pretty much every guy wants to have sex with a girl he is on a date with, otherwise he wouldn't be there. Maybe you seem really easy going and guys feel they can talk to you about sex. You didn't say how old you are, but if you are above 25, you can expect this a lot. Single women above 25 are usually okay with having sex early on in a relationship(or at least that is the general concensus).

Next time you go on a date and the subject of sex is brought up say something off the wall like "I've dated A LOT, I used to sleep with my dates within the first hour of meeting, but they always wanted a relationship afterwards."(as straight faced as you can). Wait for his response, now say "Of course I am just kidding, what do you think I am a big s-lut?"(and start laughing). I know it doesn't sound like much, but the pyschology that you use, makes the person realize you are not a tart, makes them think that you are funny and a bit different, and it will probably deter talk about sex, for a while a least. Single guys have less sex than single girls(unless the guy is a stud), so it probably weighs pretty heavy on their minds. Don't take it pesonally. Good Luck!

Answer 3

First off, good luck with that.

Now, to the question.

Men usually spend the money and the time for dates and such for a purpose. They (we?) feel as if there needs to be like a reward for the effort, but a lot of guys don't see you being happy as a good enough payback for their decrease in wallet size. It's a very cynical way of looking at it, but sadly it's how a lot of men think.

A strategy for weeding them out early is to bring it up in a conversation on like the second date, and talk about how much you don't really like it. If they agree, just watch and see, sometimes they are genuine, sometimes not, but if they become indifferent, that's a sure sign. I'd give that a try.

Answer 4

it's not that women are wearing revealing clothing that men think about sex all the time... it's just the fact that they are men. if men are actually looking for someone it is usually just to have sex ( not all the time though... i cant speak on all men's behalf. ) But you will find that it is when a man is not looking for a relationship that his true self is exposed and he is more open to a relationship were sex is not the only thing that grabs his attention. thats how it was with me and my fiance' ( i apologize for the terrible spelling). and it would not be wise to assume that just because you are well educated men would not be interested. men need to be intellectually stimulated by their significant other just as much, if not more, than women. the best advice that i can give is just stop looking. He'll find you. All a man is really looking for is someone that he can rely on. and that kind of trust grows with time.

Answer 5

The whole third date rule seems to have accelerated in our reality television day and age. For myself, a child of the nineties, I went on three dates to get the kiss...and much more time, conversation, and getting to know one another as the intimacy increased...we were called "sensitive nineties guys."

I don't think there are any inherent characteristics that one should flaunt to attract less-aggressive males. Just know that the average twenty year old nowadays has grown up in the hyper-sexualized "aughts" where pawing at women is normal. Hold out hope, I'm sure there's some good ones out there.

Answer 6

Ultimately, most adults are seeking a sexual relationship. Whether it's a one-night stand, a casual fling, or a long-term commitment.

Men are generally predatory. They enjoy the thrill of the hunt...the chase. And they only value things (or women), that they have to work for.

I've found that most men, when young, are more concerned with sowing their wild oats, than settling down. And, it's harder these days, to make a choice, with so many available options.

The key is communication. Be clear about what you want, and what you don't want. Find someone who genuinely enjoys your company and is willing to wait until you're both ready.

Answer 7

Oh my I have finally found a nother person like me. If a guy really wants to have sex with you, he will wait other wise he can go else were and get it.Now if he cares anything about you he will wait.Most men will ask you to have sex with them on the second or third date to see if you are easy, don't give in. Just come right out and tell them how you feel, if they don't like it they can go else were.If they like you they will wait. Now if within a week or two they say they love you they don't if they ask to have have sex with you. Now if within a week or two latter and you finally tell him you love him then you can say ok that you will have sex with him and then you will no he truthfullly loves you. Also they don't look for anything in a woman to want to have sex with you. This is a mans nature to want to have sex.This is a way to find out if you are easy.A man will test you to see if you are easy to see if you you sleep around or to see if you are a women he wants to marry.If you don't want have sex with him tell him up front you aren't easy .He may also test you to see if you will have sex with him and may stay around for a little while and he may go to others and say that you were an easy lay. Stand by the way you feel you don't have to go to bed with a guy on the second date if he really likes you he can and will wait for at least two or three weeks. Guys really like to test you just don't give in. Men look for a woman that is good in bed also if you can cook and how you keep your house also if you have a good personality and how you look in how you dress.All men are differant they look for differant things in a woman . I hope I've helped you and ansered what you wanted to know.

Answer 8

I was at the end of a 14 year relationship and found that most women I started to date wanted to go faster than me!

It seems to have become the norm.

I have met some women that wanted sex on the 1st date.

These guys might have had these same experiences, and now expect it from everybody.

Answer 9

I believe you have just met the wrong men, while sex is great it sounds like you want a committed relationship before taking that next step,, This can all be remedied on the first date, you can weed them out with up front conversation, also if you are on a dating site,, I would list that. although most men think with their little man head,

Answer 10

Some men are in the dating scene strictly to have sex.

This is where the hard work comes in - and my motto has always been ...

"You have to go through alot of bad ones, before you find that amazing guy."

Those guys asking for sex - they are only looking to be in your bed, not a part of your life.