Did you LOVE your wedding dress?

Question

Do you think it's important to love your wedding dress?

Without the long back story, for many reasons, I bought a dress that I don't love. Sometimes I feel like I'm trying to convince myself that I even like it. It's the closest dress I've found to what I want, but it's still so far off. I never thought I'd be the kind of girl who'd fret over a dress, but it's really starting to bother me. I WANT to LOVE my dress. I'd love to love THIS dress - and not have to go out and get another one. Do you think that's possible?

Thank you all for your replies so far!

I really have been looking hard for my dream dress (which I never would have guessed would be hard to find at all.) I've been looking for close to a year. I have looked on line, ebay, bridal shops, thrift stores, yard sales, craig's list, and I've looked at sewing patterns and costumes and costume patterns.

I just feel like I was born in the wrong time. I want something very classical, but with sleeves. Sleeves are not in style now, so there aren't a lot of choices. I have looked at Mormon dresses and all the sleeves offered at David's Bridal and all of the major wedding dress designers. And everything seems to miss the mark. If only I could mix and match.

Having a gown made... or making it myself...

I have seriously thought about this and have even priced fabric and tried to find a pattern. The danger with having something custom made is that you cannot be sure that it will actually turn out like you expect it to... or even come out looking like the sketch. It would also actually cost a lot more to do than I had budgeted for a dress... and if I didn't like the end product, it would be devastating.

I'm trying to find a bolero now, so at least I'd get my sleeves, but I haven't found one that works with my dress and has the sleeve shape I'd like. And I haven't found a pattern for it yet either.

Altering the dress to make it closer to what I wanted... other than the sleeves, the main thing is its color, ivory. Ivory is lovely, but I earned a white dress and would really like to have one.

But at least I have a dress... and I feel better knowing I have one, than if I didn't.

Answer 1

I loved my first dress for my first wedding. Still think it's beautiful when I look at the old pictures. The second dress, not so much - I was "talked into it" by the friend I took shopping and the people at the shop. I loved another dress, which would have required alterations. But this one fit perfectly and they all said "you look great & skinny" and so I bought it and let them also talk me into a large picture hat (Titanic was big that year). I regret both - especially the hat - and I wish I had bought that beautiful corset bodice dress I had wanted! So, what I'm saying is - you only get married once (or twice in my case!) have a dress you LOVE and what you want! I look at the pictures all the time & and while the dress was "okay" and it worked, I still wonder what the other one would have looked like.

Answer 2

I know a wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, but it's really a dress that you will wear only once, the groom will be looking at you and not the dress, and your wedding pictures will be put into a book which no one will look at for 40 years. And, the groom is supposed to pay for your wedding dress. So what is he saying about how you feel about your dress?
In addition, why not find a superb seamstress and take your gown there and ask if she will add sleeves to it to make it look the way you want. Normally the train and the veil is what makes the dress look very special. Why not concentrate on those two things (after you get the sleeves done).

Answer 3

This is a tough one. My friend is getting married and doesn't love her dress. It's gorgeous on her and suits her to a T physically, but it's not "her" at all, personality-wise. She just bought one of the first ones she tried on that she liked. Her wedding is this week and she's going into it not feeling comfortable in her gown.

However, the problem with always searching is that you'll never find just what you're looking for. Get your friends'/family's opinions - does this gown suit you? How do you look in it? Can someone make you sleeves to go with it?

If you still have time until your wedding, keep an eye out, but don't get your hopes up so high that you'll be disappointed if/when you can't find anything that matches your dream dress...

Answer 4

TOTALLY! I never thought it was the one of my dreams, or that I had any idea in my head of what it should be, but once I put it on, that was IT.
It was a very traditional gown, with long sleeves and a scoop neck, with a basque waist, leading to a full skirt and long train. It was embellished all over with crystals, beads, pearls and iridescent sequins, with lace appliques on the sleeves and bottom of the skirt. It was made of heavy bridal satin - and my wedding was the end of July, so I roasted through the ceremony, but got through! It was what I loved, so I just daintily sweated through it... The reception was fine because it was air conditioned.
I know there has been this plethora of strapless dresses out there, but had no idea it was so hard to find a gown with sleeves! Maybe you could try seek out a bridal seamstress to see if there were any way sleeves could be attached to your dress...

Answer 5

To answer your question in the shortest way possible - Yes.

I loved my dress - I mean LOVE loved my dress. I cried when I saw myself in it.

Try not to fret too much over the dress. And if I may - I know you've got your heart set on a certain style - but I'd still encourage you to go try on ANY dress you think "looks" pretty - the bead work, or you like the photo, etc. Just put them on. All of them. You may be pleasantly surprised.

I had an idea in my head of what I wanted (and a pretty clear one at that!), however, I thought the beadwork on a dress was very pretty. The style was NOT what I'd planned on. At all. But it looked AWESOME once I put it on, and I was totally surprised by it!

If all else fails, here are a couple websites that featured some long-sleeved dresses:
http://store.fairytaleendeavorsbridals.com/loslwedr.html
http://www.brideway.net/store/wg-a-longsleeves-pall.html

Best wishes to you!

Answer 6

I could not find what I was looking for in shops either. I found a really good dress maker and a pattern that I roughly liked, she sat with me and sketched what I had in mind and did not stop til she was satisfied that the sketch was exactly as I wanted it. Then she made the dress, I have had 3 fittings so far and she adjusts anything that I am not happy with. What I am trying to say to you is that a decent dress maker WILL be able to do what you are after, and it is not necessarily more expensive either, I had a budget of £400 for a dress and she made this one for me for £180. I would encourage you to look for a dress maker and have them design one for you, totally bespoke, it truly will be unique then.

Answer 7

It sounds like you have exhausted all avenues for making your dream dress happen. I thought I knew what I always wanted in a dress, and when I tried it on, I did not like it (on me)! And the dress I ended up with (which I LOVE), I tried on because they asked me to. So I guess what Im saying is, you dont have to forget about your dream dress, or throw away the one you have now, but try on as many different dresses as you can. Because... you never know... THAT could be the one you LOVE.

Answer 8

is there anything you can do to alter it? think about the parts of the dress that you DO love and focus on that. You might also consider checking into high-end thrift stores and ebay. You'd be surprised! Just remember- loving the details of the wedding day is nice- but as long as the person who is waiting for you at the alter is the one you love- you are ahead of the game.

Good luck, congratulations and enjoy your day!

Answer 9

I thought I found THE DRESS and then I tried it on and just hated the way it looked on me. I went shopping elsewhere with my mom and tried on a whole bunch of dresses. Surprisingly, the dress I liked best was one I just tried on because my mom really wanted to see me in it. On the hanger, it was nothing special, but on me, it came to life. I think you should feel like you have found THE DRESS when you put it on. Is it too late to take the dress back?

Answer 10

Yes, I loved my wedding dress. It was a color called candlelight. It had Schiffli embroidery all over it. It was beautiful, and very feminine.

I think you should keep looking until you find the dress you love. Good luck to you.