Anyone suffering from Depression....?

Question

How has it affected your relationships? Do you find it difficult to communicate with the people in your life that you love the most, and find yourself cutting them out of your life? More specifically, have you had to end a relationship because of it, but couldn't bring yourself to communicate any further with that person even if they were offering support and help?? I've found myself in this situation, and don't know what to do to help him. I'm trying to be a friend to him, but he's not very responsive to me and I don't know if I should leave him be or keep offering support and letting him know I am there so he knows that I haven't abandoned him. I'm just having a hard time trying to figure out his unresponsiveness. He doesn't seem to want anything to do with me

I'm trying to be patient. We were going out for about 3 months when he told me it wouldn't work out for now because he had to fix things in his life so he could be happy. This all happened about 5 months ago. Still has not given a definite answer on the relationship, he just doesn't know what will happen. I've been offering support as a friend, and every once in a while I write an email to see how he's doing and to let him know I am there. Some he responds to, some he doesn't. Last time he responded he said he was doing okay, but not the best and was managing to get by. He also said things were still uneasy but they are working their way out. I want to keep in touch with him so he knows I haven't abandoned him, but it's hard when he gives me the cold shoulder. I don't fully understand

Answer 1

Millions suffer!!! & it's Ruff on Relationships, most don't survive

Answer 2

Well it is obvious you do not suffer from depression but I do and I can understand what he is dealing with trust me on that and yes it did affect a relationship I was in and this was when I was first coping with the fact that I had depression and was trying to come to grips with it myself and I did not want anyone to know what I was going through and neither did I want to share that with anyone either because a lot of people get the wrong impression about people who suffer from depression like there is no hope for us well that could not be any further from the truth for one thing.
First of all what kind of depression does he have because their is more than one form of depression find out what kind he has and if you care for this person get as much information as you can about it and read up on it learn about it so you can better understand what he is dealing with on a daily basis don't just assume that he is giving you the cold shoulder because you are assuming this right now because you know nothing about his illness.
Yes! he will be unresponsive to you at times and he is not doing it on purpose either I know what I am talking about here I was that way myself but I sought professional help and I take medication as well and I am not that way anymore I still live with it but I know now how to deal with it and having your support is the best thing you can do for him knowing that someone has support is very important to anyone dealing with this even if he doesn't respond back to you all the time he won't at times so don't push the issue ok!
The decision to be supportive or leave him be is totally in your hands no one can tell you what to do there that is your decision all by yourself but make sure your doing it for all the right reasons and not all the wrong ones or making this and excuse just to get out of the relationship.
Since you have not walked a mile in his shoes and I have no matter what form of depression he has you need to get the thing out of your head that he does not want anything to do with you let me
ask you this how long has he been diagnosed with depression?
Is this new too him or has this been a long term problem that he has had?
And how long have you two known each other before and after he was diagnosed how long have you known him in other words did he show signs before this that you noticed or did you pick up on anything at all?
And one more thing I noticed when you said your trying to be a friend either you are or you aren't a friend don't use his illness to decide that it would be wrong we all have difficult things we have to deal with and cope with in our lives okay and maybe one day you may need a friend to help you through some difficult time in your life you can't see the future so you don't know right just remember what goes around comes around I wish you the best of luck with your decision and your friend and may God,keep you both strong ok!

Answer 3

Without treatment, meaning at least medication, if not therapy, this situation is not likely to change. He's not capable of forming a relationship, since his brain is not functioning properly. It has nothing to do with you, and I personally would begin to move on. It sounds to me like he is not doing the kind of things that will result in him getting well, and until he decides to do so, there's no reason for you to put your life on hold. It might be a long time. There's no reason why you can't stay friends as much as he allows and offer support as you can, but don't tie your life up with him as it stands now.

Answer 4

This is a hard situation...cause you don't know what he is thinking.one one hand it could be he is just confused or scared of something..on the other he could just not want a relationship at all.let him know your a friend and if he needs to talk you are there but don't constantly talk to him..you don't want him feeling trapped.The best thing to do is to let out your feeling with a friend and get your words down then talk to him.It is unfair for him to string you along and expect you to be there when he returns.Let him know you want a yes are we going to get back together or a no.If it is a no you will hurt for a while but you will have closure and know if you can move on with your life.

Answer 5

First of all what happen between two of you is the main thing. The best suggestion I can give you is to be in your boy friend situation for a while.

then write down the things according to him and think widely. May be you can see and judge things better when you see with his eyes.
Write down all the complains you have when you are pretending to be him and seeing yourself from his eyes.

wish you best of luck and I hope it will solve the problem. In my life by applying this techniqe I solved multiple problems so far.

Answer 6

"He doesn't seem to want anything to do with me"

You sound like a smart person. I would give this person the space he wants. If you do talk to him again in the near future, make him want you. All you have to do is not care so much, be real flirty with anyone but him, and make him think you can and will do better. There are to many fish in the ocean, quit trying to catch a clam.

Answer 7

People afflicted with chronic depression don't want to communicate with anyone. If he is on medication for it though, he should be feeling better by now. It usually takes four to six weeks for the meds to take effect. If he is not on any med, please try to get him to seek help. Severe depression doesn't go away on its own. Just let him know that you are there for him, but don't expect anything from him, because he can't give it.

Answer 8

Everybody goes through depression some just go through it more then others like i have gone through allot of **** but then again my rich friend hasnt hes had everything hes ever wanted.


bout this guy if hes not reaching out to you because he is bottleing things up inside dont leave him i went through it with my husband you have to still be there and help him open up to you one day he will get tired of being a closed book and will open himself up to you i promise now if hes just doing it because hes an assh0le then leave him cause you dont need none of that, you dont need anymore stress in your hands.

Answer 9

It sounds to me like he was pretty defininte about ending the relationship. If he is convinced it wont' work, then it isn't going to. It's time for you to stop clinging to something that isn't going to happen. He is getting on with what he needs to do, I suggest you do the same and move on.

Answer 10

Move on.